You are a braver man than I.
I salute you.
Dibs on your computer when you’re gone.
The title of this thread is misleading. It sounds like CalMeacham did something to defy death. . . like he escaped it somehow. I was waiting for the death-defying story. But that’s not how the OP reads.
The title should be “CalMeacham Taunts Death”.
Whether he defies it or not still remains to be seen. I’m not hopeful. 
And to show her appreciation, Pepper Mill got this book for Cal.
Cal has not returned to the thread. I fear the worst.
Hey, uh … anyone claimed his DVD collection yet?
Three things that I have learned in life…
Never attempt to guess a woman’s age.
Never attempt to guess her weight.
Never ever comment on her ass. ( you will always lose no matter what ) She can have the most perfect ass on the planet and still ask you if it is better than so and so’s ass. sigh
Defying death is easy. Staying alive afterwards is usually a tad more difficult.
“…Cal was not a rich man, but he was a good man, and until yesterday evening we believed he was a smart man. Let us think of him as we knew him in life: as a man who loved his family and gave generously to his community, who made us laugh and made us smile. Let us not remember him as the investigators say he died: roasting in agony after all 272 pages of that book had been jammed down his throat, with the book’s spine ripped in half and shoved forcefully into his ears, with writhing body throw into the oven on high for two hours, cooking on the inside and out as the pages burned inside him and a mixture of lemon juice and what the police say may have been charcoal and lighter fluid boiling around him. That was not the CalMeacham we knew. CalMeacham was a good, kind man.”
The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.
Pepper Mill has no animosity, and even made me dinner tonight. I checked for ground glass and known poisons, and there were none.
My theory is that, if I give her a book like this, it proves that I DON’T think her bottom is excessive, or else I wouldn’t dare do so.
Of course, it could be that she’s just still sore from the surgery, and is just biding her time. We’ll see.
And I’m keeping the computer, the DVd collection, and the stereo.
I quote Cedric, from my favorite movie of all time, Ivanhoe, speaking of a letter from King Richard: “Written before they killed him.”
What about your CDs? They’ll get stolen in the hospital.
I’m apparently safe for now. Pepper Mill still hasn’t read the book.
And she says that SHE has dibs on the computer, DVDs, and Stereu. And the CDs.
dammit.
Remember, folks, that, in many localities, those who commit murder are not allowed to profit from their crimes. There’s hope for it yet.
Issac Parker wouldn’t find her guilty.
I barely escaped with my life showing the link to the young, beautiful, gorgeous, generous, Mrs. Plant. I told her I figured if I sent it to her my life would be, “What, 30, 45 seconds?”
She responded, “Three.”
she’s watching me type…
And the fourth rule: Never assume a woman is pregnant unless you can actually see a baby emerging from her body.
Well sure, but this is totally justifiable homicide we’re talking about, right?
And do we know that this is really you? How do we know that this isn’t Pepper Mill impersonating you to divert suspicion?
Iocaine powder. It’s colourless and tasteless.
It has been my experience that attempting to use reverse psychology on women will almost always backfire because women themselves would be expecting precisely the opposite. Your attempt at outwitting her by giving her a gift whose obviously stated intention is the opposite of what you intend for it to mean would therefore be canceled out by her expectation that you would do that very thing as a veiled attempt to mean precisely what the gift implied, so clearly you cannot choose the wine in front of you.
Wait…
We need to devise a question only he would know, something she can’t look up on the web.