No offense to the OP
But if you called me on the phone and talked like you posted here, would wouldn’t be able to sell me sex for $0.25
Honestly, it resembled a bad day at google translate.
Everybody has better drugs than me. 
I hope today is the day off cause he got his hands on the good stuff.
Hope OPs hangover wasn’t too brutal. Also, I am stealing the quote above.
Sorry to hear you got laid off. I hope it’s a VERY temporary state.
The exact point at which my sympathy dried up.
Get away from this line of work ASAP. I bet you could use your sales skills somewhere else, make better money, and not annoy people on the phone.
Well, obviously the reason for the slow sales is that he only calls people who LIKE talking to telemarketers.
Come now, didn’t you understand “just extended my existence eastward. Plant corner where, roughly?”