Dear Abby...

Cafe Society
41

Dear Abby,

  I know this is hard to believe, but I took my girlfriend Susie to the drive-in. Well, the movie was kind of boring, and we dozed off. Well, next thing you know, we wake up and it's 4 AM.

  All the kids at school think we went all the way, and they're pointing at Susie, saying "Oooh la la!"

  What are we gonna tell her mama? What are we gonna tell her pa?

                                        -Phil in Kentucky
42

Abby (with all due respect),

You can tell by the way I use my walk I’m a woman’s man.

No time to talk,

B.G.

43

Dear Abby,

I’m just an average guy, with an average life. I work from nine to five, hey hey I pay the price! All I want is to be left alone in my average home, but why does it always feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone?

Paranoid in Peoria

44

Dear Pinkie,

If you expect to have dessert, make sure you finish your main course (or at least the meat).

Abby

45

Dear Abby: What’s love got to do with it? What’s love but a second hand emotion? Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken–Ida Mae Bulloch in Mississippi

46

Dear Warren -

Well, aren’t you pitiful? How about you join me in L.A.?

Abby

47

Dear Abby,

i’m scared of swimming in the sea
dark shapes moving under me
every fear i swallow makes me small
inconsequential things occur
alarms are triggered
memories stir

it’s not the way it has to be

Right?

–PG

48

Dear Abby,

I am driving on 85 in the kind of morning that lasts all afternoon, just stuck inside the gloom. 4 more exits to my apartment, but I am tempted to keep the car in drive and leave it all behind. Cause I wonder sometimes about the outcome of a still verdictless life.

Signed,

John in Georgia

49

Dear Dick and Donna:

So many people have requested the recipe for “MacArthur’s Park” I’ve decided to print it here:

MacAuthur’s Park
1 gallon tub sweet green icing…
…Baking time: One century

50

Dear Abby:
I can’t get no satisfaction.

  • Roland “Stone” Phillips
51

Dear Roland,

See post 6.

Doubly,

Abby

:wink:

52

Dear Peoria:
Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean people aren’t out to get you. You’re being watched. Abby

53

D’oh!

54

Dear Abby,

Wait a minute, shake your arm! Then use your form. Stay on the scene like a sex machine.

Sincerely,
Funky Macon

55

Dear Abby,

   When I was young and my heart was an open book, I used to say "live and let live." But this ever changing world in which we live in has made me give in a cry. So, now I say "live and let die."

  Is that wrong of me?

                                   -Mac in Liverpool
56

Dear Mac,

What does it matter to you? You’ve got a job to do, and you’ve got to do it well.

57

Dear Abby,

I can’t seem to face up to the facts. I’m tense and nervous, and I can’t relax. Qu’est-ce que c’est???

DB from CBGB

58

Dear Abby,

I had a girl, and Donna was her name. When she left me, I never was the same. Oh I love my girl…

Where can she be?

Signed,

Richie V.

59

Dear Chrissy A.,

Always remember to tell yourself that you’re beautiful.

–Abby

60

Dear High,

Remember to just let the days go by. Things like this happen only once in a life time.

–Abby