Decemberrants: Yule post'em here, plz

Better go back and say “You remember that thing I said about you not playing with your balls in front of me? Don’t play with them in front of anyone, ok?”

And emphasize that NO, they do not come out! :eek:

I think I also said that’s something you do only in private when no one is in the room with you. :slight_smile:

But yes, the fact that they don’t come out like a coupla marbles and the fact that those are private only probably bears repeating.

Let me just say that I hate people who focus too much on “attitude” and are too quick to call people “negative.” No bitch, I’m being realistic. Not everything in fucking life is peaches and cream and sometimes I’m not in a good mood. If everything has to be presented to you with a massive sugar coating then you’re the one with the problem, not me.

Unfortunate artifact of Human Nature. One I try to catch in myself, but alas, I too am Human.

It states: “If I don’t like you, or something you do, I am allowed to commit any offense against you in order to punish you, even if these things violate my own ethics.

Otherwise translated as “I think you’re a jerk, so I’m allowed to be an even bigger jerk to you!”

Took all the batteries out of my Halloween decorations today - I don’t know why those battery compartments have to be so hard to get into. Do they really need to be bolted down with four little screws?!?

The cover for my stove light is screwed in, too. Makes changing the bulb a bitch.

In the category of “my wonderful pets”, I went downstairs to the (finished) basement today for the first time in a very long time to discover that one of my cats is apparently not satisfied with a once-a-day box scooping. (Two cats. Two boxes. Cleaned out once a day.)

It’s kinda gross down there. I picked up as much as I could but some is dried on so hard I couldn’t pry it loose, and everything’s left a stain. And I’m supposed to have some people in tonight to look at windows and doors for maybe replacements, so I’m not only grossed out, I’m going to be incredibly embarrassed. :frowning:

ETA: Walkout basement. It’s got windows and a door, and I think the door has water damage. Stupid builder.

I’ve heard to have one more box than you have cats. :frowning:

They kinda do.

Otherwise, people in the store would just take the batteries out and turn them around so they wouldn’t have to listen to the damn thing in “demo” mode all day.

I agree. If the OP is worried about the “chocolate” part of the cereal, I doubt there is much there.

Preach it!

I wish Web 3.0 wasn’t so determined to go full-on tablet-ised, when only 35% of users are on devices. Websites should auto-detect what platform you’re on and deliver a site that is optimised for you. I don’t want to have to navigate some slidey blocky giant-fonted bullshit site just because a small number of visitors use their fingers for scrolling.

Or customers. That’s a bit of a holiday tradition for me. When I come across the shelves full of motion activated singing, dancing, banging things next to the clerks, I turn them off. If I can get to the batteries, I turn them around. I have gotten many a thankful hug from someone who had been listening to the noise all day.

When I got home tonight, Buttercup was sniffing around at the garbage can and when I opened the lid Lucky was there, just as happy as could be.

HA!! says me. I/we can finally see how he does it. I brushed the garbage off the cat, tossed him into the powder room and mentally rubbed my hands while I went into the office to look at the film. I just knew I’d be making millions on this video.

And then learned that my beloved husband had focused the camera on the lid of the can, not on the side.

I get what you’re saying, but I don’t like it. I can’t keep my batteries in the stuff year round, so every year, it’s open 15 screwed-down compartments to put them in, then open them again to take them out. Gaaaaah!

Yep.

That’s probably true; it’s just not a behavior that should be encouraged as “cute”. And in looking around online, it seems most people are far more disturbed by that commercial’s plot (a girl’s freaky - looking stuffed toys come to life) than they are by the dog’s actions.

Slew of little things have already gone wrong this morning:

  1. Both my children decided to take very long poops this morning. This put us behind schedule and yet they still dawdled!
  2. I have forgotten my credit card on a day when I am making a large deposit on our corporate christmas party.
  3. My soon to be ex-husband does not seem to get what 50% custody is. He wants more than that. Also, he fails to see why it is important that a parent (not a sitter) get them off to school on as many days as possible.
  4. My children both have hockey games at the same time tomorrow. I am good but I can’t be in two places at once.
  5. My son’s birthday party is tonight and his aunt who is making the cake is sick and isn’t coming. No cake! Arg!

I hate it when it’s dark, below zero, wind chills in the -20 range, and the roads are covered with stupid motherfuckers who think it’s dangerous to move more than 10mph, even in a 45 zone, with fucking NO ONE in front of them.

My fifth grader is in the running club at school. They’re running in a charity race tomorrow.

Would it kill the running club organizers to send an e-mail out to their (already set up) mailing list with the time and place we need to take our kids to gather for the big race Saturday?

I sent an e-mail asking for this info and got a note back saying “we gave this out at Wednesday’s meeting” before giving me the time and place. NB: Wednesday’s meeting was an extra one they scheduled at the last minute, and conflicted with a school choral concert in which my daughter (and presumably a fair percentage of the running club kids) were performing.

WTF people, don’t schedule an extra meeting against a giant school event, confine vital information dissemination to it, and then passive-aggressively bitch at me for not sending my kid. And regardless of all that, why not send an e-mail anyway, rather than depending on a bunch of 7-10 year olds to transmit it properly? It’s a batch e-mail, not a set of hand-calligraphed invitations, for Pete’s sake!

Attention people who want to hire writers. Do NOT offer a lousy five bucks and smug instructions like the following. We write shit like this for one reason and one reason only: to make some money. We don’t write for the delight of crawling up your ass.

Note the bolded part. Bear in mind these articles go under his name on his dumb fuck website to make him money. So what the fucking fuck does this shit think people are writing them for? The opportunity for self-expression? The chance to win a Pulitzer? Fame and glory?

I swear to god this is why many kids don’t value writing. Because they know writers get all the respect of Mickey D workers and substitute teachers. And about the same damned compensation sometimes.

By his own criteria, he couldn’t sell to himself since he obviously hasn’t a clue what he’s talking about. His mechanics suck rocks, to boot.

It’s amazing how many people think that “anyone can write”. “Anyone” may be able to write, ducky, but there are damn few of us who write well, and that’s what you need when you’re publishing information to the potential multitudes rather than dashing off a note to a buddy.

Kiddo’s pre-school Christmas program is tonight. He had to learn a few songs, the normal stuff, one verse each. So, a total of maybe 3 minutes worth of songs?

There are several different classrooms, so I guess they each have their own thing. Ok, fine.

It starts at 7. That seems a little late to me. You’re starting a program with a bunch of kids who may very well be getting in the bath at 7 on a “normal” night like mine does.

I just found out it goes until NINE FUCKING FIFTEEN.

So, you’re talking abouta bunch of 4 year-olds who aren’t even getting home until at least 9:30. We live a little over a half an hour away, so I’ll be lucky to have him in bed by 10.

What the fuck kind of planning is that?? Have it on a Saturday afternoon, fer chrissakes.