Do you deserve what you have? Do you feel you deserve what you've got?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Now, I understand these are two very different questions, but for the purposes of this thread I’m hoping they will intermingle like the sons of God did with the sons and daughters of Eve in the Old Testament, that is largely and mysteriously.

Anyway, I think the question is rather self-explanatory. Given your current effort and talent, do you feel that fate has shone fairly upon you? Maybe you feel that it’s no Satan’s asscrack, nay, perhaps Fortune has shone Her fair nibblies upon thee; that’s fine. I wish we all could claim such a great end. If the last few sentences make no sense, then what I mean is that I want everyone to please state whether or not they feel they deserve their lot in life or not.

Personally, I think I’m getting exactly what I deserve. I don’t believe in Karma, but I think given the effort I’ve put into life, I’m getting a much more than fair bargain out of the (non-existent) deal. For my remaining years, I want to use my musical gifts up to their last drop. 10 to 1, I will fail, but I want to have a career matching or surpassing Lea Salong. I love singing, and I love life and all its trials and tribulations. I’d give my left kidney to have enough talent to join a theater group and go from there… Sooner or later, there will be no more me left to enjoy this cosmic paradise, and I want to dance and sing and shake all the mudsticks to their core! Michael Jackson is one of my heroes for that very reason… He had a crap-ton of personal problems, but he knew how to make people hope and believe in a life worth living. He made this meaningless whirlpool sing. That is my one true goal~

So let’s rock!

2

That’s a really complicated question.

In some respects, I deserve what I’ve got - considering the trials and tribulations I’ve caused other people, KWIM? I’m getting back in spades what I created when I was inconsiderate, disrespectful, rude, mean.

In other ways maybe I don’t deserve all the good things I get. Or maybe I do, I don’t know.

Some days I feel unappreciated, as if I work and work for nothing, nobody appreciates what I do.

Other days I feel as if there’s nothing I can’t do if I put my mind to it.

I don’t love life, I think it mostly sucks. I’ll be grateful to get off this bus.

3

Hmmmm…

Well, sorry but I think that the statement above comparing effort and talent and “fate shone fairly” are not necessarily statements that go together.

To me, what a person gains through effort and talent is earned not merely given. What fate provides (again imho) is aside from what a person has worked for on their own. They’re sort of like the icing on the cake and are gifts.

That said, in light of how hard I’ve worked in my life. I have both earned and deserve what I have (though sorry, I don’t see the difference between the two questions).

4

That’s my general summation.

I tried to type up a longer response but this is a really tricky question to answer accurately, IMO.

So hi5 Auto.

5

“Do you deserve what you have?” I interpret “have” as things you were given. “Do you deserve what you’ve got?” I interpret “got” as things you’ve taken for yourself (eg, earned).

6

I appreciate what I’ve got - does that count? :slight_smile:

7

Big question.

There are many things that I have that everyone deserves, but few people get. I will never, ever, take for granted that my passport is made of gold and my money is good everywhere. I walk to the front of lines that most of the world is stuck in the back off, all due to where I happened to be born. This is an amazing bit of good fortune. Much of the world is stuck where they are, with no hope. It’s slightly embarrassing when I talk of my travels to my students- they still have trouble moving to different parts of their own country.

Furthermore, I have the opportunity to choose what to do with my life. I can choose if, when, and who to marry. I can work any number of jobs, with few barriers. I can move cities as I wish. Few things hold me back. I can go back to school, or I can change careers as I wish. Really, America is an amazing place.

I have good health. Once again, everyone deserves this, but too few people get it. A real blessing.

Overall, I just feel fortunate. I have done the right thing, tried to be good to people, worked hard. etc. But nothing I can do will ever justify how privileged my life is compared to pretty much everyone else.

8

OK y’all are right; the question is not self-explanatory. Answer it anyway please!

9

I didn’t do anything to earn a comfortable upper middle class life and a loving family, because I was born into them. I try to show my gratitude as best I can, but no, I don’t “deserve” that any more than anyone else deserves the circumstances of their birth.

I feel I deserve my place at a high-ranked university because I worked hard to get here. I feel I deserve the loyalty of my friends (wonderful human beings that they are!) because I’ve shown the same caring for them.

I probably don’t deserve my relatively good health, because I don’t take the best care of myself (don’t exercise, don’t always watch what I eat).

10

This is what I thought of when I first read the question.

Most people in the history of the world are born into horrors that I cannot imagine so it’s hard to say what one “deserves” and what one doesn’t.

Even in this country I feel I was born very lucky with two parents who wanted me desperately and raised me with love, attention, support, and kindness. My upbringing allowed me to go on to achieve the things I’ve wanted to do and have the life I have.

I work for what I do have and feel like I give back enough to “deserve” it. It makes me sad to read that people are unhappy with their lives :frowning: I love my life and don’t think I’d trade places with anyone if I could. Life is never perfect, but I think it’s a gift as cheesy as that sounds.

11

Deserve ain’t got nothing to do with it.

12

How does one come up with the bottom line of one’s life and the included efforts, rewards, talents, and the random circumstances of chance? But since it is a subjective question, I’ll give my considered answer…considered because I am old, and have mused on this topic a tad.

Overall, I think that I’ve done very well when measured in the objective measures of physical wealth, professional attainments. I came from a poor background and our family specialized in “non-formal education”; I am very comfortably retired and look back with pleasure on my professional performance. I have more than I ever would have dreamed in the first half of my life.
Could I have done more…yup!

More importantly, I have a stable and happy family, and enjoy my status as a patriarch. I have friends, am able to be physically active, and keep occupied with new pursuits and adventures.

Yes, I have tried to do what is called the right thing, and I’ve put in my best effort often. So I’m very happy with my reward/effort comparisons, but ultimately I know that a lot of people have done the right things with due effort, and have not able to get the rewards I enjoy. So on top of my self congratulations for what I’ve done is a realization that I’ve been incredibly lucky.

(But then I’m fat, bald, and old…so would you call that lucky?..just kidding, but with a point.

13

This is a big question that I can’t resist responding to, but don’t have time to do it real justice.

As a genetically normal white male American I won the lottery the day I was born. I was’t born on third base; I was born starting to slide into home plate. As was every other similarly situated person. Had I been female, I’d have been born a couple steps back from starting that slide into home. Non-white, a couple steps farther back again.

And any American, European, Aussie, Kiwi, Japanese, etc., who doesn’t bear that in mind isn’t paying attention to the realities of the whole world, not just their own cushy part of it.
Setting that aside and just considering myself versus other Americans working within the current American system / society, and my expectations in that milieu I can say that most of what I have today is the result of my own efforts. In fact I’ve been shot out of the success saddle 3 times now by forces utterly beyond my control and climbed back on a different horse each time. And driven that horse back to a different success.

So I think I deserve what I have. I also think that I’ve had a bit more bad luck than most people (in the cushy first world) should have to endure.

Then again, in keeping with a lot of the American ethos, I suspect my expectations for how much bad luck is anyone’s “fair” share is unrealistically optimistic. I think of getting slammed 3 times as about 2 times too many for one typical (first world) lifetime; Reality may be that 8 times is more like the average case.

I don’t mean this to sound like I’m only scoring my life on cash flow. That’s not it at all. As **even sven **put it, there are a lot of other social factors where I’ve been lucky to be born with a good hand, yet still played my hand well. Take the time to pick the right mate, avoid the temptations f excess, etc.

And finally, as **sunstone **said, there are a lot of people who are dealt a decent hand, play the game with decent skill & effort, and still come up with zilch instead of a decent payoff. that hasn’t been me (yet).
My bottom line: On a day-to-day basis I can find ways to see myself as short-changed by fate, fulfilling barely half my goals & plans and dreams. But a litttle more thought about the big picture brings me back to realizing I’ve got it better than 99+% of the world. Lucky indeed.

14

Missed edit window …
For clarity

Should read

15

As a woman I never cease to count my blessings in having been born in the West.

Unlike most of my sisters throughout the world, biology is not destiny for me. I cannot be sold into slavery, stoned for being adulterous, freely beaten and abused, married off at 12yrs of age. I can vote, I can attend school, most every job is open to me. I can rely on the protection of the law, I won’t watch half my children die of pour nutrition or bad water. I have access to abortion, safe and legal.

I celebrate two Thanksgivings, every year, in part, because I believe this alone deserves a whole day of thanksgiving unto itself.

16

I’m very lucky. I’m not rich or powerful, but I make a secure middle-middle class salary. I don’t love my job, but I don’t hate it. I have a wife who is smart and smokin’ hot, and two bright, adorable kids, and my job allows my wife to stay home with them.

My job was never in trouble during the recession. Our house did not flood this weekend (unlike some of our neighbors). I love both my parents and they were visiting us last week. I’m relatively healthy and have not had a lot of tragedy in my life. God is good to us and I am thankful.

Edited to answer the question: This is all way more than I deserve.

17

Somebody up there likes me.

I feel extremely blessed to live the life and be surrounded by the things I am. Especially when I see others that should be as deserving but have far less. But whenever I start to feel guilty about that I realize that I have chosen the right path, good education hard work and treat people as I’d wanted to be treated myself. So I’ve not shot myself in the foot but still an inordinate amount of good fortune has come my way for one reason or another. So yeah, I would offer that my degree of appreciation probably exceeds my sense of justification.

18

Yessiree. In a very Western-centric way, I’d suppose my answer is yes. I was born quite poor, but I went to a good college, got a job at a big company, and now I live comfortably. Had I put in this same, exact amount of effort in some other country, I’d be dead by now.

19

I have what I deserve.
Which isn’t much!

20

I don’t know about what I “deserve”. I think, on a worldwide standard, I’m doing a hell of a lot better than a lot of people with my level of intelligence. (Okay, I’m unemployed at the moment, but I’m about to get a masters degree from an excellent university, so I have my fingers crossed that that’s a temporary problem.) I always think about my counterpart - the Bulgarian teacher of English I was partnered with - when I was in Peace Corps. She is, if anything, smarter than I am, but I have so many more opportunities in life because of the differing circumstances into which we were each born.

So I’m pretty lucky.