I DIED?!
Count me in as one of the people who’d be real fuckin’ interested in those wake details, since a corpse-less funeral should be pretty fuckin’ strange. Ditto that fuckin’ obituary.
NotOkay–You sick fuck. What you just did is so fucking disturbing. I know we’re not supposed to accuse people of being trolls on this forum, but I beg special circumstances, Mods. Plus, this isn’t an accusation; it’s a FACT. This motherfucker is NOT my brother, and that was such a gross violation of forum rules, not to mention moral decency, I hope you’ll immediately ban this user (not that that will necessarily stop the fucker from popping back up with some other sn, masquerading as a normal human being…).
All: As fucking upsetting as it was to log in and read the board for the first time in a week and see some shithead griefing you all in such a disgusting way, the words you all said were jaw-dropping and extremely touching. I’m horrified and completely mortified that your profound goodness was exploited on my account by a fucking slug of a human being.
I’ll fill anyone in who wants to know what I’ve been up to this week, which has been a whole lot of medical bullshit and out of town travel to see specialists and FINALLY a diagnosis of gastric ulcers, on my other thread. That is, if I can pull off a double resurrection–one for me, one for my thread.
To that end, Mods–Can you reopen my thread? You wouldn’t want to make the girl who can’t use her arms have to copy and paste everything in it to another thread, would you? 
And if it needs to be said, I am a-okay, y’all! The AD riddle has been solved and I’m feeling right as rain.
…Or did you think a fuckin’ tummyache could really take me out? Please. I survived a fuckin’ broken neck. FTS INLIKMD! 
[My blinding rage pressed me to ditch my usual expletive self-censoring for this post. Sorry if your children are reading…but why aren’t they in bed anyway??].
