Baby I want you in the worst way possible...

Having sex with Sandpaper Sally. There was a girl in my high school nicknamed Sandpaper Sally. She was known as the easiest girl in school. A nerdy new kid transferred to the school and we set up a date with Sally and him. The next day we asked him how the date went and he said fine. They went to a movie then had something to eat. Then they went to her house because no one was home. They started kissing and pretty soon they both knew where it was heading. She excused herself and told him to take off his clothes. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 15 minutes passed and she was still in the bathroom. Finally after 20 minutes she came back to her bedroom and told him she had a surprise for him. Because he was such a nice guy she wanted to do something special for him. She said that she spent all the time in the bathroom picking all her scabs and draining the puss from honey hole so she would not hurt him. :smiley:

ewww gross and an old joke. I heard it as “corncob” Sally because she used a corncob to clean and sand uhm area.

racer72, that is hideous. Thank you for that imagery.

As for the question posed in the OP; I suspect my wheelchair would be a pretty sucky place to attempt copulation.

COVERED IN BEES!!!

with that hairy oily guy in Austin Powers 3.

I can’t believe nobody’s mentioned this yet…

“That’d be in the butt, Bob.”

With Fat Bastard.

In a vat of live worms.

in a barrel full of Icy Hot

in the mall during Chirstmas season

with a rabid grizzely bear.

With Englebert Humperdinck!!!

:stuck_out_tongue:

with a mace covered in the most painful spikes ever invented, and a few fish hooks embedded in it- barbs out… covered in hot sauce… after you’ve been thoroughly sandpapered raw.

I want the man that could still maintain interest after being subjected to the Mirrored Indingo Shadows treatment, cause that would be one hell of a man.

That was exactly my though. I mean if I’m going to freak someone nasty there better be corn served!

U dreaming Austin Power 3!!! Where when and how ??
;_)

U dreaming Austin Powesr 3!!! Where when and how ??
:wink:

In a threesome with T. Herman Zweibel.

With JDT supervising.

In PRISM02s store.

For that matter, Arnold store wouldn’t be much better!

With heatherlee.
edited by UB to fix URL tags

LMAO think, I had forgotten all about that thread and Arnold’s skillful hijacling thereof. Too funny.

But as for heatherlee–I’ll never know. The link doesn’t work.

And JDT–he knows things, that’s all I’ll say. He knows things.

Also my thoughts exactly. :smiley:

LOL!! Can I please have permission to use this as a sig?

Ok I give up, who or what the hell is Smoove B???

lol… Mermaid, Smoove B is one of the many regular columnists for The Onion. He tries to come off as a total playa/ladies man, but in reality he’s a very low budget and long-winded playa-wannabe. If you go to the Onion’s archives you can read most of his columns. They’re quite, quite funny.