Unclebeer wrote a profile for ChiefScott that was hilarious. Even the Chief likes it.
Copycat that I am, I made one for Demo. Dud.
Anyway, I bet if you ask nicely, Unc will make a custom profile for you as well. Just drop in here and post your request.
Here’s a sample of UncleBeer’s work:
This is a time limited offer, so act now.
[hopping up and down, waving hand]
Oh! Oh, me! Please do me! I’ll be your bestest friend!!!
[/hopping up and down, waving hand]
Me too! Me too! ::sad puppy look::
Oh yeah? Well, Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. Backwards. In high heels. - As per Wally
Me three! Me three! (Since I didn’t get a Wally sig…)
Winner, SDMB’s Biggest FEMALE Chat Addict (Happy, Jophiel?)
“Only two things that’ll soothe my soul - cold beer and remote control.”
Well, I guess I know what I’ll be doing tonight. I can’t say it isn’t deserved though.
Now where’d that damned, “Close Thread” button go?
Umm, are you calling me or the profile a dud Wally? Do I want to know? Personally I liked it. 
Just make yourself comfy while I shoot nuclear particles into your heart.
(Courtesy of Wally)
Not before I sign up!!
Any similarity between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
Well, since Wally didn’t give me a sig line, I suppose you won’t be giving me a profile either… sigh
I can only please one person per day.
Today is not your day.
Tomorrow isn’t looking good either.
I’d gladly submit myself as a guinea pig, but I’d think for a truely accuate profile, it’s gotta be done by a chat ho. But, UncBier has partaken of sweet libations with me on a pair of scintilating occasions.
Ohhhh UncleBeeeeeeeeer . . . .
Pardon me while I burst into flames.
UncBier: $0.85 (for the worldliness)
partaken: $0.50 (standard rate)
libations: $0.65 (better than quaff or liquid refreshment)
scintillating: $0.50 (again, standard rate)
Impressing the MB with selections from the thesaurus you got for Christmas: priceless
The preceding ad was brought to by Omni and the Visa/Mastercard company.
Battles are won in nuance.
Oh yeah. I have got to get me one of these!
This is my new sig. Thank Wally. It was his idea.
“I made my husband join a bridge club. He jumps next Tuesday.”
Flyper, quite nice, I’m impressed. 
Hey, UncleBeer! Do one for me. I know that we don’t know each other very well, so if you need any info about me in order to come up with something, email me. So, now I’ll have a Wally sig and an UncleBeer profile. Geez, 25 years old and I can’t do a damn thing for myself. Sad, isn’t it?
I never hate myself in the morning. I sleep till noon.
–Sig line courtesy of Wally 
Well, I have a Wally sig. I need the UncleBeer profile to complete the set. Purty purty please?
Drink up, dear. I made it just for you.
sig by WallyM7
Phouka
Homepage: www.phoukatoyoutwo.com
Occupation: Philanthropist
Location: Phoenix
Interests: Phone Phouking, Phocomelia, Phoenicia.
MoosieGirl
Homepage: www.loosiegoosiemoosie.gov
Occupation: Taxidermist and hunt guide
Location: Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, Canada
Interests: The Loyal Order of the Moose, Moosehead (and the beer).
Falcon
Homepage: www.tiercel.com
Occupation: Culling slow moving vermin
Location: The wild blue yonder.
Interests: Thermals, updrafts, downdrafts, air currents in general.
psycat90
Homepage: www.urigeller.com
Occupation: Flack for The Psychic Friend’s Network
Location: Concentrate and it’ll come to you. You’re not concentrating, damnit. Try harder.
Interests: Telekinesis, Psychokinesis, Thoughtography.
SanibelMan
Homepage: www.I’mjustagigolo.edu
Occupation: Teen-age gigolo
Location: Sanibel Island, Florida, USA, Earth, Sol System, Milky Way Galaxy, Universe 1, you know, the one with 3 dimensions…
Interests: Paper, Plastics and Canvas Bags
Omniscient
Homepage: www.youdon’tknowshit.edu
Occupation: All-knowing, All-seeing, Future God
Location: Purgatory
Interests: Shiny Objects, Beer, Pointy Objects, Beer, Round Objects, Beer, Flat Objects, Beer, Heavy Objects, Beer…
Diane
Homepage: www.where’smybeer.org
Occupation: Pining for UncleBeer
Location: My heart is with UncleBeer (and I wish my body was, too)
Interests: I’ll give you one guess
Cristi
Homepage: www.mutilatedpeep.com
Occupation: Slayer of Peeps, Heir Apparent to St. George
Location: Peeples, Colorado.
Interests: Mutilating, Mangling, Maiming and Generally Butchering Marshmallow Peeps.
I’m still on Wally’s shitlist.
UncleBeer, I just wanted to say that you’re a very good sport to do this for everyone. You don’t have to do one for me, unless you’re really bored tonight, and want to. Seriously. No, really, you don’t have to.
You sing in my consciousness like a counterpoint to my life.
L.L.
That’s my name, not a description. I am neither purple nor a bear. Okay, so I’m purple.<a true Wally original!>
Jumping up and down behind all the tall people… me too please
Give your children these two things: One is roots, the other, wings - Wally Wally He’s our Man
What about me?
Shadowfox
“The dead have risen, and they’re voting Republican!” - Bart Simpson