So it appears that my wife is toying with the idea of a divorce. No doubt I have my faults, and I am willing to work on them. It also seems clear that I would come out on top of this matter. My wife doesn’t earn enough money to maintain a separate household, at least not by her demanding standards. I give our kids much more affection and affirmation that she does. She cooks their meals but apart from that all she does is yell at them for not meeting her expectations. I am ambivalent about staying with her, but I couldn’t bear being without my kids, and I think they would suffer for their parents being separated. We did well for the first 5 years of their life and I think it would be stupid to deal them such a blow right now.
Some who have followed my threads know that I have an issue drinking, which counts against me in this matter. All I can say is that I have never let my children see this side of me, I only do it late at night after they have gone to bed.
Also my wife was a ferocious drinker earlier in our marriage and still delights in verbally abusing me (which somehow I just tolerate it because I felt I had no better options). But in fact she still has anger issues and is abusive toward me and our kids. I feel very resentful that she can just blow her temper and issue strong demands whenever she feels like it, but if I suggest anything is wrong, then things are just hopelessly screwed and it’s time for us to separate. And she is exactly the type of person to go scorched-earth and poison the kids against me regardless of how it might harm the children.
I would happily leave her in a minute but I can’t leave my children. To complicate matters, she is a foreign national and our kids have dual citizenship in a country where they could simply disappear with me having no recourse to ever see them again.
At any rate, I don’t even know why I’m posting this. No legal advice will be adequate or applicable. But if you want to share your experiences I’ll be glad to hear them. It’s hard to imagine remaining married to this person, but impossible to imagine losing my kids. Any thoughts are appreciated.