And now that I think about it, Wang-Ka can go to hell, too.
You see, I’m currently at an in-between job as an intern at a law firm before starting a teaching job in August. I’m trying to apply for graduate school, and at this internship job they’ve run out of things for me to do. When I first started, I would do constructive things with my free time, like read books and work on my personal statement for grad school applications. Then, over dinner one night, a friend of mine says, “WHAT???!! YOU HAVEN’T READ THE EVIL BLIMP STORY?? I’LL SEND YOU THE LINK TOMORROW!” So he does, and I read what is possibly the Funniest Story Ever, and I start poking around the SDMB. I come across some pretty good threads, but all the while I’m thinking, “Man, these people have WAY too much time on their hands. I mean, some of this stuff is good, but these people need to get lives.” Then I come across Wang-Ka’s Jehovah’s Witness story, with links to the Watermelon story and the various Fire Extinguisher stories, laugh my ass off, end up registering, and now I spend my time at work futzing around on the SDMB with all you asshats. And you know how much time I’ve spent here over the last week by the fact that I just used the words “futzing” and “asshats” in the same sentence. I mean, I spent an entire day catching up on the Missing Co-Worker story between projects. YOU PEOPLE HAVE SUCKED ME IN, and I don’t like it!! I think Cecil is using this message board to flash subliminal messages at us poor schmucks to get us to keep coming back (and please, no one provide a link to the Straight Dope column about how subliminal messaging doesn’t work; I was speaking tongue-in-cheek).
Don’t feel bad October, I too, was sucked in the Evil Blimp story. My co-worker showed it to me, and I’ve been here ever since. I was also greatly sucked in by the Missing Co-worker saga, and the “AAAGGGH Spider” thread had me laughing so hard I was crying.
Since I’ve discovered SDMB it’s been really difficult to force myself to actually WORK when I’m at work. I keep trying to sneak peaks at SDMB, promising myself I’ll only be there for five minutes.
Yup, SDMB has become a sick addiction, and I think I’m going to need some intervention soon.
The one Titled “Gah, Spider, Spider, Spider in my pants”? Oh okay, I was looking for one titled just “AAAAGGH Spider”. VERY funny, AND sad, I felt so bad for him getting all cut up and having such bills from it!!!
(pssst Payton’s Servent? You don’t live in TEXAS do you?? That’s where I’m moving, and unlike you, I DETEST and am terrified of the darn things!!!)
Which the boyfriend thinks is great, as I do all kinds of “there’s SPIDER on ME!!!” dances around him.
Oh lord, if you think you’re wasting time now, don’t do a search for pimple , and for heaven’s sake DO NOT search for stop the farting . Word to the wise.
I hate you all. I just spent the last two hours reading the Child of Filth (inspired), farting (almost got me in trouble at work), and pimple threads. It’s a good thing I wasn’t a member when those last two were posted, because I have some doozies, and I would have felt compelled to share with y’all a pimple story that required a humongous cover-up lie, a secret trip to the emergency room, and a trip to a plastic surgeon, and not a single soul knows the truth of it.