Why do people ask questions of their pets?
“Who’s a good girl?”
“Who’s the best doggie in the whole world?”
“Who’s a bad, bad boy?”
“Where’s my fat kitty at? Where’s the fattles?”
“Does he want his fat belly rubbed? Does hims?”
“What do you want? Do you want to climb the door?”
I don’t know, except that the answer is generally obvious.
I call these “petorical questions.”
“Did you really mean to scratch that furniture?”
Inevitably, the answer is a short “Yes” or a rather sarcastic “Well, it wasn’t going to scratch itself.”
I really don’t know why I even bother to ask.
“What does Kitty want? Hmmm? Ham? Are you SURE?”
I also threaten my cats. I tell them that I’m gonna scoop them up and go gitchy on their tummies.
Well, lemme tell ya a story. When we first got my chihuahua, he was so adorable (still is, actually) that everyone in the family argued over whose puppy he was. One day, I finally said “ok, let’s ask him whose puppy he is” and looked at him and said “Chili, who do you love?” He ran straight to me and jumped in my lap. Now, you would think it was just a case of “that human is making sounds at me, maybe she’s going to give me a treat?” right? Yep, that’s what we figured, too, so my daughter asked him who he loved – he stayed in my lap. We put him in the middle of the floor and no matter who asked him “Chili, who do you love?” he consistently ran to me. He taught us a new trick! So, I donno – maybe they do grok?
Why The @#$%& Are You Eating That???
Our cats like to talk, so it’s fun to ask them questions because it emulates a conversation.
My dog sienna vocalizes back when you ask her a question. usually it’s “poof” , though occasionally she’ll “murf”, or whine as well. It’s cute, and she’s learned that "answering gets her hugs.
Meow
Why Yes Bob it is cold outside
Meow
I dunno, mother nature and all
Meow
Yeah I missed you too
Meow
Well you have to hold on daddy is in there right now
Meow
I KNOW
Meow
Yeah I am getting ready for work
Meow
Oh come on now, you know Hanna loves you, but your fur is cold
Meow
Yeah daddy will be out soon
Meow
So did you make your usual rounds?
Meow
Yeah, well thats nice
Meow
Yes I know how it is, you are the pretty boy
Meow
Well of course
::::flush::: door opens
Meow
Go get your breakfast Bob*
Every single morning. The conversation changes now and then to amuse myself but as long as you talk he will answer.
*Just to be clear the cat and dog food dishes are in the bathroom.
I hate myself a little more every time I am in the car with the dog and maybe stop quickly or something and say to her “are you ok?”
Like she’s gonna answer or something.
I am so ashamed 
That’s just because my cat’s name is Leroy Brown*.
*It’s not.
Niiiiiiiiiice. I am so stealing that! 
I ask my cat how her day was, when I get home from work. In the mornings though we talk in her language. I think she might be part Siamese, which makes her talkative.
Meow?
“Meow!”
Meow!
“Mrow?”
Mrow?
“Mmmmmowwww”
mmmmooowwwww
“mow?”
mow?
“Me-yow”
me-yow
(etc.)
Where’s your brother/sister?
Presumably because people usually talk to babies the same way. With babies, it helps them learn to talk. With pets, not so much.
Where are you?
How did you get there?
What do you want to eat?
Who’s fighting?
What do you think you’re doing?
Will you shut up?
Will you SHUT UP?
Where did all that food go?
Can I have some of MY sandwich?
Who took another bath in the water bowl?
Did you make this mess?
Is this yours?
Did you just say something?
Who’s the pretty bird?
The cool thing about having parrots… sometimes they DO answer back!
I actually disagree with that last sentence. Pets (especially IME dogs) do learn some language. So, asking your dog, “do you want to go outside?” might be a practical question, if your dog has learned what “outside” means.
I realize this isn’t the primary reason people talk to their pets. I know I anthropomorphize the animals in my family to a great extent. But, for all of the lunacy of talking to my mom’s dog or cats, I do feel that they do experience some degree of comprehension (at least occasionally).
ETA: Now that I’ve posted this, I see that the sentence I disagreed with related to learning to talk. I must concede that pets don’t learn to talk, but my point about comprehension still stands.
Yes! My girl cat actually answered this one once. I came into the room, and asked her, “Where’s your brother? Where’s Rex?” She got up off the sofa, stretched, and I swear, she heaved a sigh before walking over to the door that separates the living room from the furnace room. She sat down in front of it, and looked at the crack under the door. Suddenly, a gray paw stuck out under the door! Rex had gotten himself locked in earlier that day.
We call that “The Day C.C. Played Lassie.”
I often ask my cats to do things or fetch things for me. But they’re ungrateful brats and inevitably just stare at me. Little delinquents, I tell ya. You bring somebody up right, and what do you get? Nothing but attitude.