Sorry. I should’ve made it clear that that the plane fell on the train.
Gooooooder One!
Done; though not in the true spirit of the game, the genie now has Alzheimer’s and you’re screwed – every time.
I wish I had a buffalo head nickel for every corrupted wish ever and they’re not glued together or buried under cement.
Ah. That’s better. Thanks.
Easily done. I’ve just erased every corrupted wish from existance, including this one. You are now owed nothing.
I wish I could turn invisible at will, and just as easily become visible again.
Poof Done, but your friend will (he prefers to spell it lower-cased, like e.e. cummings) is getting a little annoyed. He wonders why you only do this around him.
I believe I can fly… and I wish I could.
Congratulations, you are now capable of flight at will! All the classic personal-flight elements are yours: You need no special equipment (as long as you go no higher than 8000 feet over mean sea level), you can move about at will, your power never runs out, and so forth!
Too bad you can never land, nor touch the ground, nor touch anything that (recursively) touches the ground again.
I wish to unsummon the Wish Djiin.
He disappears in a poof of white smoke, only to be replaced by the Wish Ifrit, who appears in a poof of black smoke.
I wish that the Wish Ifrit would grant me the power to know who are the drunk assholes on the highway, and thus avoid them (perhaps with a floating hologram of a martini glass which hovers above their roof).
Granted. All of those floating martini holograms on weekend evenings prove distracting to other drivers, who collide in a massive pileup that you can’t avoid, either. EMTs use the Jaws of Life to extract you from your car, but it’s too late.
I wish I had my own personal Jaws of Life tool to show off for my neighbors.
Your neighbors are suitably amused at the way you managed to get the thing firmly attached to your scrotum–well done!
I wish my dog didn’t fart so much, while still remaining alive and healthy.
Granted. Each and every fart is replaced by dog vomit, most of which ends up on your favorite furniture.
I wish my DVD player didn’t break last night.
Your DVD player didn’t break last night, but your house burned down.
I wish firefighters weren’t quite so idolized nowadays. It’s an important job, and I’m glad they do it, but they’re not demigods.
Done. They are now despised by all. They are so hated that they all quit their jobs. That’s probably why my house burned down.
I wish my crazy asshole next door neighbor would follow the damned court order and plant some nice trees.
He plants some nice trees. They grow quickly but, in a huge windstorm, fall over the crisped ruins of your burned-out house, crushing it.
I wish Bach and Handel had met and become good friends.
They became such good friends, that they spent all their time hanging out together in taverns. Once they met, neither of them ever wrote another note.
I wish I could quit smoking and not from dying or because I came down with some smoking-related illness.
You do quit smoking, but then start chewing.
I wish I could do more to help the ones I love.
You help those you love so much that you become cloying and clingy, and they grow to resent and even hate you.
I wish those damn kids would get off my lawn.
The flood that comes up onto your lawn takes the damn kids away. And your damn house.
I wish California would legalize gay marriage so my sister the lesbian and her partner could make it legal after having 13 years and two daughters together.
California legalises gay marriage, but not lesbian marriage. They can either move or change gender.
I wish I didn’t feel so rotten for posting this. 
You’re made to feel redeemed when someone here starts a thread “Why I Hate Cats – In Suits” However, because of the popularity of the thread, an obscure law is uncovered for where you live (passed in 1806) barring Cats from wearing Suits and levying heavy fines and jail time for such breaches.
I wish I were more clever.
You are now the cleverest man in history (or fiction)-Sherlock Holmes, 6 seconds away from being dashed on the rocks of Reichenbach Falls.
I wish Sherlock Holmes was a real person in the present day, amazing everyone with his crime-solving skills as he nabs crack fiends, child molesters, and serial killers left and right.
Holmes could do all that, but most of it lacks any sort of hook, and, without that hook, he won’t do it. Besides, he’s currently serving a sentence for drug possession.
I wish that ambergris was free for the taking.