Zenster - Tom Berenger. OK, hear me out on this one. Ever seen Rustler’s Rhapsody? Tom plays Rex O’Herlihan a good guy. I mean a parody on a good guy in a spoof about Westerns. This guy is kind to the ladies, always wears white, always a perfect gentleman, and, when in a fight, shoots the guns out of the enemy’s hands. He never shoots the enemy because he’s the good guy and good guys don’t do that. Yup, that’s Zenster all right.
TVeblen – Meg Ryan. Why? Because it’s my list and I can choose any damn person I want to play Veb and I choose Meg. So deal with it! Oh, and one of my female friends said Meg is hot and if she could have a lesbian affair with anyone, it would be with Meg. This has nothing to do with Veb, but I thought I’d share. Well, OK, fine, I’m thinking of Veb with my friend but you have to understand it’s all for the good of the board.
Wildest Bill – Randy Quaid as Cousin Eddie from the Vacation series.
Ed Zotti – Ralph Richardson. He played the Supreme Being in Time Bandits. You know, that giant head that followed everyone around and every word was echoed and reverberated The Law?
Silent Bob – Kevin Smith. Must I?
Chief Scott – Gary Shandling in What Planet Are You From? The alien was suave, intelligent, vastly superior to all of humankind. But he never got much done because he took orders from his vibrating penis.
Eutychus55 – David Learner/Stephen Moore. They played Marvin the Robot from Hitchiker’s Guide. He’s cute and cuddly and everyone can’t help but fall in love with him even when he’s feeling depressed. “Move this thread, Marvin.” That’s what they say to me. “Warn this troll, Marvin.” "Marvin, can you read this flirt thread and see if its appropriate? Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and they ask me to read a flirt thread.”
Jeremy’s Evil Twin – Kevin Spacey from Se7en.
