Dating Poll: Let's shatter some stereotypes!

In My Humble Opinion
1

Okay, this was mostly inspired by the ongoing debate in the Nice Guy thread. It seems whenever there’s a dating thread and the weather’s right, there’s a 42.6% chance of it devolving into a “women want jerks” “no we don’t, men want big boobs” “no we don’t, women want jerks” debate.

While the sample size will be a bit skewed since we all know it’s a scientific fact that Dopers are 200% more awesome than regular people, I figure we should have a catch-all poll thread about dating and maybe we can get a final verdict on things.

  1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)
    1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
    1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
    1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
    1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
    1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?

  2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
    2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
    2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?

If anybody thinks of anything else to add that’s gravy, but I didn’t want to make this TOO complicated. :stuck_out_tongue:

My answer:

2

1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)
Going back how far? I had a girlfriend in kindergarten. I’ll start with high school and say 8, but that includes a 17-year marriage.

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
I’d say 3, including my current girlfriend.

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
Zero.

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
One, maybe two.

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
Varies greatly. Two (including current girlfriend) are over 5’10", a couple under 5’4". Full-figured to petite.

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?
Varies greatly. Current girlfriend wears (IIRC) an H cup. A couple in high school were, I’m guessing, B. One in college may have been an A.

2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
One.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
Zero.

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?
A very odd mix: Part of me didn’t feel ready yet, part of me was hung up on another girl. (This was during my separation.)

3
  1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)

3
1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?

1

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?

0

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?

2

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?

5’4" ish Medium build

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?

One was small, one was medium the third was large.
2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)

1

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)

0

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?

She was a bit crazy and she moved across the country the next day.

4

1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)
In my adult life, I’ve been in five relationships that merited “boyfriend” status.

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
Two

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
None, although I have no particular affection for the other three, either.

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
None.

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
None. They were all wildly different physical types.

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?
Seriously? I mean… seriously? Howsabout we go with “adequate to my needs”.

2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
Hundreds.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
None. That’s not to say I’ve never been rejected, just not that early. I make an excellent first impression. :wink:

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?
Sometimes, it just ain’t there.

5

1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)
Two.

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
One.

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
None.

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
One, I think. Not sure. Definitely not the other one, because I know me and it would screw up our friendship.

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
One was short and overweight, the other tall and underweight.

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?
One big, one small.

2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
None.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
None, really.

6
  1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)

Um… Thirty?

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?

None. I tried staying friends with the last one, but she couldn’t deal.

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?

Zero.

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?

Not a single one.

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?

Mostly a little overweight, but quite a few were just right.

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?

B-cup.

  1. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)

I lost count back during the Reagan administration.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)

I lost count back during the Reagan administration.

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?

I lost count back during the Reagan administration.

7

I’m female, late 40s, married 15 years.

  1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)
    Oh, probably two dozen. (Hey, I’m old and grew up during the '70s.)
    1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
    None, but I’m a hermit, so that is to be expected. I could have remained friends with probably half if I had not retreated into my cave. I was friends with quite a few of them for years after we dated (and pre-cave).
    1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
    Only one.
    1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
    None.
    1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
    They were all thin, as was I. (We were all young. I’m guessing they’re not all thin now.) Heights ranged from 5’4" to 6’4".
    1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?
    Gee, none of them were so large or so small as to stand out (hee) from the crowd, so generally ranging from 6-8 inches, I suppose.

  2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
    Probably 6-10. Two were creepy stalker types.
    2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
    Maybe two.
    2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?
    No, I don’t think so. For me it was usually that he was either politically or ideologically incompatible OR had no sense of humor. For them, it was usually that I did not meet their physical ideal.

8

  1. How many people have you “dated”? 19
    1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends? 0
    1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate? 0
    1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions? 17
    1d: What was the average build/weight of these people? no such thing; there were short chubby girls, little elfin ones, big girls, tall and slender, etc.
    1e. What was the average bust size of these people? flat chested through more than a handful

  2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands) 1
    2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.) 3
    2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? nope

9
  1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)

2 mainly because I have a tendency to have short relationships so I have no reason to refer to the ones I’m dating as anything other then this chick.

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?

0 We parted ways and are friendly when we run into each other but I haven’t seen one since graduation and the other since she broke up with my good friend.

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?

0 It just ended there were no hard feelings on my end.

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?

1 She was smoking hot and I’m free and clear right now.

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?

If you take only people that I’ve referred to as my girlfriend the 5’5" 135#

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?

Maybe an 34Cish. The first one had huge breasts after that I’ve looked for more in the B range but in the “girlfriend” group she represents a large part.

  1. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)

1 I’m pretty picky who I’ll go out with or sleep with so after the initial step I’ll at least stick it out for a while but she was a blind date.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)

5 Like I said I have high standards so I shoot out of my league a lot.

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?

No I think the reasons were different every time one thought I was clingy another was pissed that I looked at a text from another girl and third I threw up in her car on the way to her house.

In general I like tall athletic smart girls and in general I’ve found the treat 'em mean keep 'em keen is the best dating advice ever but I feel dirty following it. Just as a data point 25, male, average relationship about 3 weeks

10

I am a female, mid-20s. My average “real” relationship length is 1.5 years.

  1. How many people have you “dated”?
    4, including my current SO

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
2

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
0

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
0

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
Thin to average, generally over 6’ tall

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?
Um, normal sized? No rulers were ever involved.

  1. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates?
    Around 20.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates?
Around 5.

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?
Varied. Most of the time, we just failed to “click.” A few times, they turned out to be absolute nutcases. With one particular charmer, the police were called. One left me for the Residents’ Life Association. Once, I just wanted to make an ex-boyfriend extremely angry by sleeping with a friend/rival of his.

11

1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)
4

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
2

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
1

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
0

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
I don’t know, really. One of my exes was about 5’6" and 115 lbs soaking wet while another was 6’2" and about 350 lbs. My current boyfriend is about 6’ tall and is probably about 260 lbs or so. I tend to date taller, heavier men since that is what I find attractive but I am by no means unwilling to date men who are short or thin.

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?
There was quite a range here. One of them had a 9" penis and another was maybe 3.5" if he was lucky (I was engaged to this guy for a while, so I am being completely honest when I say that size doesn’t matter at all!) The other two fall a little above average, size wise.
2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
Wow, this is a tough question! I have dated a lot and most of those people did not become my SO. I would say in the last year probably 12-14.*

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
Again, a tough question! I would say in the last year 5-6, at least.*

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?
Incompatibility. There was something, whether it was physical or emotional or whatever, that just made us incompatible for one another.

*These numbers are all just dates, not sex. I have had a single one night stand in my entire life and that was years ago. I’m not against them with someone I trust and could be friends with in the future but they are not a regular part of my dating life, to be sure.

12
  1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)

5-8, depending on your definition. Including my long time on again off again girlfriend.
1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?

1 (current girlfriend), I guess two if you count Facebook
1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?

0
1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?

I guess any if they were still hot. Don’t know since I haven’t seen them in years.
1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?

I never actually measured them but generally average girl height, on the petite to curvy side.
1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?

I guess about B or C (one girl kind of skewed the average a bit)

(no penisis thankfully)
2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?

A lot. I mean if we are talking anything from an actual date with no action to a one night stand to making out with a drunk NYU student in the bathroom of an East Village bar (long story…actually no…that just about covers it) to a casual relationship not covered above then probably like 30.

Reasons could be anything:
Summer fling
I was drunk
I have a girlfriend
Boring
Didn’t put out
This is clearly a one night stand
Nothing in common

13

  1. about a dozen? Not that many considering my age.
    1a. 1
    1b. 3
    1c. 1
    1d: 125lbs ranging from 5’2 to 5’8
    1e. C (although it covers the whole spectrum)

  2. two dozen or so (although none were one night stands)
    2a. four or five (two one nighters)
    2b. I can’t speak for them but for me it was just a lack of chemistry

14

Male here. Let’s see …

1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend) - 6. Few considering my age.

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends? - 1 (2, if you count my current girlfriend; I think we’ll remain good friends if we split up.) I consider one ex among my best friends, even though she’s now married with children; we still keep in touch, and see each other every couple of years although she’s across the country. I’m on good terms with a couple of others, during the rare times I see them.

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate? - 0. One I find frustrating, looking back on the relationship, but hate … not really.

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions? - I wouldn’t feel comfortable having sex with anyone else while I’m dating. Tempting, for sure, but I can’t.

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people? - Medium build; generally weight-proportionate-to-height (size 4 through 10, maybe?). No women who are “thick” or larger.

**1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people? ** - A variety. Breast size doesn’t matter one bit to me.

2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands) - Maybe 20? One night stands and two-week flings: maybe three.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.) More than I can remember. A lot more than the answer above, for sure.

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so? My rejecting her: physical (women I met through online dating sites that were plus-sized despite representing themselves to the contrary), boring or no chemistry, too religious, Seinfeidian (visible mustache, frumpy teacher clothes, etc.), and most recently, meeting someone where a relationship was established faster, while the dating/relationship process was progressing more slowly with a woman I met beforehand. Her rejecting me: “I’m making up with my ex-boyfriend”, no chemistry, God knows what else.

15

Yay, I get to throw a monkey wrench in here with my data.

1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend) 4 that definitely fit that, but could be a bit higher depending on how strict you mean that. For instance, I had another that was as serious as most few month relationships, but that terminology was never used.
1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends? 0, but I’d say 1 if you counted some of the more lax definitions.
1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate? 0. I am quite bitter about a couple of them and how they acted at the end of the relationships, but I certainly don’t wish any bad things on them.
1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions? Depends on what “no-strings-attached-sex” means. I don’t have a current GF, so I don’t have that to worry about. If it meant I’d just have sex and not have to wine/dine or talk to her before or after, I’d still have to say no unless it somehow magically included the emotional baggage that comes along with it, but in that case, really how many people wouldn’t say yes?
1d: What was the average build/weight of these people? All were generally at least 6" shorter than me. One was a little overweight, but the rest were slim, fit, and shapely.
1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people? One had very large breasts, but they were, quite frankly, the ones I liked least and was also the girl to which I was least attracted physically. The rest were somewhere around the B-C range.

2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands) 0. Then again, I’ve not been one for formal dating. There was, however, one that was completely mutual (she had to move, and we didn’t want to have an LDR) and not because we weren’t interested in eachother (we were). Not sure if that counts.
2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.) 1, unless you want to count the mutual one.
2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so? For the one that rejected me, it was the first time I made an attempt to do some sort of formal dating other than after a relationship was well established, and I never really got an explanation, she just started having “other plans” and I got the message. My impression is that it’s some combination between her being turned off by some of my interests (the ones to which I refer do tend to be looked at very diffently by men and women) and that I may have come across as indecisive and aloof when it was really a conscious effort to be considerate and a good listener. Live and learn.
FWIW, I’m 26 and, if you couldn’t tell by the context, male.

16

I question the accuracy of answers to 1e. Most people don’t go around with rulers and measuring tape.

17

  1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend) 3
    1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends? 2
    1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate? 0
    1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions? 2
    1d: What was the average build/weight of these people? Two were taller than me, but not by much. One was 2 inches shorter. Two were fairly muscular, one was not.
    1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people? I didn’t measure!

  2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands) 5 or 6
    2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.) 1
    2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so? One guy was racist. Another had 7 (SEVEN!) kids. One talked about himself all the time. One had no personality. One was a horndog.

18

*1. How many people have you “dated”? (Dating, in this case, meaning you actively called them your girlfriend/boyfriend)
Eleven, I think

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?
***I am only in regular contact with one. (She’s upstairs). ***

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?
***None. I can interact quite pleasantly with all the ones I have seen since the breakup. Many of these are high school or college.

The only one who ticked me off when we broke up was the one who dumpled me. She married the guy who she dumped me for. They are since divorced. And time heals all wounds.***

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?
None. I don’t do that.

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?
Normal height and build. The one who dumped me (see above) has gained considerable weight since we ended the relationship. Several of my high school girlfirends have not aged well. The Lovely and Talented Mrs. Shodan takes a certain pleasure in that fact, which she went out of her way to ascertain at my high school reuinion.

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people?
***A C cup. I prefer the full-figured gal, myself. Four of my last five have brought the average up.

I made the unfortunate mistake of honesty with tLaTMS once. She wanted to know why I asked her out before her roommate, who was quite attractive and tLaTMS was miildly insecure about it. I told her the real reason, which is that she had the bigger chest, and she wouldn’t speak to me for several hours.

No penes.

  1. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)
    One. She fit my first criterion, in that she was quite pretty and generously endowed. However, she was nucking futs, and not in a good way.

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)
One. I liked her more than she liked me, and chose to end the relationship rather than be exclusive.

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?*
See above

Regards,
Shodan

19

**1. How many people have you “dated”? **

Many. Seriously I don’t know - 20? 25? 30? It’s a lot.

1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends?

Really good friends? 1 Casual friends - 10.

1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate?

None

1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions?

None

1d: What was the average build/weight of these people?

It’s really, really diverse. Shortest was about 5’4". Tallest was about 6’5". Lightest was about 115 lbs soaking wet. Heaviest was about 250. They mostly tend to be somewhat fit but there were a couple of couch potatos that snuck through.

1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people? - Again, really diverse. Smallest was about 2" (I wish I was kidding - I felt kind of sorry for the guy). Largest was friggin’ huge. I didn’t measure it but it was a least a foot long. I refused to have sex with him because it was so massive. (We did other stuff).

2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands)

Lots

2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? (This includes one-night stands, too.)

None? I don’t think I’ve ever gone on a date with a guy that I really hoped would phone and then he didn’t phone.

2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? What were they, if so?

It’s a bit of mix. I just wasn’t into him. He was a jerk to the waiter. He was a jerk to me. He didn’t laugh at my jokes (which are HILLARIOUS!) That sort of thing. A couple of guys I went out with to be nice - that is, I kind of figured that I wasn’t into them but it doesn’t hurt to go out for dinner to see for sure.

20

I guess in my post we’re shattering the stereotype that bookish researchers don’t get a lot. Wait, that’s not a stereotype. Also, we’re going to get a close look at the period in my life between my two marriages in section 2 here, also known as “Dating Hell.”

  1. How many people have you “dated”? 2
    1a. Of these people, how many are still your friends? 1 (married to her now)
    1b. Of these people, how many do you actively hate? 0. I did because she cheated on me and it led to a lot of problems which I don’t want to go into now. But I just don’t care enough to hate any more.
    1c. Of these people, how many would you have no-strings-attached-sex with if you could and your current SO (if one exists) promised no repercussions? 0–not counting my wife of course
    1d: What was the average build/weight of these people? Average
    1e. What was the average penis/bust size of these people? C

  2. How many people have you rejected going out with after one or two dates? 2
    2a. How many people have rejected you after one or two dates? 10, I think.
    2b. Were the reasons for rejection (either way) usually the same? The two by me: Didn’t share very specialized cultural interest with one, didn’t share life goals with the other. The ten for me…hoo, let’s see. Two “I have a boyfriend but I was trying something new.” One “I had a boyfriend and I was trying something new.” One “That one-night stand was fun but I don’t want to make this friends-with-benefits.” One “Maybe this dating game isn’t for you…have you tried bowling instead? You can make a lot of friends that way.” One “You’re too serious for me, I’m going to date some of your friends instead.” One “I’m trying to figure out who I am, but it’s not going to be ‘your girlfriend.’” Two I can’t remember. Then the last one before I met my wife was something like “It’s obvious after all this time together that we really like each other and we’d be really great together but my parents like you and, secretly, I don’t like them all that much, so I’m going to disappear off the face of the planet and leave them to explain what happened,” only a lot more dramatic.

But, after all that, I’m the one who feels shallow about the two I rejected. And I’m not even that sure why.