I agree.
Pure intelligence is way overrated. I would much prefer a semi-literate/semi-articulate woman who was honest & moral to an overeducated, thinks-she-knows-it-all “intellectual” type.
Slight hijack, but intellectuals really annoy me. It’s simply an act some insecure people use to cover up the fact that they’re not very bright to begin with.
I resemble that remark and will not be degroded by your comments. I got over a thousand points on the SAP.
Amen, Crafter_Man. Anyone who labels themselves as an intellectual is probably not anyone I want to befriend. Yap all you want about anti-elitism being its own brand of elitism…I don’t buy it. Branding yourself an intellectual is haughty and smug.
I’m smart. I’ve always been smart. So what? I don’t have to say I am. I don’t need to go out of my way to prove it. I don’t hide my light under a barrel, either. Regardless of what other things they thought about me, every guy I’ve dated, even briefly, has commented that they thought I was bright. Every employer I’ve had has thought so as well. Is this because of in-depth discussions of US foreign policy, the nature of art, or quasars? Well, sometimes, but I firmly believe that intelligence comes through best in the way you speak and the way you carry yourself, even in the course of a casual conversation.
In fact, I’ve found out that the quickest way to turn off would-be suitors in social situations is to say, “Men are intimidated by my intellect.” I’ve used that exact phrase. Usually they can’t get away fast enough. I don’t think, however, that it’s that I am smart, it’s that making a point of saying so is a not-so-subtle way of lording it over people. Worship me, I am an intellectual! The guys that don’t run off call me on my bullshit, and we get along. I’ve met some interesting people that way.
I realize that this is merely my own experience, but I have never had problems attracting men, and I have never had anyone dump me because I was “too smart for them.” My brains are simply part of the whole package. If they’re not interested, it’s probably something else.
" My brains are simply part of the whole package. If they’re not interested, it’s probably something else."
I like that statement because in some guys they have a ‘package’ & when they unzip their pants, sometimes
their brain falls out 
Agree, Gundy. And that’s what bugs me about the OP. She sounds like someone who flaunts here supposed “intellectualness,” and then wonders why she can’t get a date. In other words, it ain’t the fault of “men who don’t like smart women.” More likely, the real answer is staring back at her in the mirror…
I do not understand this persistent anti-intellectualism. One is an intellectual based on how one leads his private life and chooses to spend his leisure time, not by his lack of social graces.
I confess. As much as I may try to deny it, I am an intellectual. I like to think about things. I read a lot of books, most of which are nonfiction. I like to translate Roman philosophy in my spare time. I have plenty of opinions, and some of them are even fairly considered. And if you want to talk about them, I’d be happy to.
It is comments like:
and
…that I find especially irritating.
It is only haughty and smug if the “brander” implies some sort of value judgment. Some people brand themselves “practical”; is this not equally haughty and smug? In the world of good and bad, it makes no moral difference whether I choose to read in my spare time rather than fix up old cars, for example, and I certainly do not believe that I am a more valuable person for it.
And if that is enough to ruin any chances I might have of befriending you, well, have a nice life. It’s my private life, and if it offends you (speaking generally here), too bad.
I suspect that the complaint is not against “intellectuals” but against pedants and people who uncontrollably gush in social situations when it is not appropriate to do so. Opinions are like assholes: everyone’s got 'em, but it’s usually impolite to show them to others unless they ask first.
So if we meet in a bar, no, I am not going to go on an on about the United States’ incoherent energy policy or the bit of Seneca I translated last night. That’s not intellectual, it’s just fucking rude.
YMMV
MR
You make a fine point. Kindly, then, allow me to amend my statement. Many self-described intellectuals are in fact boorish pedants. Those folks I don’t want to know. There is no interest or pursuit that is so obscure or academic that it offends me - absolutely not. Those are the things that make people interesting. But - those people who think that their individual pursuits grants them a lofty status, I don’t want to know.
But now I’ve gotta ask - have you, Maeglin, been rejected for being too smart? You say you try to deny being an intellectual (you know, that distinction bugs me, too - AN intellectual, instead of just intellectual) - are you just joshing, or does the stigma attached to the label concern you enough to want to reject it?
It’s simply that I’ve met a lot of people (again, my own experience talking) who write off their lack of social success to others’ inability to handle their greatness. Insecurity or arrogance? I don’t know. I attribute my lack of social success (outside of dating, that is) to my lack of social grace. Could be I’m wrong. Could be I’m not as smart as I think I am. Who knows? Are people who reject you for anything you can’t help worth pining over? Decidedly not.
Thanks, and in retrospect I realize I came on a lot stronger than I had intended.
My name is Maeglin and I am a boorish pedant. It has been nearly two years since I last indulged myself in a socially innapropriate way.
Quit it, you pervs. 
I am still in recovery, so I am fairly sensitive about these issues.
As for the quoted portion, I agree completely. I quickly glaze over amid people who are more interested in declaiming than in communicating. I don’t want to be that guy anymore, cause the truth is, it ain’t pleasant.
That is a good question. I think being an “intellectual” carries with it several lousy connotations. I am not living the beatnik life: I do not sit around in coffeehouses, use vacuous words, and pretend I am staring intensely at something. Nor do I really find myself at home with “intellectual” left-wing fringe groups, always trying to overthrow the patriarchy. Nor am I particularly bohemian in outlook or lifestyle. And I am certainly not an “intellectual” science geek: no pony tail, I bathe regularly, and I do not own a single Linux t-shirt.
So since I don’t feel that I really share in these usual characteristics of “intellectuals,” I am not really all that concerned about the connotations the label itself carries.
I think I just am what I am, really. If I could describe myself in ten words, “intellectual” would probably not be one of them. I deny it both in jest and in truth. I did not choose this label myself so I am less likely to accept it.
As for being rejected for being too smart, well, I honestly do not know. I have never had a girl tell me I was too smart, that’s for sure. Any time girls comment on my intelligence, it is usually more along the lines of, “what did you do that for, you dumbass?!?!?!”
Now that is just sad. For some time I wrote off my own lack of social graces to being “different.” That worked fine when I was a kid. That even worked fine during high school, since everyone is still working their own stuff out.
Now I am two years out of college. Still socially behind. But in the past year I made the amazing discovery that it is no one’s fault but my own. So rather than blunder around being my usual self, I thought it might be a good idea to watch other people and figure out how they do it. Some things come very naturally to me; others, like socialization, do not. But in a year I have learned a pretty fair amount. I can even dress myself and go out in public without being a total nuisance.
So I think that writing off social ineptitude for most adults is neither arrogance nor insecurity necessarily, but most definitely a failure to take responsibility for how one behaves. Save truly serious cases, of course. I am talking about boors, asses, and moderately shy people, not those with clinical problems.
Regards,
MR
I think part of the problem is when SOME people define themselves as being an intellectual, rather than letting their interests describe them. I do not know the OP, so I will not judge there. Some “intellectuals” place themselves above everyone except their narrowly-defined peers. Everything is aimed at the mind. Other people have some scholarly interests, but those Roman texts share a room with fencing gear and RPG books. Much more rounded.
The first bore me. The second I can sit and have a beer with.
Some of the smartest people I know will pass up the Mesopotamian art exhibit for a hot dog and a beer in the bleachers once in a while.Maeglin, I wish I’d talked to you at ChiDope. This way, I could know for sure whether you were a boorish pedant or just a megaweenie.
-hijack- It never occurred to me before this thread that while I’ve not had difficulty meeting men to date, I have had difficulty making friends in party-type or work-type atmospheres. Just making the first conversational move is very hard for me. I’m fine when someone approaches me, but the trouble I find is that I assume anything I say will come out sounding, well, dorky. THAT, my friends, is lack of social grace. I need to work on that.
It’s funny - I’m exactly the other way 'round. But then again, baseball IS the mathiest sport of all. Can’t get more geeky than math, can you?
How about the Mesopotamian art exhibit with a hot dog and a beer?
I think Gundy will tell you sometimes you want the ambiance of the museum on Central Park West, and sometimes the ambiance of the bleachers off Waveland Ave.