Coldfire's sig line

“You know how complex women are.”

Any posters have stories to share (try to limit yourself, this has the potential to go on forever) as to the truth of this comment?

Here’s mine:
Friend of mine breaks up with her boyfriend, who’s in his late thirties. She’s in her early thirties and thinks she’s old (her hair is a little gray). She goes on and on about his bullshit, finishes venting, etc. I tell her “Well you’re too young for him anyway.” Couple days later she leaves a message on my machine for me to call her, she sounds a little pissed. I call. “What did you mean by that comment that I’m too young for him? Are you saying I’m immature?” (It was meant as a compliment dammit!) She now finds this as ridiculous as I did. A happy ending after all. Suspect many subsequent posts won’t have one though.

No, I don’t know how complicated women are. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

I’m complicated, but my husband and I have worked around that. Everything’s his fault. I lost my sunglasses, his fault of course. I forgot to mail something, his fault. All and all, it’s worked out rather nicely.


My best friend was dating and later living with a guy that was a total loser. He was not working, he didn’t help her out around the house, he was a mooch! I couldn’t believe that she would put up with it, it was so much NOT like her.

Another good friend of ours lived across the street from her and noticed that people were coming and going at weird hours while she was at work. When she asked him about it, he confessed to selling dope while she was at work. She finally figured out this guy was no good and immediately kicked his sorry ass out the door.

One day she calls me on the telephone and tells me that she has something to show me. She comes over to my house and pulls out a wad of money (over $17,000.00) that she found under the corner of her matress. It hadn’t been there a few days before when she had changed the sheets on her bed.

We decide that the best thing to do would be to put the money back and see what happened. It disappeared. A few days later she found $13,000.00. We figured out that her ex was sneaking into her house and hiding drug money, so she called the cops.

For the next month and a half, she worked closely with the NARC agents. They were already scoping him out when she notified them.

A bunch of things happened.


(This story really is too long to type)

Anyway, to make a long story short, they finally had enough evidence to bust him. He knew that something was coming down so he went over to her house and was in the process of gathering up the drugs he had hidden. As planned, she called the NARCs and gave them the code word. Within minutes, her home was surrounded and they arrested both him and her (they didn’t want him to know she was involved in catching him.)

There was so much drugs pulled out of her house (in the cellar), that it was mentioned on the news as being one of the states largest busts.

This girl could have won an academy award with her acting.

So, he gets arrested, she testifies as an anonymous witness, he posts bail and awaits his court date. End of story.


She comes over one day and tells me that she has something to tell me. She tells me that her and this guy went to the courthouse and got married the day before! I laugh, yeah right, but then she shows me the ring and I know that she isn’t joking. I damn near shit myself.

At least she came to her senses, two weeks later she filed for an annulment and never saw the guy again (this was 9 years ago).

I never did figure what the hell was that about? I don’t think she even knows.

If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.

I’m not complicated.

I’m high maintenance.


You’re all high maintenance. (But usually worth the expense.)
The strangest case of the inscrutable feminine mind that I have ever seen involves a pair of co-workers.

When she was hired, she was Ms. FemLib (in the best way). She was not a man-hater, but she did find men to be rather silly. She simply demanded to be treated as an equal and always pulled her own freight.

She began dating another co-worker and eventually they married. The next thing we know, she goes wierd: She can’t work late because he needs his supper cooked on time; when it is suggested that he cook their meals if he gets home first, she confides that he really can’t manage that on his own; when it is suggested that she bring home a Stouffer’s meal–she is contracting at Stouffer’s at that time–she admits that she did that once, and he raised an eyebrow to indicate that that was not proper wifely behavior.

At work, she continues to take no guff from anyone; at home, he is the lord of the manor.

He is a nice enough guy, but nobody has ever figured out why she has decided to let him make all the rules in the house.


I have a story similar to tom’s. I had a female friend who was so liberated and independent I assumed she was going to blaze through life just tossing men aside left and right. She finished college and decided to waitress for a year to raise money before she went to law school. And in the process would bring home assorted characters for sex as she saw fit. She started seeing one regularly and after a few weeks it turned out she was pregnant. I assumed this was the result of some freak accident because I’d seen her birth control pills lying around and I knew that, having majored in AIDS healthcare, she’d never have sex without a condom. I went with her to Planned Parenthood to speak to a counselor where it was eventually revealed that 1) she quit taking the pill because <guy> didn’t like it, 2) she LET him not use a condom because HE didn’t like it, 3) he got her pregnant on purpose because he wanted to marry her and her knew she was too liberated and independant to marry anybody but thought she’d change her mind if she was knocked up. At this point I almost have to put my head between my knees to keep from passing out, but the kicker was when the counsellor asked how she planned to raise the baby if she had and kept it, she replied: “Well, <guy> is going to take care of me!” She ended up having to have an abortion for medical reasons, and I thought everyone would come to their senses; instead, she dated the guy for like another year and they ended up getting married anyway… and are still married. My mind still reels whenever I see them. I don’t think I could be that, uh, “complex” if I tried!

oh how weird…instead of using a guy’s name I used the word “guy” in the greater-than, less-than signs and it left it out entirely. The instances should read:
She quit taking the pill because “guy” didn’t like it
“well, “guy” is going to take care of me!”

:frowning: Takes a little “zing” out of the story, I fear

I wholeheartedly agree with Jazzmine. It’s all my husband’s fault. He’s a nice guy, and a smart one, so he accepted this long ago. We don’t even argue anymore. :smiley:

I’m flattered my sig line provoked so much thought :wink:

Well, I could give you one billion examples of women, my SO in particular, being complex.
Let’s just say it all boils down to her venting every frustration she collected over the past three weeks on ME, then when I ask what the hell I have done, tells me “to better THINK about that before just dumbly asking her to explain the obvious to me”. Often followed by telephone slammed back into its holder.

Happens every 28 days or so… it’s the weirdest thing :wink:


“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)

As a woman, much of the silly behaviour many of you have mentioned makes me sick. These women give a bad name to womanhood.
IMHO, my equality applies across the board, not just at my convenience. Otherwise intellegent women who make assinine choices, manipulate men through tears and/or sex, or who want the right to take care of themselves but not the responsibility piss me off more than any other group of people I can think of.
Ah, I feel better now.

“I think it would be a great idea” Mohandas Ghandi’s answer when asked what he thought of Western civilization

      • I met a girl working the night shift at a gas station. I got off from my job between 3 and 5 AM and stopped by once, and then again and again. I kept hanging around, because she was cute and didn’t ever tell me to leave. We did go on a couple of casual daytime dates; she had two jobs and a kid and not a lot of free time.
  • Eventually she told me that she was abused by a first husband a few years earlier, divorced and moved back home with her parents, and then somebody molested her 8 yr old daughter. Mostly we just talked, sometimes we’d hold each other, sometimes we’d make out. Sometimes she wouldn’t let me touch her, and wouldn’t talk to me at all. It seemed like these nights were happening more and more often, so I figured she changed her mind and I stopped coming by.
  • I learned a year and a half later from a mutual friend that she did want me around - she never told me to leave, but she didn’t want me to touch her or talk to her. - ??? - MC


she probably wanted a free body guard or something. No seriously, I’ve had a girlfriend too of whom I think she was abused, but she always told me she couldn’t possibly share that with me. As I was unable to help her with the problems resulting from her ‘dark secret’, this relationship was obviously doomed, no matter how hard I tried. Get this: this girl would not let me go down on her. That’s right ladies, you read the words, she did not like me to perform oral sex on her. And God knows I’m quite the Cunning Linguist :wink:
She thought it was ‘too intimate’ or something. The relationship ceased to be after 5 months or so. Moral of the story: people who are blocked and can’t share their deepest secrets with you (for reasons that can be quite understandable, don’t get me wrong), are never the ones that will give you the satisfaction of a deep relationship. Sad as it is, it is the truth.

And Lucky,

I’ll forward that piece of text of yours to my girlfriend, OK ?? Let’s see what happens…


“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)


She’s not going to come and beat me up, is she?

“I think it would be a great idea” Mohandas Ghandi’s answer when asked what he thought of Western civilization

Naah… she’ll probably except from YOU what I’ve been trying to get into her brain for two years now :wink:


“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)

Lucky, I’m with you. I’m not high maintenance OR complicated. I know this since my boyfriend is constantly astounded that I’m not. He’s been with difficult, high maintenance women for so long he didn’t realize there was another kind.

But, I agree, there’s lots and lots of women out there who have not realized that equality goes both ways. If SHE’S trying to work out a problem with her boyfriend and wants time to think about things, and HE keeps calling her, HE’S not “respecting her boundaries” and is “smothering her.” Flip that scenario around - HE wants time alone, SHE keeps calling. All of a sudden HE’S “emotionally unavailable” and “doesn’t respect her needs.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard variations of this story from women, even those I call my friends.

Coldfire: I’ve refused to let guys go down on me before. Didn’t have anything to do with intimacy. Had more to do with 1) I don’t like it that much (!), and 2) most guys think they’re GREAT at it. Most guys aren’t. This isn’t pointed at you, I haven’t had the pleasure of (ahem!) sampling, but I thought you might want to know that some of us out there prefer other things.


Your point is well taken. From my experience, all women seemed to like it (ah well, from the 10 or so I had sex with) except for that particular one. So it stood out.
And errrrrm, not to boat, but I’ve been TOLD I’m good at it. Or maybe these girls were even faking their damn COMPLIMENTS :slight_smile:
About that sample, well… my girlfriend’s complex enough to be really anal about that sharing thing and all…

Oh, and in my last post, please replaced “except” by “accept”. Sorry 'bout that.


“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
      • Regarding “convenience store girl”: I kinda wondered about the reason she let me stay around, because the store was one of those with a bullet-proof glass booth around the cash register, and bullet-proof glass in the front windows, with a electric-unlocking door that could only be unlocked from inside the register booth, while its door was closed. And I did see her basically tell other guys to hit the road, while I was standing there.
  • I couldn’t imagine wanting someone around just to ignore them (still can’t, really) but I did learn something about listening - I just learned it one-and-a-half years too late. :stuck_out_tongue: - MC

There’s your problem right there. It’s not the boat but the little man who rides in it.

If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.

Athena, thank you! I thought maybe I was the only one that thought there was a lot more fun things to do. I’ve never liked it much myself.