Tripler’s Theory on Dating & Fishing
A treatise by Tripler
Dating and Fishing are eerily connected by the procedures neccesary to obtain a desired end state. Given that in Dating the prome objective is to find that “special someone” through which love can be shared, and given that in Fishing the prime goal is to land that “trophy fish”. Be it resolved that that “special someone” and that “trophy fish” can be summarily described by one word: a catch. However, in order to examine the eery connections between Dating & Fishing, one must look distcintly at key components of both events: Bait, Location, Method, Weather, and Luck
Let’s take it by the numbers:
It’s about the Bait you use:. Some folks swear by it, others just figure it’s a complication. With fish, you need to know what bait works best with certain types. Some may like spinners, others go for fishing flys. It’s the same in dating, some women like the strong “bad-boy” type, some men like the “wild-girl”. Dependent on the type of catch you are looking to “hookup/land”, bait is chosen with a particular type in mind. No successful single/fisher goes out just to catch anything. Keep in mind, if you walk into a sports bar, a tuxedo is definitely the wrong bait. . .
Location, location, location. It’s all about location. In some lakes/bars the catch is not biting at all, while in others the catch is just throwing itself into the boat/dropping numbers in your wallet for you! Depending on the type of trolling you prefer, some lakes/bars are better than others for your catch. Some places you feel better about trolling in, others not. It’s all about how you want to approach the situation. Once you find a good lake/watering hole (coincidence?) it gets that much easier. . .
Method! Obviously, the best single knows when to use a line on the same level that a fisher knows how to pick a spot on the lake. Sometimes you get a nibble, sometimes you nibble on the other’s line. You also need to have a method for seeing which fish you decide to “throw back”. Maybe the fish isn’t too long enough, and maybe he seems just too redneck for you. It’s all about personal style and method… One method common to both endeavours is the drinking of beer. Strangely, both are performed relatively successfully when the single/fisher is somewhat relaxed. It also helps if the fish are drunk too . . .
Weather Sometimes, the sun shines on ya, other times it just rains. You can’t help what you can’t control. Obviously the clouds/your mouthy friend can keep the fish from biting. But that’s no reason not to try to troll. As with both Dating and Fishing, make sure you wear sunscreen.
Lady luck, and how she stings. Sometimes it’s just pure luck if you land the catch. You can’t explain it, you can’t control it, the catch took the bait, and you reeled him/her in. Sweet, isn’t it? Just make sure you can filet. . .
In conclusion,
I see Dating and Fishing as the same endeavour. Both require finesse and timing, and a huge application of strategy and tactics. Both usually go hand-in-hand with beer. Once I realized that everyone is trolling, it got that much easier to deal with. Ya just gotta get out there and drop a line in the water if you wanna catch a fish . . .
Tripler
This isn’t as funny as I hoped it would be. . .
