cmyk
October 11, 2015, 7:07pm
121
Can’t Satan itch and twitch us too? How do I know who’s doing the tickling?!
I’m scared!
I guess it occurs in the back of your mind, and you have to actually believe the thought and submit it to God before He will answer with a signal. And even then He usually won’t, due to the factors I listed. He wants us to walk by faith, which is not to have a perfect knowledge of things. If God kept a running commentary constantly of all our thoughts and actions, we’d all go bonkers. It took me years to map out what I listed in post #1 .
Good question. That’s why the outer manifestation of the signals can only be a supplement to the inner witness of the Holy Ghost, which reveals the truth of all things (Moroni 10:3-5).
Snark_Hunter:
I guess it occurs in the back of your mind, and you have to actually believe the thought and submit it to God before He will answer with a signal. And even then He usually won’t, due to the factors I listed. He wants us to walk by faith, which is not to have a perfect knowledge of things. If God kept a running commentary constantly of all our thoughts and actions, we’d all go bonkers. It took me years to map out what I listed in post #1 .
It sounds like the whole scheme is utterly uselesx then (I mean, if it existed at all even in the form you are describing)
Oh, I have no doubt that it can change the world and help confound all false doctrine, reaching everything from communism to the Nicene Creed to atheism to terrorism and much, much more. These things take time.
Snark_Hunter:
Oh, I have no doubt that it can change the world and help confound all false doctrine, reaching everything from communism to the Nicene Creed to atheism to terrorism and much, much more. These things take time.
But it is an imaginary phenomenon, so I don’t think it can change my mind of what I want in my Crunch Wrap Supreme, much less have itches result in world peace.
It isn’t imaginary; it’s just very subtle.
Snark_Hunter:
Oh, I have no doubt that it can change the world and help confound all false doctrine, reaching everything from communism to the Nicene Creed to atheism to terrorism and much, much more. These things take time.
And if it doesn’t work, it’s because the person trying it didn’t have enough faith, right?
I have a scheme whereby humans can reliably levitate, that works on exactly the same principles.
I don’t know. I wish I could answer you definitively, but after all, I didn’t invent them. I’m just a humble student of them.
Who else believes in this? Can you provide cites that it is a figment of many peoples’ imaginations, not just yours?
I can only think of two others: a former seminary teacher of mine who taught me the “nose = choose” signal, and a grocery clerk who told me to watch my ears.
You were told wrong. It’s “choose your friends but but you can’t pick your nose” and the clerk was telling you to wash your ears.
Did the clerk also tell you to lick your elbow? Because I think he may have just been winding you up.
And just how do the Mormons fit into this picture?
Lobohan
October 12, 2015, 6:21pm
135
Snark_Hunter:
First of all, let me explain what I mean when I refer to the Theory of Body Signals. It isn’t a scientific theory, but rather a spiritual one. I’ve been observing and analyzing the body signals for decades now, and I like to think I understand what they signify and their potential to change human behavior.
The theory goes like this: God is able to communicate with all mankind not only through personal revelation, prophets and the scriptures, but also physically through certain “signals” which manifest as itches, muscular twitches, cramps and pains. These signals are not God’s primary means of communicating with us, His children, but are rather supplementary in nature. He doesn’t expect us to watch every little itch or twitch and try to decode them, but they are helpful in letting us know His will in general and work out our problems.
Here, then, are what I consider to be the most important body signals:
Left side of the body symbolizes evil Right side of the body symbolizes good Legs symbolize thoughts Arms and shoulder blades symbolize actions Left ear symbolizes God’s justice Right ear symbolizes God’s mercy Cheeks mean God didn’t say that Nose means choose
For example, if I think an evil thought, my left leg may itch or twitch. If I believe something God didn’t say, one of my cheeks may itch when I reference that belief in my thoughts. If I am kind to others, my right ear may itch or pulse. And so on.
…To be continued…
I have the answers you need:
God doesn’t exist, so He doesn’t talk to you in any way, especially not in mysterious signals.
That’s pretty much it, actually.
I presume they get body signals too but they ridicule me when I mention them.
Do you think the special undergarments are involved somehow? Or is it coincidence? I am inclined towards the latter.
ETA: I only inquired along these lines because you’d cited the book of Moroni earlier.
Crap! How’d you know I am Mormon? And where was the tickle that tipped you off!?!
Qadgop_the_Mercotan:
Do you think the special undergarments are involved somehow? Or is it coincidence? I am inclined towards the latter.
ETA: I only inquired along these lines because you’d cited the book of Moroni earlier.
I’m not a temple Mormon, so I don’t know much about garments; I’m an inactive recluse.
cmyk
October 14, 2015, 12:37pm
140
Snark_Hunter:
Oh, I have no doubt that it can change the world and help confound all false doctrine, reaching everything from communism to the Nicene Creed to atheism to terrorism and much, much more. These things take time.
I love this.
It can reach atheism, but in order to be reached you have to have faith.
That’s absolutely rich.