And how would we react if we’d seen this?
“…I’ve left a billion voice mails trying to find out what the hell I did wrong, and she won’t even return my calls. Nice, hey?”
Dump him. Apparently, he deserves better.
Congratulations on the new job!
See, you get that from a complete stranger. One should always be supportive of their friends’s successes, and especially of those of their significant other. You are not being an unreasonable bitch. You accomplished something great, you should go out and celebrate, not sit there being pissed. So go celebrate without him, have yourself a grand time, and treat those who do recognize your accomplishments to a nice meal (you could just send me five bucks for mine, unless you’d like to visit Austin, I don’t mind either way 
).
One thing though: If you do stay angry with him, and he asks “Why are you being such a bitch?” LET HIM KNOW!!! Don’t pull one of these “I don’t want to talk about it,” or “Like you don’t know” kind of things. As has been said, people need it spelled out for them sometimes, and if he’s too clueless to offer up a “Congratulations,” then he won’t understand why you’re angry. So tell him why you’re angry, tell him you’re dissapointed he didn’t share in your enthusiasm and joy, and make him make it up to you in a very big way (making him wear a French Maid’s uniform while you take photographs would be a good way, I think).
Once again, congratulations.
Ah… It appears that underhanded attempts at manipulation and passive-aggressive dishonesty are indeed your thing.
Before pulling out the manipulative and passive aggressive branding irons for MusicMistress, can we consider that perhaps she hasn’t called him since the incident because she was trying to get enough distance from her initial hurt/disappointment/anger/resentment to allow her to deal with him in a mature way? This happened on Monday. It’s now Wednesday. This isn’t that big a thing. Geez.
‘Sorry attempt’ nothing, pal. You’re completely on point. MusicMistress, I’m glad you came back and gloated about how poorly you’re treating your man, because I was starting to feel a little lonely being the only one sticking up for the guy!
This is actually just another of my ‘me too’ posts where these posters are concerned. At least this one is a three-fer: Manda JO, Kabbes, and Hamadryad are all totally right here. Booya!
tlw, she openly admitted that she’s doing it to get back at him! And that she knows it’s cruel! What more do you want, man??
She’s so upset that she can’t let him know she’s upset? That doesn’t make a lot of sense.
I don’t entirely understand what the problem is. You told a guy something and he started talking about himself. Is this honestly your first experience with something of this nature? Now he’s asking you what’s wrong and you’re giving him the silent treatment (ohhh BURN!) I suppose he’s not invited to your slumber party now either. :rolleyes: You’re taking a situation that wasn’t very bad to begin with and making it 100x worse.
No, i’m not trying to be manipulative and I am not just trying to be cruel. I’m trying to sort out my own feelings before I call him, otherwise it will just start an argument. In my opinion that would be a million times worse than ignoring his phone calls for a few days.
For those who have asked, this isn’t the first time this has happened, but it is only been a regular occurance in the past few weeks. I did ignore it the first few times, thinking it was no big deal, but I blew up on Monday because I had reached the end of my rope.
I do plan to phone him tonight and talk.
First of all, I am not now nor have I ever been a man, and even if I were you don’t know me well enough to address me that informally.
Second of all, MusicMistress openly admitted no such thing. She said “I haven’t called the bastard back since the incident.” That’s all, nothing else. What thread are you reading? If I weren’t well aware that it would be a useless pursuit, I’d suggest that you owe her an apology for attempting to put negative words in her mouth.
Er, tlw, you left this bit out:
What way of reading that do you have other than using the silence as a weapon?
pan
I think this is the nub of your problem here. Avoiding direct conflict leads one to use silence as a weapon.
A more efficient way to resolve differences is to be open and honest about one’s needs. The word “argument” can mean “constructive negotiation” as well as “scream-fest”, you know. It is possible to explain your needs and express a degree of dissatisfaction or annoyance without yelling at each other. Try it. You might like it.
“First of all, I am not now nor have I ever been a man, and even if I were you don’t know me well enough to address me that informally.”
<utterly OT> Get over yourself…“man” has been used informally in that sense with men AND women for years. And if the pit is anything it’s informal, duuuuuuuude.
</UOT>
Well, I guess my brown-nosing got me somewhere, because kabbes and Hamadryad covered pretty much what I had to say to you, tlw. Sorry if I offended you with my informality. I’ll be sure and remember not to address you again.
‘If I weren’t well aware that it would be a useless pursuit, I’d suggest that you owe her an apology for attempting to put negative words in her mouth.’
Speaking of passive aggressive… If you have something to suggest, suggest it. I don’t owe MusicMistress an apology, neither did I attempt to put any kind of words in her mouth. I interpreted what I thought was a pretty clear post on her part, in a way that apparently differed from the way you did. I don’t owe her an apology for interpreting her post any more than you do.
Also, if I don’t know you well enough to address you as informally as with a rhetorical ‘man,’ you sure don’t know me well enough to be ‘well aware’ of anything about my character. So you can take your snap judgements and stow 'em.