Pfft.
You should notice, Johnny Bravo, that you haven’t had any contact with any other countries. They are running away from France like roaches from the light.
Does this mean I’m comparing Bravo’s France to a beacon of light in the midst of disgusting roaches? :eek:
Maybe I am . . . . 
The adjustments are in, and the new webpage is ready
Heh heh. Who is it whose advertising campaign goes (roughly) “you miss a little, you miss a lot!”? That’s how I feel here. No time for the slamming about of egos like last time (at least not yet), but let’s just say it’s an interesting map. And I love the chatter in this game. I think we’ll end up with some hardcore players out of this group. Hopefully even Austria is having fun (it’s so damned long to write out Whack-a-Mole that I just can’t be bothered) and learning something. Don’t worry France, your time will come (or it won’t, and you’ll run away with this thing).
I can’t wait to see what happens next.
(On Preview, I hadn’t even noticed that Winter had already come and gone… jeez there’s a lot of French, Turks and Italians in this Universe!)
Yo, Italy. Your Lepanto isn’t fooling anybody.
Yo, Turkey. Lepanto, Schmepanto. I just want to sell Pizza to the Balkans. Pizza and cheap red wine.
Yo, Italy. What’s the deal with that fleet in Naples? I assume it’s going towards France, right?
Yo, Turkey. Shh…don’t give the French any ideas. No, Mr. Frenchie, don’t listen to that Turkish man. He’s confused. Confused, I say.
Advice:
France: Wheeeeeeeeeee! I suggest having the servants send messages to the other countries demanding immediate surrender. You can go north or south. The south looks very crowded, so the north is the best bet. Who will be your first victim: England or Germany? I also advise pretending to be friends with the guy you don’t attack first. Tell him that once you’ve killed his neighbor, you’ll leave him completely alone.
England: You have no out-and-out enemies yet, an enviable position. You have your pick of allies…Germany, France or Russia. None are in a position to attack you, yet you are in position to at least annoy all of them. Demand some neutral centers from everyone, or perhaps stab someone.
Germany: The lurch south has left you badly exposed to England and France. The best news is that Russia is in real trouble, although he cleverly sacrificed Sweden. But he can still cause you problems. I advise getting one more unit back north. Remember, Russia is going to lose Sevastopol this turn. Their only prospect of getting a build is taking one of your centers. So defend yourself…but remember that attacking the enemy homeland is just as effective as keeping him out of your homeland.
Russia: You are in trouble, you’ve lost the South. Write it off, and concentrate on the North. You’ve got to make a truce with either Germany or England, and grab some centers to make up for your losses. Play aggressively, you’ve got nothing to lose. Your advantage is that you are playing in Germany’s backyard, rather than him playing in yours.
Turkey: All those fleets are a signal to everyone that you are planning a Med strategy. Nothing wrong with that, just remember that Turkey has the most difficulty developing his units, since they must be built waaaaaay back in the corners. Take Sev, consider offering Austria client state status. He will absorb the punches of Germany and Italy, while you pick off undefended centers with your fleets.
Austria: You aren’t in such a bad position…provided that you can get some allies. Turkey is the most likely candidate. All those fleets are a threat to Italy and eventually France, but not so much to you. I advise groveling. The other thing is that there are many units against you, but they are from many different countries. Is Russia going to cooperate with Germany? I don’t think so. In fact, Russia is more likely to help you against Germany, no matter what they were scheming last turn.
Italy: You are in good shape for now. Aggressive play has got you the elusive 2 build opening. And a unit in Serbia is very valuable, since so much depends on leverage. That guy is a sniper behind enemy lines and can cause all sorts of grief. Even if you’re dislodged, your retreats can still cause trouble. That one unit will tie up many times more enemy units attempting to defend against it. But watch out for Turkey. A two fleet build is a clear signal that he’s coming after you.
Just one question for the Newbie players. Anyone feeling paranoid yet? Just asking. 
I’m only paranoid because all the other players are out to get me.
Sniper or near future roadkill? Guess it all depends on your perspective.
Having been there (and still there) I can say without equivocation everyone IS out to get me! The only reason France and England haven’t joined the gang-rape is simply that they couldn’t get to the party fast enough. I’m sure when they do arrive they will attempt to make up for lost time. :eek:
How’s that for paranoia?
Remember, units are only disbanded due to lack of support. You can force a unit to retreat, but you can only destroy it outright if there are no valid spaces for it to retreat to.
How ironic.
I’m not paranoid. After all, I’ve got Luigi and Giuseppe and Mario and Mario’s elder brother.
Mario’s elder brother is named Giovanni.
Once again. Austria. I’m not out to get you!
England is thouroughly uninterested in the matters of the south. Its those damn Germans/French/Russians that really get me going…
England is thouroughly disinterested in the matters of the south. Its those damn Germans/French/Russians that really get me going…
Oh don’t you EVEN get me started!!!
I will come up there and stick this cossack boot so far up your armada that your crumpets will taste like leather!
Worried about the French?
I don’t see why anybody should be worried about the French. We haven’t even attacked anyone!
It’s just an obsession by the media. Pay it no mind.