Bah, I wrote in dialect. Your challenge, figure out which one.
Umm… well, it’s not Moroccan. Am I right?
It’s not fair to post in dialect anyway, Collounsbury.
Well, we could feed you his current location (not on Fathom) if you really want to get your blood pressure up a couple dozen points. < eg >
[sub]The preceding offer was a joke made in the expectation that Col really wants no such opportunity and it is not extended to any other poster. Inter-board wars are bad.[/sub]
Nope, not Maghribiya which would read:
Ama falakhrine khousousa Celest. wa Biggirl, Ashnou bghritou minni? Ash ghrangoulik amam koul hadak nas? Moukin ghranjblikou she haja baseeta halb bibliografiya 'an al-'aounsouriya wa maowqif al-arqiyaat fi masra wa al-'alam al-'arabi youm ma.
Great, now I have to find not only an Arabic speaker, but a dialectic Arabic speaker.
[sub]toodles off toward the Arabic dimestore…[sub]
Not happy with the flames so far, smart boy? Heh, here’s something you can sink your teeth into:
You know squat about pickled cabbage!
You know, I had this girlfriend a while ago and we had found a pattern for a French Cheesemakers Smock in a collection of historical clothing patterns and we talked a lot about her making it for me and finally we bought some really nice raw silk fabric and she made it for me but she didn’t do a very good job on it and kind of screwed up the collar and it didn’t fit very well either but I still wore it and liked it because I really loved her but then it turned out that she was fucking this other guy that I knew and then she just dumped me like a piece of shit and that hurt like hell so FUCK YOU COLLOUNSBURY YOU WANT TO BE A CHEESEMAKER THEN JUST EAT SHIT AND DIE YOU CUCKOLDMAKER YOU PIGFUCKER
JDM
God, that was great, JDM.
All I know is that Colunsbury is really really really gonna piss me off if starts posting in Chinese (any dialect).
Collonsbury’s hard disk is highly fragmented.
Collonsbury doesn’t always floss like he should.
Collonsbury isn’t good at bribing gatekeeping bureaucrats. He always winds up paying more than he should.
And his name is damned difficult to spell. Correctly.
Yeah I agree. I’m constantly stuffing up his name when I refer to his posts. Extra "u"s, extra "o"s. Why couldn’t he have come up with an easy name to spell? Bloody inconsiderate.
You know what I really hate about Collounsbury? He makes the rest of us look like ignorant gits. Bastard.
What the hell is going on here? I put in a pit thread and it turns into a lovefest, with both men and women who should know better fawning over someone who they most likely never met, just because he writes on a message board so well. For all we know he could be some American Psycho or a bored housewife who is a fan of mystery and intrigue literature and interested in current events.
Grr…all my pit threads become virtual orgies. Why, why, why???
Because you haven’t figured out how to get your posters together for a real orgy?
ElvisL1ves said:
Oh, you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. You really don’t need Collounsbury’s help.
Oh, sure, like you contributed. I think I’m the only one on the thread that really (almost) legitimately got under C’s skin with my ‘dimestore German’ post. I consulted a native German speaker, and dug up the dirt that C’s (and yes I’m sick of misspelling his name, so I’ll just stick with ‘C’ in this thread) apparently erudite German is pigeon. And C takes umbrage. Cool. Yo! A win! wooo! Get over it, C, it’s The Pit. I sooo rock.
So: it just takes some research and a good topic. Go forth and make fun of his laptop or something. It can be done.
(Yes, I know Collounsbury {there, I said it} will shred me. In another thread. On another topic. When I least expect it. And he’ll be dead on-target with devastating accuracy. And I’ll feel like the worm that I am. It was still worth it.)
{{{pennylane}}} Thank you for offering to translate that Arabic spanking Collounsbury posted, even though it looks difficult. Oooh, I can’t even figure out how to PRONOUNCE it, much less decipher any meaning from it. I suspect it’s just some gibberish words he conjured out of thin air rather than any real dialect of Arabic. [sniff] So what do you have to say to that, Sugarlump? Come on, talk dirty to me some more.
[celestina runs over to squeegee and gently pinches then plants a light kiss on his? cheek]
You’re so cute and really a Sweetie too. Do you know that? From your name to your attempts to tease Biggirl and make me jealous of how attentive Collounsbury’s being to her in this thread to your diggin’ up the goods on Collounsbury’s [giggle] dimestore German. Keep up the good work, hon. You might could just get into a good ol’ wrasslin’ match with him yet. 
Oh, and capacitator, what are you so upset over a little ol’ virtual orgy for? Make love, not war. That’s the best way to live, darlin’. 
Thanks for the appreciation, celestina. You’re very kind. [sub]*blush[/sub]
Right, like I’m that foolish. I’m much more the managerial sort:
(Feet on desk, clenching trademark big fat cigar, gesturing lazily at the masses of ill-informed yet fully-opinionated illiteratti) “Collounsbury, please dispatch these…these… (hmmm!) people. In your usual style, of course. We’ll await you at your convenience.” (Reaches for TV remote, carefully adjusts top hat.)
Now, if I can just find a native dialectic Arabic speaker, this guy is toast…
Volunteers?
I know what it means.
[sub]whizzzz whizzzz whizzz[/sub]whizzzz whizzz whizzzz whizzzz WHIZZZZ WHIZZZ WHIZZZ WHIZZZ WHIZZZ WHIZZZ WHIZZZ RRAAAARRRAARRRGH THBTBTBTB!!!