The Christian, or the atheist? I’m a reasonably devout United Methodist. I attend church every Sunday, I sing in the choir, I play in the bell choir, I serve on two committees. I don’t pray every day, or read the Bible regularly, or get involved in a Sunday school class, or go on retreats. But I do consider my faith to be important to my life, and I would like to find a man to be in a relationship with that feels the same way. My ex-husband was nominally Christian, but hasn’t been to church since our son was baptized. I was fine with that when we were married. It really didn’t bother me that he stopped going to church, and most of the time he was too hung over anyways (whole 'nother issue!).
That all being said, I think I would have no problem being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t believe as I do. I would respect that someone had made a choice based on their experience and study, and while we might have a few lively discussions, I wouldn’t disparage them for their choice. Many, many, many of the women in my church have spouses who do not attend, and I’m sure quite a few don’t believe. And their relationships work. Having the same level of faith as I do is not a requirement for a good relationship.
But from many of the things that have been posted here by atheists, I feel that many atheists would be less accepting of a potential partner who is a believer. I hear a lot of put-downs of the faithful, and a ton of disparaging remarks about the intellectual level of Christians. And I think that sort of “smarter-than-thou” attitude would be more of a deterrent to a solid relationship than the actual difference in belief.
I have an online friend who is very atheist, and he is constantly surprised by his relationship to me. He spends most of his time with pagans, and had some very definite anti-Christian beliefs that apparently I have shaken his perception of, and even though he will still come out with a very prejudiced anti-believer comment, he respects my belief. And he has noticed that I never once have disparaged him for his non-belief.
So how many Dopers have a mixed relationship in this regard? And how many atheists here feel they could never, ever, have a relationship with a Christian, even one who isn’t a fantical born-again evangelical? Do any of the Christians here think they could never have a lasting relationship with an atheist? And what about the other religions that are represented here?