Some friends of ours are having their first baby in January. They are the first of our group of friends to have a baby, and we threw a shower for her. We all got to talking about how the shower is a great celebration for the women, but what about the new dad?
I guess we could do a couples’ shower, and I know they are becoming more popular, but shouldn’t there be a guy equivalent, like the bachleor party before a wedding - like a celebration of fatherhood or something? The guys want to get together and do something, but what? It seems like a nice idea for them to have a tradition of their own.
Any ideas? Guys, did you feel left out of the baby shower experience? Did you do anything to celebrate with your guy friends? If you could do something, what would it be?
Our friends just did a couples shower for us this weekend and it was incredible. I can’t tell you how much it meant to me and how touched I was. They actually did part of it as a game show where everyone was competing to be the “Reality God Parents” It was hilarious! So as a guy I felt totally included and couldn’t have asked for more. My wife is also having a traditional shower as well. Which I can skip and go see a movie…perhaps Kill Bill???
Well, that’s what I mean. It doesn’t have to be a ‘shower’, but it would be nice if there was some kind of tradition. I don’t think anyone is suggesting to just take the regular baby shower and throw it for men.
But isn’t there something that would be fun instead of a shower? I mean, there’s the bachelor party for weddings, and no one thinks of those as feminine.
I think our friend is feeling like there is no ‘congratulation ceremony’ for the dad. Maybe they should all just go golfing or something, but that doesn’t seem very baby centered. Isn’t there anything that could celebrate a new baby for men that’s not considered feminine?
I think this is an interesting idea and a way to extend the celebration to the father. I mean, it seems weird in this day and age for all baby-related things to be mom centered, no?
StGermain, was it a traditional shower or was it changed to be more ‘masculine’?
moi, that’s what I think, too. Maybe they could just get together and forgo all the shower-type things. Just a celebration because hey, he’s having a baby and it’s exciting!
I don’t attend many showers, but I imagine, being a work event, it was mostly refreshments and gift-giving, with no stupid games attached. Honeslty, I didn’t attend - David works in IS, I work in Credit, and although our work so etimes brings us into contact, I blew it off. I do know his wife was invited to attend, too.
A couple of my good friends had a baby once and they did something I thought was pretty cool. They had a regular shower for the mother-to-be and her female friends and relatives, and while that was going on, the husbands/boyfriends of the women all went to a bar to eat fried foods, drink beer, and watch baseball.
It was a great time. It got us all out of the way so the women could have fun, and we got to enjoy ourselves for the afternoon, too. Nothing brings a group of guys together like fried food, beer, and sports.
Huh? You mean it’s still supposed to be a women only thing? Never heard of that except in maybe 1950s movies. Weird. All my friends had couples events, after all they’re BOTH having a baby!
Probably the best game was sculling beer from baby bottles, and the worst was the baby food taste test guessing game.
Baby showers are hell on earth. EWW, AAHHH. Men only come to them (in a work environment) when they are promised food. Both parents should come to one shower, and get it over with fast. None of those silly “first person to say baby loses their little freaking diaper pin” games, please! Provide alcohol, above all.
And I have children - imagine how those who don’t feel about baby showers!
I like coordinating a “diaper dump” on guys at work in leiu of a shower. Everyone brings in one pack of disposibles, stack them in the cube. The guys appreciate the thought, and the other guys seem to participate because coming into work to find your cube stacked with diapers is funny.
But outside of work, we are another group that goes for couple showers. If the guys want to do something, why not figure out what they want to do and do it? Doesn’t have to be baby related (as guys generally take a few months to catch on after the babies have arrived). If there are other kids around, a dad/kid thing may be fun - initiate the new dad into fatherhood by all the dads/men/kids going to the zoo, while the moms/women play stupid shower games. If there aren’t other kids around, the guys could still do something along the lines of going to the zoo.
I’m with Blonde. If having a couples shower cuts down on the pink ruffles and silly games, I’m all for that.
As for a special ‘guy-type’ event, why? Babies don’t care who’s burping them, changing them, or pointlessly shaking little rattles in their screaming little faces when they’re colicy.
Men should go to showers because they really might not know WHY a baby needs two dozen onsies.
Velma…the shower my friends threw us was not feminine by any means. It was all of our friends gathered together to party. There was booze, food and good times had by all. The majority of our friends are guys and the party was actually planned by a guy. So the idea of a shower for both of them doesn’t have to be girly…it is what you as the friends make it.