Attractive people should get hit by cars but not die

Yeah so I have problems. But who doesn’t, you know? And actually, I’m quite sane and nice and healthy, I think. But sometimes I get so frustrated with attractive people. I’m not allowed to wish them to die, and I don’t want to, either. But it would be kinda nice if they all tripped and fell a few times or got lightly stricken by cars. You know what I’m talking about?

They all go walking around with their cute clothes and sunglasses and strong jawlines and trendy disheveled hair, etc, etc. Stupids. They’re so dumb. I hate feeling inferior and I hate others to feel unjustifably superior. Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Naw, don’t hate me because I’m jealous or irrational. I’m just venting, right? I want to love them and I want to hate them all at the same time. I think that’s really at the root of a lot of problems with men being gay. You know what I mean? It’s scientifically proven (don’t ask me to prove it or provide sources; just believe me) that a certain part of a man’s brain becomes stimulated when they see an “attractive” male, a part that’s at the root of aggressive, competitive emotions. So when a guy is gay, they have this biological response, but at the same time, they also want to be intimate and romantic and love the guy… So it’s like this big internal duel… No wonder we’re all so screwed up and insecure and masochistic and hard to be monogamous.

I hate the competition that plagues our stupid “Are You Hot?” American society these days. Blah blah blah blah blah I’m posting too much and it disturbs me that some people are finding trends among posters. I hope nobody finds any trends in mine because I don’t want somebody to think they know me without having met me. Blarhg blargha blargh! Oh, and I love the term asshat. It’s going to be the next big hit, and we all owe that one poster for it.

Therapy dude, it’s worth it.

** Qazzz ** You need serious therapy IMHO.

I do believe I’m going to beat Mockingbird to the punch, and call: Cite on your “scientific” information. I want to see this for myself.

Um…what the hell are you talking about? Are you drunk/high? :confused:

You seem to be upset that…uh, well, I’m not exactly sure. That some people have “stronger jawlines” and nicer clothes than you? But this somehow ties into car accidents and gay men?

Please try and make sense next time you feel the need to rant. On this planet, that’s just common courtesy.

Qazzz: I disagree. So there.

Zabali_Clawbane: Whaddaya think this is, GQ? Asking for cites in the Pit? Pshaw.

Qazzz, you need an LJ code? Or an aspirin? I’ve got both.

Yes, Qazzz, because people have control over the way they look. I think people who judge others by what they look like should be hit by cars and not die. Really, really big cars. You do realize there’s a difference between hating good looking people and people who are obsessed with their appearances, right? There’s also a huge difference between people who couldn’t help but to be born attractive and the people who worship them because of that. You’re a dorkus, Qazzz.
…Is that a car I hear coming? It is. YES!

Los Angeles, Calif. (AP) - 500,000 attractive people were hit by cars today throughout greater Los Angeles. They were rushed to hospitals, where they were all released with minor bruises and trendy disheveled hair. “I don’t know what happened,” actor Brad Pitt was quoted as saying. “Jen and I just tripped in front of a car.” Halle Berry, George Clooney and that guy from the Calvin Klein ads could not be reached for comment.

Carrot Top is reported to be uninjured.

From my understanding of the pit, in recent notorious threads blush the OP has to be able to back up what they are saying at least a little, Ethilrist.

I want to see this “scientific evidence” he claims to have seen. I doubt it exists in fact, but I’m giving him a chance to try to prove it at least.

Not a fucking chance.

[snort]
[snicker]

Anyone who presumes to judge the intelligence of others based on their looks is inferior.

Qazzz - didn’t you just start a thread about how much you hook up and think you are such a whore? How unattractive are you dude? Obviously not that much…Damn! take your fucking prozac will ya?!

:dubious:
Cite?

Naw, just kidding. So, if I start a thread in MPSIMS, saying that I am, in fact, the reincarnation of Clark Gable, I need to provide some sort of proof of that?

Dang. Guess I can start wearing t-shirts again.

Well.

That was - interesting.

I’m almost thinking this must be some sort of parody without the appropriate warning…

Maybe the humor-impaired should sit on rickety chairs and fall down, go boom - or slip on a banana peel. What part of this “fact” is not clearly a joke?

As far as I can tell, the OP is using humor to deal with his problems. Good on him, I say.

Has school let out already?

Need I remind youj.c. that because this is a print forum, there is a need to denote humor in cases like this?

Arghggh you guys are relentless. Of course a lot of what I’m saying is in jest… I don’t exclusively judge a person’s worth on clothing. Hmmm maybe my humor is a bit too dark.

I really enjoyed Eve’s news article though. :slight_smile: It was so funny.

And I’ll look for the Psychology Today article in which I read about the male competition / aggressive brain thing.

And I’ve gone to therapy for about six years now.

I’m just overwhelmed by beauty and frustrated by society.

Jason Priestly was in a car that* Hit A Wall!* A team of stylists was flown in to repair his broken hair.

While drunk a couple weeks back, I beat a cocky guy at pool. He called me a “pretty boy”. That made me laugh for quite a while. I think that the guy was either repressed, or Qazzz.