The real trouble comes when the piano has to be out NOW, won’t fit through the letterbox, and so they chainsaw through the wall, saying the wall will need some recovery time.
Have you noticed there are no calendars filled with pictures of scantily-clad bassoonists? Yeah, not an accident. 
Don’t be so sure! There seems to be evidence that some of them are leading double lives. 
That’s only evidence that some of them aspire to owning a green T-shirt with someone else’s picture on it. Which sadly seems more accurate.
All this Reminds me of when my university orchestra performed Ravel’s Bolero. Big concert hall, tuxes, the whole deal. It was percolating along nicely, getting set up for the big bassoon passage. The bassoonist launched into the passage squeaking and scronking and scrunching up his face and man he started licking on that reed like…
Well anyway I felt sorry for the guy. He eventually recovered but the damage was done.