In the first few months after I decided to stop, I did cruise through the area a few times. After I got over that I haven’t had the urge to use street hookers. I do sometimes think about calling an agency, but I come to my senses quickly. I have been on a few business trips that I came close to calling an agency, but common sense always prevails.
I was on a Prozac-type drug for a brief period. It made me anorgasmic but did nothing to sap my sex drive, so it was unbearable. I stopped using it and continued therapy without it. That helped a lot and now I consider myself a perfectly happy person. Having normal relationships helped me realize I’m not the terrible loser I thought I was.
I think we would have a lot to talk about and I would have a lot of work ahead of me to fix our relationship. I don’t think she would leave me.
I have changed a lot, but I attribute it to just growing up (I guess I was a late bloomer) and addressing my problems in therapy. I am much better in social situations. You’d never know I was a skeevy perv in a past life.
Actually, I said that I did get to know a bit about some of the ones I picked up regularly.
Someone could surely become emotionally involved. I didn’t, for reasons I explained earlier. I heard a few stories about guys who asked for real dates and who wanted to take them away from the life.
By and large, they seemed like normal people with normal worries (kids, money, whirled peas). Some of them had serious drug problems, but so do some people I know who aren’t hookers. Some of the ones I got to know a bit more talked about abuse in their pasts. Anna (I mentioned her as one of my favorites) told me she started selling sex when she was 13. She didn’t mention abuse or molestation, but it seemed clear that something had happened to her early in life. I suspect abuse and molestation are a common thread, but other than that you wouldn’t suspect these women were hookers if you met them in another setting.
Rarely, but yes. It was always the younger ones. It was obvious some of them were doing it because a boyfriend had turned them out and it was painful to see them. If I thought she was really unhappy to be doing it, I would leave her alone and drop her off.
Did you ever hire an attractive light skinned black woman named Michelle ? She would have been in early 20s, worked out of the combat zone. Lost her kids, could have been strung out on drugs at that time.