I am female, if that makes a difference, as well as one of those forward thinking and non-judgmental types. Also, your behavior and your social/religious practices are none of my business- I am simply offering to make an appointment with a doctor: nothing more. I can also call and speak with the two of you to explain the procedure at the health department. Details only, and no big deal, I promise.
Listen, Sweetie- though the people who are teasing you are likely more comfortable with the act of sex, they are being honest about the importance of preventing sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. Sex can have heavy consequences if you are conservative and/or relgious: both physical and spiritual. The moral crisis you are describing sounds very serious, so you must… ***must *** change your behavior and live according to the morals that you both subscribe to.
Get the answers you need, learn from this experience, forgive yourselves and become better people when you get through it.
But for now, see a doctor, and let someone help you if need be.
The sooner you use the morning after pill the more likely it is to work, with the ideal being to take it within 72 hours after the “accident”. However, it can still do some good if you take it even up to 5 days after the accident, as described on http://ec.princeton.edu/questions/ectime.html
So, I still think you should try to get it ASAP to hopefully help reduce whatever risk there is that she might be pregnant. Other than that, I agree with the advice to talk to someone about family planning even if you don’t intend to have sex again anytime soon. It is way too easy to get excited and go further than you intended, and you definitely don’t want to end up in this situation again!
Good luck.
Though you may have received some sexual education from your public school, I would seriously suggest you go even further than that. There’s a book that I would describe as a veritable sex bible called The Guide to Getting it On you should really go out and purchase. It’s about 800 pages in length and can tell you just about everything you’d want to know about anything even related to sex.
It’s very well written too, so reading it doesn’t feel like a chore.
unbrokenpp. Asking sex questions on SDMB is a bit like asking about what it’s like in space. You’ll get a bunch of good answers from people who have read about it…
Yes. More educated is gooder.
You can also do many things with your girl that don’t include regular penis/vagina sex. Oral sex is fun. Handjobs are fun as well.
Also, you should get on the jerkin’ train. Go buy a porn movie, some lotions and spend the next few weeks spanking the monkey. Learn a bit more on how your bits work. It’s fun, feels good, and helps pass the time if you’re bored.
At the risk of hijacking this thread, which is not my intention . . .
You stuck this in the middle of an otherwise-excellent post, and I can’t help pointing out that sometimes - especially for college kids - it’s the moral premises that need to be questioned and, if need be, adjusted.
Ah. This probably isn’t the right forum for me to express anything but a neutral viewpoint, but here goes: I feel pretty strongly that fear and an apparent lack of information and experience puts both parties at risk of concealing an unwanted pregnancy (or an untreated STD) and could lead to his being too ashamed/embarrassed to ask for help. Thankfully family planning is free and available to everyone regardless of their upbringing, and I happen to know a little about the ins and outs of utilizing these services. My opinions and feelings about sexuality have no bearing on the OP’s request for information about matters of sexual health.
Having said that: Fear and ignorance about the human body is the first obstacle to overcome on the way to developing a healthy attitude towards sex. Hopefully, once that hurdle is cleared, and both parties are ready and willing to experiment without shame and fear- the OP can explore just how much fun sex can be. (And in case you were wondering where I come from: in my imaginary perfect world, morals are determined by the individual, not any governing body.) If the OP returns after taking care of the necessities, we can hit IMHO to discuss the awesomeness of sex.
You’re probably fine.
The problem with making this gamble isn’t that you’ll lose, the problem is that if you lose the price is catastrophic. Shouldn’t gamble anything you can’t afford to lose…
BTW, someone mentioned Planned Parenthood and I’d say that’s definitely the place to go for tests/information/whatever – I’m assuming you’re on your parents health insurance. If you go to your regular doctor you will either have to pay full price or have it put on a statement that your or her parents will see, but Planned Parenthood will help you out. Learned this the hard way in high school…
Hi unbrok3npp. I know you’re scared right now, so saying something like this is easy to say. But nuh-uh. That door is open, and you two obviously feel like expressing those urges. People make mistakes, so naturally, people make mistakes with sex. Listen to what everyone else has said about encouraging you and your girlfriend to be open about what your feeling and try to think of ways to express the feelings you two have.
Also, I wanted to add that there is a huge distinction between morning after pill (or Plan B) and RU-486 (the pill referred to as the “abortion pill” by the pro-life movement). Some people have strong negative feelings about abortion and have confused the two. If your gf didn’t pursue plan B for these reasons she wouldn’t have to worry about that.
Another vote for start wanking now. Think of all that catching up you need to do.
Shoot- who among us hasn’t had a pregnancy scare or embarrassing question about sex? I was just thinking how nice it would have been to have a sounding board this anonymous and diverse to discuss such personal issues with when I was younger.
Keep your head together, unbrokenpp, and take advantage of the resources and advice everyone has shared here. Read through both the humorous and earnest replies and realize that sex is a fun adventure, but next time you both should be emotionally mature enough to partake responsibly. Promise us all that you will learn from this experience, realize the redundancy of your username, then enjoy your relationship. You are on the verge of the best years of your life.
Not directly pertinent to the OP, but I think this might be different depending on the individual, because I took it a few months ago and was fine. I had my period within a few days of taking the pills (which is only odd because I rarely have my period; maybe twice a year) but after that, nothing.
I just graduated this year, and there ain’t a damn thing in this thread that I didn’t learn at school back in eighth freaking grade (usually the lessons were repeated, no less!)
Did you graduate from the same school district as the OP? I graduated high school in '03 feeling adequately educated about safer sex, but I realize that my education has nothing to do with what the OP received. Different states have different standards, even when it comes to something so basic like how to use a condom. We can’t judge the OP’s education based on our own.
For the sake of the OP’s peace of mind. When can you trust a negative result from pregnancy test administered by a doctor? How long do you have to wait before she takes it?
In my opinion you have failed to give us the key information. You have taken a risk but how great the risk of pregnancy is can’t be determined or even guessed at as you failed to tell us your ages.
If you are both college age then you’ll never be more fertile than you both are right now. Go get tested. If you’re both in your thirties I’d decrease the risk considerably.
( I was a pregnant teenager, pulling out is not birth control, and is does only take one time! )
