Dude, whatever you do, don’t ever have a baby. Not ever.
Well I don’t particularly like babies and toddlers that much but I like teenagers. They often like things like Facebook, movies, gossip, etc. At the moment I tutor my wife’s niece in maths and I find it rewarding. I’m interested in dealing with “mind games”, etc. Even though I don’t like babies and toddlers that much they would probably grow on me (I like kittens a lot though)… and I’d feel good when my wife is enjoying herself with them.
So making my wife feel devastated and not allowing her to have a life-long dream and possibly divorcing her even though we mostly both feel fine is in my wife’s “best interest”? She gets upset enough with theoretical problems like that I might leave her (she worries about that sometimes). She would get highly traumatized.
Well her parents are already looking after someone’s 12 year old girl… and my wife’s brother wants to have two kids (he’s getting married in a few weeks) - they could help look after the baby.
Ha! I don’t know why, exactly, but I was actually looking for the “like” button when I read this post! 
Ok. Obvious is obvious. I’m out.
My wife’s mother thinks she should only have one kid. My wife’s brother and soon to be wife like the idea. My parents initially thought it would be a bad idea but now say that I should think very carefully about it.
We sleep in the same bed like most married couples.
Also it feels better.
Hey, wait for me…
You strike me as a guy who tries to be honest - and has issues with the lies that society tells and how other people put a spin on things. For example, your - shall we say realistic - view on love.
You should develop an equally realistic view on raising a kid.
You are totally screwed if you have a kid.
Your kid will not bring you happiness and you are deluding yourself if you think it will or can.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with you wanting to be with a low maintainence sex machine. I can see the appeal for going for the low hanging fruit - and it doesn’t sound like you are being dishonest with her. This is totally the opposite of what you are considering here.
Do
Not
Have
A
Kid
Ambivalid:
I seriously want a reply to that post I directed towards you…
I already have happiness, more or less… I sometimes dislike my job though or am in some physical pain. It is my wife who thinks a kid will bring happiness. I think it would give her a lot of happiness though it might not make her happier overall due to some problems.
I doubt it. We’ll see… most people on this messageboard thought the relationship with my girlfriend wouldn’t last and my marriage wouldn’t work…
Low hanging fruit?! I think it is quite rare to find one a sex machine like that… and one that I’m attracted to - I wouldn’t be attracted to a girl that had fat in other areas as well such as the arms and face. Or a girl that didn’t have a cute face/hair. Overall she’s a 5 due to the belly but she has a cute face. Long term relationships need stability - it might be somehow possible that I could get in a relationship with “high-hanging fruit”… but that doesn’t mean I’d be content in the long term. People get used to beauty - maybe why about 50% of married people cheat.
??? I still don’t want to be dishonest when it comes to having a kid…
I have no problem believing the relationship with your wife will work.
I don’t mean low hanging fruit as an insult.
And as far as the ??? goes - I mean low hanging fruit - not the honesty part.
Look at the studies on kids and happiness. While it provides greater life satisfaction in some studies - there is a lot of unpleasantness there too.
If you were your friend - would you really look at your situation and say “I think you should have kids”? How about if you were your wife’s friend?
You can always leave your wife. She can always leave you. You don’t realistically have that option with a kid.
And a kid sounds like much higher maintenance than your wife.
Have you discussed the two of you getting a mediocre dog instead?
It’s a great present for a surprise birthday party, too.
You’ve already shown you have absolutely no respect for your wife. To raise a child in that atmosphere, would in my view, constitute emotional abuse.
I tell I love her a lot. I’m trying to give her what she wants (a kid). She felt really happy at our engagement party and she said she didn’t feel mentally unwell at all during the wedding. (She gets anxiety fairly often). I don’t think those things would be true if I had “absolutely no respect” for her. I could go on about day to day things but your statement isn’t accurate. “absolutely no” is a very black and white statement though perhaps you aren’t concerned whether you statements are accurate - perhaps you prefer to make a strong point.
I’m a cat person. I hate most dogs. Also she definitely wants a baby.
nm
Hey, it doesn’t have to be a good dog, not one of those frou-frou show dogs or anything. Those are pretty sought after, and you don’t want to aim too high, you’d just be setting yourself for disappointment. I’m not talking a dog that you’d have to take for walks or pet or like or anything. Just an acceptable one, maybe it has low self-esteem or something, it’s been abused and is just happy to have a roof and food and not be kicked and stuff.