I’ll start with a self-Pitting. I saw this tweet and as a Seahawks fan, for a moment I was a bit dismayed:
Then I realized what fucking day it was.
I love your title.
Me too! How have we not thought of that one before? 
I like the 420 and 69 drop in his contract deal.
Thank you, I was worried it would be too obscure but I figured Dopers would get it.
Is there something else you mean besides fingers stained with cheetle dust? Please advise!
I assume people were talking about the thread title.
If you’re curious about my account title, I once won a contest here on the SDMB where we had to predict when a particularly problematic poster would get banned. My guess came closest and so I was sent a bag of Cheetos (and some hatch chilis) as a prize, and I was asked to post photos of my Cheeto-stained fingers on the boards, which I did.
I did a search and found the thread:
As to the title of this thread:
Question: what’s wrong with a story, posted on the reputable Canadian TV network Global News, about an automated crypto trading platform that was offered on the reputable TV series Dragon’s Den? Specifically, Dragons made the minimum $250 deposit on live TV, and watched their investment grow by hundreds of dollars in just minutes. An independent reporter made the same $250 investment, and it grew more slowly, but after 30 days he had made $7300.
Here’s what’s wrong.
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The website claiming to be Global News isn’t. It’s some scammy website that stole the Global logo and banner. Anything you click on the banner just invites you to invest fast, before it’s too late!
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I can’t find a reputable source for this story anywhere, neither on Global News or anywhere else.
It’s a scam, and it appears as an ad served up by the Edge browser, which is really disappointing and infuriating. The only reason I clicked on it was because it referenced Dragon’s Den. I reported it but I think all that accomplished was remove the ad from my feed.
ETA: My understanding is that crypto trading platforms like this do exist. I don’t know if many – or any – are legit, but I have zero interest in them, and anyway the way this one was presented was blatantly fraudulent. It crossed my mind to report it to police but I’ve now lost the link, and I wasn’t sure whether evidence for fraud was strong enough beyond the blatant misrepresentation of Global, and probably Dragon’s Den, too, if the product never even appeared there.
I would say “crypto” is the problem and not bother reading any further. Once that word comes into play you know it’s not legitimate.
I’m not sure that absolutely everything connected with crypto is necessarily a scam, but as I said, this wasn’t a Global News story at all and was being fraudulently (and badly) misrepresented as a Global News website when it wasn’t. I suspect the product never even appeared on Dragon’s Den, either. I suspect the way it may work is that you “invest” your minimum $250 and then never see it again.
No, nor is betting all of your money on a spin of the roulette wheel in Vegas, but it also is never a legitimate investment opportunity. At best it’s a gamble you might get lucky on, with really bad odds.
And I do agree with you that in all likelihood everything in the story and advertisement were fabrications.
Yesterday an employee asked if I went to church on easter. She knows I’m an atheist, it’s not something I hide. Her reasoning? Even though I don’t ordinarily go to church, easter is such an important holiday. WTF?
Maybe they figure you might not worship Christ but might want to honor the Easter Bunny.
And you fasted during Ramadan, of course…
I’d hope you just stared at her until she figured it out. For a minute or two, if needed.
But that might have been useless against “logic” like hers.
I’d still be there. On the plus side, my gf is still riffing on the whole concept.
As will we all. I’m on my way to a poker group that’s 33.3% Jewish, 16.7% Atheist, 16.7% Fundie, and 33.3% Sane Christian.
I can assure you, your anecdote will give us a good fifteen minutes of laughter and storytelling.
Have you ever been in a social situation where you thought you having a nice conversation with a like-minded person when slowly it dawns on you what a raging douche-bag the other person is?
I’m at jam night last night (I’ve been playing like shit lately, but last night I got my mojo back and I blew it away, but I digress), and I had a set with this guy I’d never met before who was a really good guitar player. The set went well with fist bumps all around and a post-set mini autopsy of who played what – all was well. Then I’m outside and the other guitar player comes up and strikes up a conversation and, as I said, I thought we were having a pleasant little talk, and at some point he says, “I bet I’m older than you.”
“Maybe, but I doubt it,” I replied.
“How old are you?”
“Fifty-eight.”
“Oh,” he was deflated, “well, I’m fifty-five …” I could tell he had speech in his pocket about how young he looked but I blew it for him.
He then went on to ask me if I exercise. I told him, not really, but I do get a lot walking in with my dog and just in general. And he started to respond but added a little, “Ok, you like to lie to yourself.” I thought maybe he was joking, so I let it slide, but he repeated it, so I called him on it. Then I got this whole fucking yarn about all the supplements he takes and all the weights he lifts and all the girls he fucks all this and that, punctuated with little jibes at me, including something like, “okay don’t do any of that if you just want to die early.”
In earlier days I might have gotten into a bit of a pickle with the fellow because so desperately wanted to tell him to go fuck himself with a huge bottle of Glucosomine, or whatever hell he uses to turn his pee bright green. Instead, I moseyed away and smoked a joint. And I didn’t offer him any. Wouldn’t want to conflict with his vitamin regimen.
I might need to find a new tax accountant (again) Oh they do a good job with fast turnaround, last year we hired them and met the main man in his office. Nice guy, conservative sure but aren’t all CPA’s?
Yesterday went downtown to sign the returns in person, idw they don’t do digital sigs but whatever. Inside the building walking down the very beige unadorned hallways to the main office I’m feeling perturbed for some reason the atmosphere feels oppressive.
We find the right door and go in to be greeted by a television spewing NewsMax propaganda. I roll my eyes make a few comments under my breath about maga bots and out pops Marge with our file. She looks me up and down unsmiling. Did she overhear me? Next she’s cordial going over r the return, we sign and then says we’ll efile this for you and then send your bill. What it is idk! We could probably do our own but neither of us wants too.
I think maybe now she’ll tack on a libtard fee for my speaking out. Like wtf 
Outside my dear one points out main guys car, plastered with trump stickers.
That bill better be fair!
Quelle Ôuanquére, as the French say.
Yeah. What do the English say (I don’t know what that means)?