I’m in the habit of bringing my lunch to work. Ergo, I often bring something that needs to be refrigerated so I plunk it into one of 2 fridges on the floor here at work. Yesterday, around 1 PM I head to the breakroom to grab my grub. I innocently opent he fridge to snag my vittles when I notice a green soda can.
“Hmmm,” I think to myself, “Must be Mountain Dew or Mello Yello. I wonder which one it is. Oh wait, it says Dr. Brown’s on it.”
Thumbing through my mental filing cabinet, I realize Dr. Brown’s makes a pretty darn good cherry cola I have enjoyed, so naturally I would be curious to try a citrus flavored beverage they would put out.
I reach in and grab the can (not to steal it from a co-worker, just to see what the exact flavoring is for future reference) when I see the 6 most horrifying words I have ever come across - Celery Soda with other Natural Flavors.
Oh good God. Why would someone choose to make a carbonated drink based on celery? Even more baffling, who in their right mind would ilke that drink so much they would be willing to bring it to a public workplace? There is nothing sane or logical about this concept. Might as well make pork flavored ice cream or radish yogurt. There are certain flavors that should never, ever be mass produced into a buyable product and celery is absolutely one of them.
Of course, the scary prologue to this story is that the can is now gone which means someone I work with now has this vile product running through their digestive system.