“Free tramapoline!”
“Sax-a-mo-phone…”
“To alchohol! The cause of–and solution to–all of life’s problems!”
And I think this is from the same bootlegger episode:
Marge: Homer! What exactly are you up to in that basement?!
Homer, pushing wheelbarrow full of booze-filled bowling balls: Marge…I’m not going to lie to you.
And with that, he simply leaves the house.
“To alcohol! The cause of–and solution to–all of life’s problems!”
And I think this is from the same bootlegger episode:
Marge: Homer! What exactly are you up to in that basement?!
Homer, pushing wheelbarrow full of booze-filled bowling balls: Marge…I’m not going to lie to you.
And with that, he simply leaves the house.
D’oh! Sorry!
Here’s another:
“Marge, you make it sound so seamy. All I did was spend the afternoon in her trailer watching her try on some outfits.” - Homer on his time with his country music protegee, Lurleen Lumpkin
“Ohhh. SideSHOW Bob”
“They don’t call me Colonel Homer Simpson because I’m some dumbass army guy”
Hurry Marge, less artsy more fartsy!
“So I says to him, you want your money, well you can come and get it, cause I don’t know where it is, you baloney! You make me want to retch!”
Can we go home yet?_ My feet hurt… all this fresh air is making my hair move… and I don’t know how much longer I can complain.
Then, I will hug some snakes…yes! Then, I will hug and kiss some poisonous snakes. Now that’s sarcasm!
“Homer, are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
“I think so…”
“You can run…but you can’t GLUIDE!” (Homer fantasizing about attacking a crowd in a laser-armed hang glider)
I’m just going out to… commit certain deeds.
Marge: Homer! You said you got rid of the gun.
Homer: But I put it in the vegetable drawer. I figured no one would look there.
M: Homer, you aren’t going out stalking again are you? you know how I feel, its so illegal
H: No Marge, i’m just going out…to…STALK…Lenny and Carl…d’oh!
“Did you ever see that Blue Man Group? Total rip-off of the Smurfs. And the Smurfs – they suck!”
Dear lord…please guide this cinder block [throws cinder block through the hull of Judge Constance Harm’s boathouse]
Marge: homer were out of beer do you want some fruit juice?
Homer: don’t toy with me woman
about principal skinner. “possible homer-sexual”
In the episode where Marge turns out to be a witch and sends bats after the town:
Homer: They’re in my hair, they’re in my hair!!
DAMNIT, someone stole mine.
Anywho, here’s another one:
Barney’s film had depth and heart, but the football in the groin had a football in a groin.
Lisa, could you open the window. The police have Daddy’s fingerprints on file.