When I was a teenager, we’d pick some guy walking with his girlfriend/date and yell, “Fuck her! I did!”
It worked especially well on prom night.
“Don’t kiss her, she blew me!”
Yes, we were quite mature.
Is it safe to say you spent your prom night dateless?
I always found it annoying in college how students and townies (teenagers mostly) would try to sneak into our fraternity parties. They were open to everyone, except the house only holds so many people so there would inevitably be a line to get in. And people ONLY wanted to go to the party that had a line to get in. It’s like “dude…it’s FULL. Try one of the other five frat parties down the street!.” And of course every drunk asshole thinks it’s a personal affront that they have to wait until some people clear out.
It did give me the opportunity to bust out a few good lines from time to time:
Jerkoff Freshman “Hey…can I just climb through the window.”
Me: “No. It’s too dangerous.”
Jerkoff Freshman “How is it dangerous?”
Me: Because if I catch you climbing in through a window, I’m going to beat you to death."
or
Me: Bar’s full, you have to wait a few minutes until someone leaves.
Townie: Mumble mumble…complain complain.(starting to display typical drunk aggressive behavior)
Me: Dude. Just wait a few minutes until the guy at the exit starts clearing people out once they get their beers.
Townie: Mumble mumble…Hey…How come everyone has those flashlights
Me: “Everyone” doesn’t have them. Just the guys responsible for running the party. It’s dark so we use them for checking IDs, helping people find the bathroom, basic safety stuff (click…click…click)
Townie: So why doesn’t yours work?
Me: Because I only really use it to beat people with.
In reality, I don’t think I ever heard of anyone actually getting MagLited at a party. But most of the fraternities carried them at the party’s as just a little extra deterrent to someone starting trouble. Really the same reason actual bouncers and cops carry them.
Yes, but that was as much by choice as anything else. True, I didn’t have a girlfriend at prom time (not that I didn’t date at all, just not then). Plus I didn’t see the sense in renting a tux for one night, and spending a lot of money I didn’t have. Sort of like the line in Animal House: “Ride a bunch of Kleenex down the street? Rah rah.” It was more fun for me to be anti-trendy. And later, I went to a few frat parties. I found the graffito to be true: “Frats are great. They weed all the assholes out of the dorms.”
I always find it interesting how people who would yell things like “Fuck her! I did!” or “Don’t kiss her, she blew me!” to a couple they don’t know or who belittle everyone else’s activities or traditions never realize that THEY are the “asshole”.
And now you know why they call it The Crying Game.
For one thing, I wasn’t belittling “everyone else’s” activities or traditions, and for the second, I fully realized I was being an asshole at the time. That was part of the point.
However, it was the early 80s when I went to a couple of frat parties, and the preppy fad was in full swing. I believe all the guys were named Tad, and all the girls were named Muffy, so they were pretentious shits.
Grrr…the first retort that sprang to mind for me was:
“I got your cream right here you little cunt,” while grabbing my crotch.
I think I would have said it, it didn’t even happen to me and I’m worked up.
All RIGHT!
[DLux throws Queen Bruin a high-5]
(Haw haw heeheeheehee snrksnrffgiggle)
I don’t think it was so bad at my college simply for the fact that something like half the student body was involved in fraternities and sororities. Then again, most of my school consisted of pretentious jerks anyway. I find the act itself of forming a fraternity and declaring yourself “elite” a bit pretentous.