Battle of the Bad: Click v. Just My Luck

Drive-ins are great. Two movies for the price of one. The ability to talk through the boring ones without bothering others. The ability to adjust volumes on the car speakers. Tubs of popcorn you could swim in.

But they also, at least in my life, tempt me into going when I shouldn’t. When the movies are obviously going to be very very bad.

A few weeks ago, it was “Just My Luck.” This movie was very very bad.

Tonight? “Click.” This movie was very very bad.

One involved the horror that is Lindsey Lohan. The other involved the horror that is David Hasselhoff. One has Christopher Walken but he’s cancelled out by the horror that is Adam Sandler. One had a dogshit joke. One had numerous doghumping jokes. And fart jokes. And skinflap jokes.

I defy anyone to name two worse movies they’ve seen in 2006. Actually, I’d be impressed with just one.

“See No Evil”. Next challenge, please…

Fah. I’ll see your piddling choices with Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Family Reunion and raise the stakes with the badly aging Matthew McConahay and Sarah Jessica Parker in Failure to Launch.

Adam Sandler needs to stop already. He just should just be content to retire on a tropical island and build a beach house out of his huge pile of money.

And if Sandler stops making movies and moves away, it means Rob Schneider will have to stop sleeping on Adam Sandler’s couch and will probably wind up dead on the street. I can support that.

Drive-In? In 2006? I didn’t realize that such an animal still existed.

I’m so glad they still do! It’s a great way to take kids to a movie, and not have to worry about whether they’ll bother anyone, sit through it, whatever. Nearest drive-in is about an hour away, but we go at least every other week all summer.

If his looks are starting to fade, who better to star in a movie with than SJP?