poof
Your cats develop the magical ability to clean, taking care of the dusting and vacuuming. However, they do it so well, they begin to get violent with anyone who leave any sort of mess whatsoever, including leaving that cup of water on the counter while you go to the washrrom. When you get back, you face a group of angry cats, who shred you to pieces.
I wish that the temperature here in Regina was over -20 Celsius.
the temperature in Regina is now over -20 Celsius. But her boyfriend, a regional boxing champion with an attitude problem, doesn’t appreciate you messing with his girlfriends anatomy. So he is going to mess with yours. He replaces and renovates some of your organs. Well at least you are in a warm hospitalbed now.
I wish sayoz306 has the best looking nurse in the hospital
Sayoz306 (<hijack> Where does that name come from, anyway? </hijack>) has the best looking nurse in the hospital. Unfortunately for poor sayoz306, that just means that the nurse has all of his teeth, and his face doesn’t quite look like he uses a blender as part of his daily skincare regimen.
I wish EddyTeddyFreddy would give me my joke back. Feed it to the cats?! The very idea!!
Sayoz306 (<hijack> Where does that name come from, anyway? </hijack>) has the best looking nurse in the hospital. Unfortunately for poor sayoz306, that just means that the nurse has all of his teeth, and his face doesn’t quite look like he uses an eggbeater as part of his daily skincare regimen.
I wish EddyTeddyFreddy would give me my joke back. Feed it to the cats?! The very idea!!
Oh, and I wish I could spell xayoz306’s name right. Feh.
>< >< >< hack hack spew >< >< ><
One vomitted joke coming right up. It looks and smells kinda funny; covered in some kind of mucous and the remains of a few furballs. I aint touchin it.
Um… you sure you still want it Scribble?
I wish my lawnmower could fly.
whirrrrrrrrrr
And j_sum1’s lawnmower can fly! Look at that baby soar as, in a fit of absentmindedness, j_sum1 misses the turn at the end of the lawn and zooms right off the retaining wall! That’s quite an impressive drop to the brambles at the bottom of the hillside, eh?
I wish my horses would clean their own damned stalls once in a while.
poof
Your horses do clean their own stalls, and dump the mess righht in your living room, in protest for you making them clean their own stalls.
<hijack>Xayoz is a made up word. My meaning is chaos</hijack>
I wish I had a star to wish upon.
You now have your very own wishing star, only it’s in your backyard and the extremely high temperatures instantly vaporize you.
I wish for all boy bands to be stranded on the Moon without any breathing devices.
flooopp
all boys bands are stranded on the moon without any breathing devices. but as a reporter you are sent with them to cover the story. It goes without saying you do have a breathing device.
That means all the boysbands force you to give them air. Have fun doing mouth on mouth on all of them.
I wish for a chocolate bunny mansize.
hophophippityhop
Your wish is granted! You now have a chocolate bunny that’s mansize. You place it in the center of your living room, where you can nibble at it whenever you get the urge.
You go to bed that night, tummy full of chocolate nibbles, looking forward to the next morning’s delights. Alas, during the night the heating vent next to the bunny malfunctions, sending blast upon blast of hot air upon the chocolate figure.
Next morning, you run downstairs for more chocolate and discover to your horror that your entire living room floor is covered with a three-inch-thick layer of chocolate; that the pets have walked all over it, trailing chocolate pawprints throughout the house, and that at least one pet has thrown up all over the place.
I wish I had a cinnamon coffeecake.
ploof
Your black boyfriend who you call “coffeecake” as sweetname has covered himself in cinnamon. Hope the cinnamon will cover up the bad taste.
I wish I could get the reward for saddams capture
{{{ HEADLINE, BELGIAN INTERNATIONAL HERO, FIRST TIME EVER }}}
sportshoe you gain national and international acclaim for the apprehension of Saddam Hussain. You see through his cunning dissguise only after you finally get the girlfriend you have been dating for the last three months into bed, and discover that (s)he is infact Saddam and has been hiding out in Belgium in disguise for the last few months.
I wish the Christmas cards I sent to England get to their destination on time.
P.S. of course the guy they caught in Iraq was just Saddam’s clone called Sod’emall Hussain.
zzzzzip
Your Christmas cards reach their English destinations on time and in pristine condition (I know you didn’t ask for that, but his geniiness is feeling generous today).
Alas, you probably shouldn’t have sent one to HRH, the Prince of Wales. With his wife long gone, the kids grown up and leaving home, his “matey” scared into hiding by recently publicity, the old girlfriend tired of hearing him pronounce her last name “bowels”, and mama showing no sign of turning over the family business for another twenty-five years, Charles Longface is in need of a friend. Your (un)timely Christmas card to him captures his attention (and his desparate need for attention). So he starts following you around day and night, anywhere and everywhere, softly mewling for attention, any attention at all. You soon learn the meaning and origin of the phrase “a Royal pain.”
I wish these visions of sugar plums would stop dancing in my head.
*jigjigjigjig
Those visions of sugar plums stop dancing in your head, BJMoose. Now they’ve turned into realities of stale fruitcake that you were desperate enough to eat when you were trapped in an elevator for six hours, and they’re dancing their way through your digestive system. Don’t go to far from the bathroom for a while, eh?
I wish the cook at my Mom’s assisted living place doesn’t put diced red and green peppers in the stuffing for Christmas, like he did at Thanksgiving. Looked pretty; tasted… :eek:
CrumpCrumpCrump
The pepers are no longer In the stuffing, they ARE ALL THAT’S IN IT, oh and did I mention they were mexican red chilli’s?
I wish I could go out and drink tomorrow with out making a fool of myself.
*** plopplopfizz*fizz ***
Drinking isn’t what turns you into a fool tomorrow – you make a fool of yourself while completely sober.
I wish that yesterday’s snow / slush storm covered the mid-Atlantic states in a giant cherry slushee drink, instead of the plain slushee that we actually got.
Twinkle, twinkle
You’ve got cherry slushee. The streets are covered in cherry slushee, the cars are covered with cherry slushee, and your boots, coat, hat, and gloves are covered in cherry slushee. And the stuff stains. Permanently. Pity you chose to wear your nice stuff today, isn’t it?
I wish my labmates were nicer.
blatz
your labmates are nicer. They are so nice that they do all of your labwork for you… Too bad when test time comes, you have no idea what is going on and you flunk out of college. Which your mum and dad mortgaged the house to pay for . In turn they lose the house and all of you wind up living in a homeless shelter in the Bronx.
I wish my tidy whities would come clean