When going to restaurants on a date I’ve never ordered for “The Lady” because I’ve always felt it was kind of cheesy myself.
So anyway, if I’m sitting at the table and my lady friend casually says something to the effect of “Hmm, I think I’m going to have the chicken with wild rice.” Is that some kind of hint for me to order for her when the waiter gets there?
And yes, I realize “different strokes for different folks” I’m just curious if this is how you would interpret this.
I don’t know. I would say probably not. I’d think she’s just being polite and letting you know how much her meal is going to cost ahead of time? Does she look at you expectantly as the waiter comes up to ask your order?
I don’t date, but my guess is it is more of an attempt at a conversation starter than it is anything about wanting you to order for her or what the meal will cost.
FWIW, my last girlfriend loved it when I ordered for her. She did that on the first date (“I think I’d like the cajun chicken.”) and I ordered it for her. Apparently it turned her on.
I’d wouldn’t be a hint from me. I think the whole man ordering, “the lady will have . . .” thing is super dated – and I am a very proper 37 y.o. who isn’t usually put off by things that are old-fashioned.
I can see making that as sort of a filler comment. “I think I’ll have the salmon. What are you having?” But not as a prompt to have the guy order for me. If it’s a decent restaurant and the waiter takes the lady’s order first (as s/he should), s/he should look at the lady inquiringly. If she then looks at you with raised brows or some other indicator that you should speak up, go ahead and order for her. If the waiter looks to you to order first, just say “Dategirl, what are you having?” This will prompt her to order for herself and also prompt the waiter to take her order first.
I honestly don’t know any single woman who still expects the man to order for her. To the contrary, I know some who don’t appreicate it when he tries to do it.
It wouldn’t be a hint from me. I grew up with a family that chats, or at least mentions, what we’re ordering before the waiter gets there. It’s just a small conversation, and if you aren’t sure what you want, someone else’s choice can help you pick.
Now, I wouldn’t be offended if a guy ordered for me, but I’d find it odd and I’d wonder if he’s the sort that wants to always be in control.
I would take it as a conversation starter. Also, I personally don’t mind when the guy orders. It is a bit “old-fashioned”, but I spend all day with guys who have no manners whatsoever, so “old-fashioned” manners are appreciated.
Chicken and wild rice sounds like she’s tossing out a mid-ranged price selection to see how you react and/or maybe just thinking out loud.
If you’re paying, she’d like to know what you can afford.
If she’s paying, she may be letting you know what she can afford.
If you’re going dutch, she may still be trying to gauge the price range, so one of you doesn’t feel uncomfortable.
If she’s hinting she wants you to order for her, she should probably do better than “I think I’m going to have…” You’re basically her waiter now, so she needs to actually place the order with you so you can pass it on to the waiter.
Yeah, if she was trying to hint around about anything, I’d say it was that she was trying to make sure you wouldn’t object to the price. But my guess is that, most likely, she was just making conversation. I often talk to the dude about what looks good on the menu while we’re waiting for the server to come back just to have something to talk about.
Assuming this is a new relationship, it’s probably a good thing you didn’t jump in and order for her. Nowadays, I think most women would be annoyed if you did that on a first date. It would come across as being overly controlling.
I can imagine that if I had been dating a guy for a while and he knew me well enough to know what I like I would enjoy it if he ordered for me…but on a first date, I would definitely prefer to order for myself.
Another romantic touch that impresses a woman is to try and remember her name throughout the complete course of the date.
True. It sort of diminishes the romance if you say “I’ll have the steak, medium, and Whatsherface will have the mahi mahi.” 
Hmm, I would have totally misread the “is this too expensive?” signal. My default is to let adults order for themselves. How does one handle the “is this too expensive?” signal? If I’m paying I’ve already budgeted for her to order whatever she wants and I’d see it as a conversation starter. I’d probably read the description and say “oh, that looks good.” or “the baby bald eagle stuffed with hummingbird tongues is calling my name, but last time I had it they had overspiced it a bit. Ruined the natural flavors.”
Enjoy,
Steven
At which I point I would be comfortable responding with “Actually, now the surf and turf is starting to look good…”
Or maybe it’s a hint to order something similar so the same bottle of wine will go well with both your orders.
I’d reply “Oh, that does sound good. Me, I think I’m going to have the blackened catfish with rutabagas”.
And I’d expect her to either pay her half or alternative with the treating, unless there’s a major economic discrepancy in our situations.
Yeesh, we’re grownups here, presumably mutually interested in each other’s company. This is something nice to do together, it’s not some kind of down-payment on access to her parts.
I have heard that there are women who would find a male uncharitable, miserly, uninclined to be sharing and giving and so forth, if he actually indicated that he did expect her to pay her half. I’ve never found that to be the case. Admittedly advance screening might be playing a major role there.
I have found women who for some reason expect the person with the testicles to be somehow better equipped to eliminate bugs. Hey, do I look like the Orkin man? Let’s take turns.
More reasonably, I can reach higher shelves, lift heavier things, and I’m tall enough and disreputable-looking enough to dissuade predatory people in physically intimidating settings. If I’m with a woman who walks and feels like no one in their right freaking mind is gonna accost her, way cool, but it’s not an equality-demand on my part or anything.
The militant feminists (my kind of people) insist on it all; the rest, not so much, but they’re generally OK with the whole 'tude when they find I do dishes not just cook if I say let’s eat in, and that I’m not with some kind of hostile-suspicious “women get over” chip on my shoulder.
You know, I’m not sure how to answer the OP, but I have a funny story…
My ex and I were together for 3.5 years and he ALWAYS ordered for me. We broke up, I was on a date with a new guy, it was time to order and I sat there dumbly waiting for him to order for me. He didn’t. hehe. It was kind of funny.
Anyhow - I guess I sort of expect that a guy is going to order for me and if he doesn’t I’m kind of taken aback. It’s not a big deal, but I just get all flummoxed when it happens.
To the OP - well, really, I got nothin’. I really think it depends on the gal in question. And yes, remembering her name is probably a good idea. 
you know, I might actually mention my choice because of price, sorta semi-consciously. I might be thinking “oh, I hope he’s not worried that I’ll order the lob$ter” or, conversely, “I hope he doesn’t think I’m impressed because there’s lob$ter on the menu.” And then I’d pick the chicken, and blurt it out because no one was talking and thats whats on my mind. So again, conversation starter.
Heh, I guess I’m an old-fashioned girl. I’d know who was paying before we went into the restaurant and if he was, I’d say, “Hey, is there a certain budget you’d like to me stick to?” It’s amazing how much easier things are when you just say what’s on your mind.
Regarding the OP, if I were on a first date I’d be put off if a man ordered for me. It’s very common in my social circle to talk about what we’re going to order beforehand–she was probably just making conversation. In this day and age, I’d stay on the safe side and only order for your date if she directly asked you to do it.
/2 cents
In my household, bugs don’t get eliminated. They get either oohed and ahhed over and then ignored, or, if they’re especially squicky, they get shooed into a paper cup and laid gently in the grass outside–a work I will gladly undertake on my husband’s behalf. Just sayin’ – we’re not all like that.
“I’m thinking about the chicken with wild rice.”
“That sounds nice. Although, I feel like celebrating tonight. The broiled Po’ouli looks fun. What do you think?”
“Now that you mention it, the saffron marinated coelacanth looks good too.”
“Let’s get both. We could share.”
“That sounds great.”
Or you could just say “hey, we’re both adults. Get whatever you want for under $29.95. Wanna go back to my place later and have sex?”