Divorces Done Right - any nice stories?

This is second-hand, as I haven’t actually run into that particular cousin in ages, but my cousin Hank is separated from his wife and co-worker (they own a pharmacy), Melissa. In Spain it is very common for not-really-that-estranged couples to get separated but not divorced; divorce tends to happen in cases of either “I hate your guts” or “I want to remarry”. They have a three-homes arrangement, where the kids have stayed in their old house. They’re also still going out with the same groups of friends as before.

One of Littlebro’s friends is the ex (again, separated) of a friend of mine. Theirs is one of those cases of “I love you but after a while your quirks make me climb the walls”. Joint custody, their son lived with the mother but always could go to Daddy as needed (not for “he said it was ok!” games, those didn’t even work with his grandmas…).

I know other cases of amicable separations, but not the details of custody arrangements.

Wait… he divorced you without your knowledge? How is that possible?

My parents divorced when I was in college. Very amicable. After they decided to divorce, they shared a lawyer and my father sponsored her for a green card (US permanent resident) before they filed in order to finally get her legal status in the US sorted out. Nearly 20 years later they’re still friendly, though they’ve both moved on and they have lived hundreds or thousands of miles apart for most of that time.

They did (separately) wig out a little bit at me in the first couple of years. Not in a bad way, just that they were both freaking out at the end of a 20-year-plus marriage, and we all had a bit of a rough time, but we all thought the divorce was the right decision and it proceeded without any ill will.

When my mother had cancer, about 10 years after the divorce, my father flew to be with her for a couple of days, with the blessing of his current girlfriend (also a cancer survivor)—not out of passion, but just to make sure she had an advocate in the hospital system so she could focus on being a patient. That turned out fine, as well.

Get out the popcorn, this is a Jerry Springer sort of deal =)

My first and second mrAru were stationed on the same sub, and roomies in barracks. I met both of them at Campaign HQ where we all played D&D and assorted other games. I dated both of them simultaneously, though mrAru 1 asked me to get married. I stopped dating mrAru2 [obviously] and actually was having second thoughts when we actually got hitched - but someone convinced me it was just cold feet [I should have ignored them.] It was more or less fine while he was still in the Navy, but he got out and we both started working in the nuke industry. That is where it sort of went mentally abusive.

See, we decided about a year before he got out to buy a house. For some stupid reason of banking, the bank he used refused to let me have any sort of access to his accounts. No check writing, no early form of ATM card, no credit cards. Despite the fact that my exroomie was the one that was convicted of stealing my checkbook and passing bad checks. So we decided I was going to stop working the nuke contracts, and the house we bought really needed renovation. The problem started when we hit a money disbursing issue. He didn’t have the time to work on the house while he was working the contracts, they typically lasted 2-3 months and were away from Tidewater VA. When he wasn’t working he had the time, but refused to spend any money. The mortgage automatically came out of his account, but the regular utilities [water, electricity, telephone] would be randomly turned off for nonpayment, generally while he was away on a contract because I couldn’t do anything about paying all the bills every month. We had mrAru2 and 3 or 4 different roomies over the course of a couple years - the ‘rent’ they paid was not adequate for me to eat and pay every bill every month. [except the water bill, that was quarterly and every damned time mrAru 1 swore he paid it before he left on contract]

[mrAru 2 was from a divorce home and his dad was a deadbeat that rarely paid his child support so mrAru1 had issues with money leaving his bank account.]

The straw that broke my back was pretty simple. A friend had given me a set of appliances that was effectively brand new - the apartment complex he was a manager for went condo and all the apartments got a renovation, and all the appliances even the ones that had just been replaced got thrown away. While mrAru1 was away on contract, I had been given enough money for Christmas to buy the stuff to redo the floor and cabinets in the kitchen with the basic builder grade cheap crap from the local big box hardware. All mrAru 1 needed to do was supply the elbow grease, and rental for stuff like the floor sander, and little odds and ends, probably a hundred or so in adhesive, nails, stuff I knew I didn’t know that I needed. So off I went to visit my mom and dad, we had a cousin that was getting married and mrAru didn’t like going to weddings [neither do I, but family is family]

I came home to a house that was FULL of dust, mold and mildew kicked up by sanding the ancient kitchen floor, and the kitchen itself an empty shell as all the base cabinets had been pulled out. As I stand in the living room having an asthma attack, mrAru 2 [who had been at sea and got home pretty much as I was getting home] shoved me out the door and put me up in a motel overnight. He cleaned the stairwell, and the entire upstairs of the dust and crap, and barriered the base of the stairs with heavy plastic to keep the crap downstairs. I moved back into the upstairs of the house. Luckily, the only bathroom in the house was upstairs. mrAru2 bought me a cube fridge, a brand new coffee maker, a hotplate and washed up my favorite la creuset pan [the one that has the 3 qt sauce and the 9 inch skillet as a combination] and a set of stuff to eat off of, and bought me a fridge of groceries [and kept me supplied with groceries for the next 6 months.] By the time that mrAru was rotating up to Groton [9 months] the dust and crap still had not been cleaned up by mrAru1, the kitchen had not gotten finished, and I was seriously peeved at mrAru1.

We sat down and discussed his passive-aggressive bullcrap. I pointed out that his issue with prying any sort of operating budget for me out of his bank account, and his behavior about working on the house was driving me insane and if we were going to remain at least friends something had to change. He decided that his issues were not going to get better, and we decided to get divorced. At the same time, mrAru2 was living with a girlfriend who couldn’t manage to deal with mrAru1’s passive aggressive crap and they had moved out. She was driving mrAru2 nuts, and he dear johned her while on a short med run, so she took his car and got both a MC and Visa in his name, using his power of attorney and maxed them out on vacation to Disneyworld in Florida.

mrAru2 asked me if I wanted a fresh start up in Groton with him, I said yes. mrAru1 and I did the separation paperwork, he kept the house and car, I kept my IH scout and half the furniture, half the bank account and all my remaining stuff [I had gotten my storage locker broken into and most of my stuff stolen, and a lot of my gaming stuff had been stolen by the same roomie that also stole some checks and bounced them all over Norfolk.] and off we went to Groton. Divorce got finalized, and mrAru1 and the former GF of mrAru2 brought the paperwork up, and hung around for the wedding. They named their first daughter after me.

We really do get along much better as friends than as spouses.

My divorce was a hell of a lot more amicable and mutally respectful than the marriage. Even as we were making our cases in divorce court (no attorneys, we did the agreement and paperwork ourselves) we were yucking it up. Judge seemed confused about us wanting to split up, but we were both quite clear that this needed to happen. I want to say we made it amicable because of the children. The real reason though is I’m not vindictive–I just wanted to get away from her. That was 3 years ago. I’m married now and the three of us are actually pretty cordial when events draw us all together. It’s been good for the kids in many ways. I didn’t force the ex to sell the house and split the equity, so the only immediate change was the creation of another household. New wife has a job so Daddy lives with her in a house too, not an apartment like he’s just an appendage to the real home occupied by Mom. And best of all, we all communicate so when one of the kids is running amok, the other house knows what to watch out for. It’s still hard for the kids to go back & forth, but they mix it up and get breaks from each other. The only thing that troubles me is I am no longer obligated to pay for ex’s house in 7 years–but I’m still on the title & the loan, and I don’t see her ever being able to refinance me off the loan. So I might take a hit when I stop paying for it. I suppose that’s why folks get lawyers.

It’s a default divorce. I was served w/ the papers showing my husband filed but I never had to sign anything or appear anywhere. He had his lawyer mail me a copy of the judgment and nowhere in it does it mention my agreement or assent to the divorce or even knowledge thereof.

Emotional aspects aside, my divorce went fairly smoothly even though we’d just bought our first house together five months before we decided to split up. Probably the most difficult part of the process was the fact that I’d hired a lawyer (only because it was free to me and I figured it would be wiser than trying to navigate unfamiliar forms on my own), and the lawyer turned out to be fairly incompetent and unprofessional, pissing off both me and my ex and making the whole thing harder than it needed to be. I eventually dropped him. He seemed determined to make the divorce contested (possibly to try to earn more money) when there was nothing at issue.

But my ex and I did not have any arguments about dividing property or anything like that. She opted to stay in the house while I moved out, and eventually, the house got sold (which she handled most of). Nobody went after anybody else’s money. There were no kids involved. We spoke to each other civilly when something needed to be handled. All in all, a fairly clean process. And now, we have no ties and have moved on with our lives.