Save your bank account; you might decide you want to buy me a present, and then where would you be?
Buy an acceptable pair of tin snips and remove the hooks.
Why the fuck is Chevrolet running a commercial for the Traverse that shows a dog chowing down on chocolate cereal that has spilled on the floor???
Never mind. My personal parody button is clearly broken.
I can’t decide if this review is my favorite or this one.
What are “Priesthood Children!!”?
Lots of commercials show the dog cleaning up the floor that way.
They really do. I think my favourite one is the women with 20 kids who can’t afford her anti-psychotic meds and is living under a bridge and selling her children. 
My favorite part is the 24% discount. Only $114.48.
WHAT A BARGAIN!
I just chatted with my 7 year old son for 20 minutes. About his testicles. I really hope I didn’t fuck it up because I was really slap-happy from a bizarre day at work. The last think I needed was to talk about balls for 20 minutes.
Yes, that’s completely mini, but I’m having one of those days that’s so up and down - at work and personally - it’s grown comical. Which is why I’m slap-happy.
Oh, speaking of, my mom was put on the transplant list for a new liver. Yay!
She also has an autoimmune disorder that is making her sicker, needing a transplant sooner. Boo!
But the transplant will take care of her autoimmune disorder since it’s related to her liver. Yay!
Fuck it. I’m going to be happy she’s on the damn list, try to make her feel good and go the fuck to bed before something else happens.
I think the concern is that it is chocolate cereal and chocolate is poisonous to dogs.
Meh, chocolate is expensive so I bet that cereal is a whiff of chocolate and a whole lotta dark food coloring.
alphaboi867, create a new account and start over. It’s that easy.
It took three accounts for me to finally get health insurance…
When one goes belly up you have to let it go, man, because it’s gone.
And the answer is: Freezing Rain.
How do I know this? It’s freezing rain right now, and that’s the stupid symbol being shown. Followed by snow, snow, sleet, snow, snow, snow. sigh
If you talk to him again about that region of his body, I would avoid using the word ‘mini’.
I want to know what they were talking about. I’ve never talked to my son about his balls. Did I mess up?
I think the second one you linked has the advantage of being understandable to a much wider audience, but yeah, they’re both things of beauty.
Dude with whom I am having a disagreement over policy (in which I am right):
You can’t take a state statute, change words to completely different words to reflect your own desires, and say “The way I read it is…”
If that’s the way you “read it”, then you have a very non-traditional method of reading.
The Customer Images are good too.
I just saw Bill Nye, the Science Guy, on the same program as Jenny McCarthy, enemy of science and baby-killer. I hope he took the opportunity to take a shot at putting a little science in her empty blonde head.
Was it ‘The View’? If so, I wouldn’t expect any hard hitting anything from there. After all, they still have that idiot Sherri Shepard on and they also had Elisabeth Hasselbeck They were probably just talking about his stint on ‘Dancing with the Stars’.
Good point. 
So here’s how the conversation went:
He asked, “Mom, what are my balls for? The ones under my penis? Are they really called balls?”
I explained they were called testicles. Well…that started a whole slew of questions. How are they attached? He’s certain that they’re attached with wires. Do testicles bleed? Why the hell would he ask that (I asked in my head anyway)? What are they used for? What are they made of? How far can you roll them around without them stopping? Do they come out of the sac/scrotum?
I thought about calling his dad, but knew that’d be a total cop-out. So I answered his questions as best I could while trying not to giggle. Especially when he asked if they came out and whether he could play with them. I said, “Um, sure, just not in front of me.”