“He’s so ugly he looks like someone set fire to his face and beat the flames out with a shovel”.
Discuss.
The award-winning http://porkypies.tripod.com
Lying - it’s not big and it’s not clever
She fell outta the ugly tree,and hit every branch on the way down.
You forgot the rest of it:
and when she got up, she tripped over the stupid stick. Twice.
Favorite Aggie(Tx A&M Univ. student) putdown:
Did you ever hear about the aggie that was so stupid, the other aggies noticed?
You are more than a human being, you are a human becoming.
Og Mandino
That’s my name, not a description. I am neither purple nor a bear. Okay, so I’m purple.<a true Wally original!>
Troll.
Brithael bites.
Homepage: http://www.bigfuckinboatwithbadassplanes.mil
Occupation: Swabbie Pounder, First Class
Location: Anywhere you feckless landlubbers ain’t.
Interests: Navy Chow, Port of Call, The Head, Air Superiority
ICQ Number: CVN69 – An UncleBeer Profile
“Avast and ahoy, landlubbers! Shore leave’s in August. Hide your women.” – A WallySig
I actually used this next one, and only the person it was directed towards didn’t get it.
“Boy, if I was gay, knowing you would turn me straight.”
-BrainWeasel
Squeaks from BrainWeasel’s Cage
http://brainweasel.home.att.net
No, really, I understand, you’re doing the best you can.
Tris
Imagine my signature begins five spaces to the right of center.
“May the fleas of a THOUSAND camels nestle in the hair of your crotch!”
“I fart in your fathers beard!”
(an old Muslim insult, if I recall correctly)
“I will build a ladder from the bones of your ancestors, and climb into your mothers bedroom window to rape her!”
(either Catalan or Bask, I forget)
Defect borg:
“Refutile is sistance. Your ass will be simulated”.
WallyM7 on Coldfire:
"Yeah, he knows a little about everything because they have a good prison library."
“You’ve got a face like a bulldog licking piss from a nettle!”
Of all your father’s sperm, the fastest, hardiest one resulted in you?
“He’s so dumb, he could fall into a barrel of tits and climb out sucking his thumb”
“That’s a nice outfit. Does it come in your size?”
feeling someone’s suit jacket
Nice fabric. Ever think of having it made into a suit?
=====
You mean out of millions of sperm, you won?
=====
Did one of your brain cells die and leave the other all by itself?
=====
He can’t even spell IQ.
Wrong thinking is punished, right thinking is just as swiftly rewarded. You’ll find it an effective combination.
For girls: (as posted in Coldfire’s thread by me, made by me, and 100% Sqrlerific)
Putrid producer of human caviar!
For boys:
Flatulant flinger of hillbilly ejaculate!
HUGS!
Sqrl
How about these:
Why don’t you get a job as a speed hump in a car park?
Why don’t you put a cow’s c*** on your head and get a bull to f*** some sense into you?
If you don’t shut up I’ll put my hand in my pocket and strangle your twin brother!
Your family tree is a cactus - it’s full of pricks.
Knock softly but firmly, 'cause I like soft firm knockers…
“Hey, the jerk store called, and they said they’re out of you.” --George Costanza
I don’t have any insults better than the aforementioned ones, but I do have a zinger that stops the insultee in his/her tracks.
“Eat my discharge”
Works every time.