Behold, the power of cheese!

Bwahahahahaha! Asshattery
She wanted to become a model? I know it’s a mug shot which is not flattering at the best of times, but looking at the picture, honey, you ain’t all that. Maybe she was an aspiring hand model. What is it with some people nowadays? It seems like every couple of days there is another story about some fuckburger who wants some stupid thing and decides that the best way to get it is to kill someone. Naturally they are caught, BECAUSE THEIR PLAN WAS MONUMENTALLY STUPID, yet when their pictures are shown they always have that how-did-it-all-go-wrong-it-was-a-perfect-plan? deer in the headlights look. Can people really be that dumb? I guess the answer is yes, but it makes me wonder, how do they even function in the world? Seriously. I honestly don’t know how someone with a thought process so screwed up that they think this is a good idea can even use the toilet without drowning or breaking their neck then the lid shuts. The real tragedy is when one of these aspiring rocket scientists does manage to kill some poor innocent sap.

That headline is truly a classic for the ages:

“Model Accused Of Hiring Hit Man To Kill For Cheese”

It delves into the surreal and attains artistry.

Oh, but man, that is really, really good cheese.

Worth killing for no doubt about it.

I bet that cheese would make some killer nachos.

From the article.

Really? Amazing. The things they will do with cheese now a days.

Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase, “Cheesecake model.”

My Og. There is clearly only one punishment befitting such a heinous and stupid crime: she must snort the cheese.

This needs to be made into one of those California “it’s-the-cheese” commercials. Maybe that can be her big break into stardom.

<wallace>
She’s just crackers about cheese!!
</wallace>

There’s a slightly longer version of the story here

:smack:

A rap song?! Christ. If she were into the whole literary reference thing (which I strongly doubt,) she could name it In Cold Cheese.

I came in here to say that… And being from Wisconsin, you should probably know that, too…

Just imagine if her plan had succeeded and when she went to cut the cocaine, she’d’ve only ended up cutting the cheese …

I’ve only ever seen queso fresco used for cooking, as opposed to just noshing on. Maybe people do eat in hunks, but I’ve always had it cooked or prepared some way. Sort of the Latino velveeta. Being generous, maybe that’s what they meant.

This thread is no gouda. I’m moving it to MPSIMS

Cheese it! The cops!

Setting the cheese aside for a moment: She needed $7,900 to pay a modeling agency. That just screams rip-off.

This girl deserves a life sentence for stupidity.

(bolding mine) but then wouldn’t she be msitaken for a Native American?

She wanted to be a model 'cuz it’s all about the cheddar.

Y’all go ahead and make cheese puns 'til you’re blue in the face.