- A la green fried tomatoes! *
You now have a billion American dollars, but due to inflation you need double that to get a cup of coffee and a bagel.
I wish Calvin and Hobbes were back in the funnies. New C&H, that is.
^^^Ala-ka-ZAAAAMMMMM^^^
Calvin & Hobbes are back in the funnies – the new Calvin & Hobbes.
“New” meaning, Calvin is now 35 years old, a failure at every job he’s ever held (isn’t there any employer who enjoys murdered snowmen in the parking lot??) and in therapy. Hobbes has been reduced to a fist-sized scrap of bedraggled cloth, and Calvin’s therapist is working on getting Calvin to give up his childish toys and illusions and learn to fit in.
I wish Bloom County would come back.
Krys92gp wished for a big mansion…
(what?? No sound effect???)
You now have a big mansion… a HAUNTED mansion… in which you are trapped, unable to ever leave… and the constant moaning and clanking of chains and the shrieks of the damned souls are driving you mad… MAD, I tell you!
I wish for what I always wish for… infinite, God-like, omnipotent power!
Brrrrrrrringgg
Your 1992 Infinity and your impotent powers are all yours (your genie is hard of hearing)
I wish I was 21 again…
I really ought to invest in some fake eyelashes…
third consecutive Jeannie blink
You are 21 again…in dog years.
I really ought to invest in some fake eyelashes…
third consecutive Jeannie blink
You are 21 again…in dog years.
I wish for raspberry cheesecake…
You now figure prominently in lurid “cheeescake” photographs spread all over the internet. You are covered in raspberry sauce in these photos.
I wish I was faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound! LOOK! UP IN T^HE SHY! IT’S A BIRD! IT’S A PLANE! IT’S SUPER-BOSDA!
SWOOOOOOOOOSH
Super-Bosda it is! Flying high above the city, soaring, looping, mistaken on radar screens for a terrorist and shot down by heat-seeking missiles. Was it fun while it lasted?
I still wish Bloom County would come back.
(I thougth Bloom County was coming back.)
Poof! Bloom County is back. Unfortunately Berkeley Breathed “updated” it and it is now it is a “serious” comic that no one ever reads.
I wish I could teleport to anywhere, anytime, whenever, and wherever I desired with the stipulations that I can’t teleport anywhere that I will be able to harm myself directly (like the bottom of the ocean or center of the sun) or indirectly (like teleporting 1000 miles into the sky and having the fall kill me or in front of a speeding train).
Wheeeeeeemmmmmmm
You can teleport! You arrive where you wanted to go!
That is, your atoms arrive. One after the other. Takes a day or two for them all to get there.
I wish men could experience hot flashes. 
BANG
men can now experience hot flashes but they use tehm for enegy and become unbearably hyper
I wish EddyTeddyFreddy would tell me the secret that isnt a secret but actually is a secret
>WHOOSH!!!< Men now experience hot flashes. However, in order to distribute the now unused testosterone, women wind up farting and burping more, pee while standing up, and leaving the toilet seat up.
I wish I was hung like a black guy.
Whammo
Yup, you’re hung like a black guy, all right – iin the heyday of the KKK, from a sturdy oak tree.
I wish I could get my work done.
Oh, and BigDaiv:
poink
ETF reveals the secret about her and Angua, which so horrifies all who hear it that their reason is unhinged and they spend the rest of their cyberlives babbling in the Pit.
I still wish I could get my work done.
Pling “You CAN get your work done, you just need to work harder and stop skiving off back home for sleep, weekends, etc.”
I wish I could spell
Poof! You got your work done, but you did such a terrible job that you’re fired. No one else will hire you, based on your previous performance, and you are forced to live on the streets, never to work again.
I wish I could eat as much food as I want and not get fat.
you can spell only badly and you can eat as much food as you like but you get a mental problem which prevents you from wanting to eat
i wish for an orc
- A la liver and onions! *
You can now cast one spell, but it’s only for turning your hair green.
I wish I could have multiple orgasms.
Horseflesh, baby! You got all the orgasms you want – but you’re making love to BigDaiv’s orc. BD, you get to raise the offspring.
I’d like a glass of Cabernet right now.
Pop! Ting! Glug, glug, glug.
Here’s a beautiful, hand-cut, lead crystal goblet brimming with Cabernet. Cabernet water. Yes, fresh, clear water, straight from the Cabernet region of France.
I wish I had gone to all those concerts back in the 70’s.