I am the recent victim of a brutal homicide. Anything you want to know?
yeah, how are you posting?
The afterlife has wi-fi.
Best news I’ve heard all day!
How did it happen? Did it hurt? Were either you or your assailant(s) wearing hoodies?
Hm - hell’s wifi must only be intermittent. That seems about right, actually
Well we now know that either there is life after death or the OP has lost his mind.
How many bullets did you survive?
Is there corn in the afterlife?
-Popcorn is the new Kernel
I wasn’t wearing a hoodie, but I was wearing my Obama 08 T-shirt, so it could have been racially motivated. As to how it happened I can’t remember all the details but it involved a monkey with a gun. And it didn’t hurt all that much.
Did you see a bright light at the end of a tunnel?
Hell’s on dial-up.
So, did you get to watch your funeral from up above and all that? Did you try to touch your loved ones?
I’m not sure. I haven’t been to the cafeteria yet.
No. I went through a revolving door and ended up in the lobby of a building. Although I died wearing a T-shirt and jeans, I’m now wearing Khakis, a shirt and tie, and a plastic name tag.
Someone lead me past an infinite number of cubicles and then told me this one was mine. This cubicle has a computer, an in-basket and an out-basket, but both baskets are empty.
I’m not even sure they have found my body yet. I’ll surf over to the local newspaper’s site and see if my murder has been reported.
Thinking back on the murder, was there anything suspicious about the monkey that should have put you on alert? Any unfinished business you need us to wrap up for you? Any unclaimed winning lottery tickets we should know about?
Moving from IMHO to MPSIMS, er Cornfield.
Do you have a cubicle next to Moby?
Looking back on it, the fact that there was a monkey with a gun in my living room was probably a warning sign I shouldn’t have ignored. But I had just come home with Chinese food and my favorite TV show was about to start.
Well at least we know who did it:
Do you have any plans to haunt your killer? Aside from using the internet, have you figured out ways to interact with the mortal world?
Kinda seems like the answer ought to be “zero,” but I’m willing to let the OP prove me wrong.
Can you say hi to my grandpa?