No , I don’t. I have only my experience interacting with public defenders and Legal Services lawyers in Appalachia. The number one request for legal need among the poor was divorce, a service that Legal Services did not provide. Inability to get divorced resulted in further complications.
Divorce should be a functional administrative process, If there is not contest. In my state even an uncontested divorce takes six months to a year. It should be instantaneous.
Because they were at one time committed to each other enough that they expected their relationship to last a lifetime—or, at least, that’s what they promised. As long as such promises are made, I don’t think you can completely normalize divorce.
I also think that a wedding it a public declaration of commitment. The point of that is to make it harder to end the relationship. The public is part of the deal. Thus, if you’re ending that arrangement, it should be news for the same reason the wedding is. You have to publicly declare that the contract has been ended.
That said, I agree that it shouldn’t be any harder for poor people to get divorced. I think it makes sense that there be some level of hurdle to breaking the commitment, but that hurdle should be the same for everyone.
Or we could just move on to fixed term marriages, with an option to renew. Then it should be as simple as letting people know you’ve chosen not to renew.
You can’t or you prefer not to?
Most religious orders (nuns) take perpetual vows after a period of training and discernment. A nun who leaves an order like that needs a dispensation from The Pope and everybody between herself and The Pope.
The Daughters of Charity of St. Vincent de Paul renew vows annually. (Back in the day, they wore the white cornet–see picture.)
Its members make annual vows throughout their life, which leaves them always free to leave, without need of ecclesiastical permission.
Might be an interesting option for some marriages.
I was reading yesterday about a trend for some couples (same sex and opposite sex) to marry with the sole intention of forming an official household/domestic partnership, with no intention of being sexually active with each other. But that’s another thread…
The institution of marriage has functioned in different ways over human history.
We would probably need to restructure shared assets in the marriage if we went to such a system. Right now assets and debt are shared and need to be split up during a divorce. But this could probably work provided the couple managed finances in a way to make it clear who gets what in a split (e.g. stuff in one person’s name goes to that person and joint assets split 50-50). Having kids would greatly complicate things and probably would mean having to do a traditional divorce. This is especially true when one spouse stays home to provide childcare based on the promise of the other spouse to continue working and saving for the couple’s joint retirement. The working spouse shouldn’t just be able to walk away with their full salary and retirement and the home spouse has to start from scratch.
Bill discovered that Melinda had secretly bought an iPhone.
Six months to a year is way too long- but it’s never going to be instantaneous, not even for the relatively small number of cases where the parties don’t need any assistance in coming to agreements regarding property and custody. Even for those cases, someone is going to have to review the paperwork.
An uncontested divorce is relatively cheap in my state - every married couple I know that has split up without an actual divorce has done so because at least one person didn’t want the divorce for reasons for some reason that had nothing to do with the expense of a divorce* or the state of their actual relationship. You can actually file the paperwork for an uncontested divorce without a lawyer and pay only the filing fees.
Isn’t Microsoft out of the phone business?
In a situation like that it seems to me that a unilateral divorce should be permitted.
Snarky one liners contribute nothing to any conversation. I made an argument. You can choose to engage or not, but please don’t use this sort of rhetorical trickery.
I, for one, had no idea that Bill Gates married Tracey Ullman. But why did she change her first name too?
“His” net worth is not $124 billion and she is not going to “take” any of it. After thirty years of marriage, those are joint assets to which she is entitled an equitable distribution.
I was surprised to hear this news given how they both still seem to share the same goals and mindset. Of course who knows what goes on in their personal lives, or what issues lie between them. It’s rare to see such long marriages break up, but I wish them both well. Covid has been hard on many people. No doubt the grass can sometimes seem greener to many people.
There is no truth to the rumour Bill was caught cheating with the “I’m a Mac” dude.
My cite is my life. Is that sufficient?
Perhaps. Jeff Bezos and his ex-wife didn’t have a pre-nup either (and they were also Washington State residents) but she received only 25% of his Amazon shares. We don’t know why that is but perhaps it was enough that he wouldn’t fight it in court endlessly? So really we don’t know how Bill and Melinda Gates will divide their fortune.
Should we make divorce easier, or should make it harder to get married?
Depends on the laws and formulas for assets in each state. They’re residents of Washington, I believe, so whatever their laws are will probably apply.
I know that. As I said, though, in the case of Jeff Bezos’ divorce (which was a similar situation), MacKenzie Scott walked away with 25%. These things are subject to negotiation.
I think it’s mildly sad. They once had a love for each and now they don’t; I don’t think there’s anything wrong with lamenting love lost. They seem to be handling it maturely. I note that the youngest child is 18; I wonder if they were waiting for her to go off to college.