Drawing battle lines at work

We all have to do it sometime, unless we’re in endless retreat never willing to stand our ground. Even before I took the job at the theatre I had heard stories of certain individuals, their territorialness and the ceaseless retreats of others. The office was quite well known as being sexist such that female employees all eventually burned out due to their being overlooked and snubbed on gigs and such.

I’m not going to lie, I’m an alpha male. When I’m in HM mode, my volunteers and employees quickly learn that I am in charge and if you question, you’d better be right. If you’re right, you’re right and we move on.

It’s been a long time since someone like me has taken my position. Before, the position was filled on a nightly basis by different people in a rotation, so no one had the “power” to take a stand. They just took whatever others told them. Now, I’m the only one doing my job (well, almost - I gave up Wednesday nights) and as such, I’ve got the power to draw the battle lines.

Up to this point, I haven’t needed to. I’ve staked my claim fairly well and had few issues with those others had warned me about. Tonight I let something go which came back to bite me.

It’s a comedy theatre, so when funny hats from the props backstage began appearing on my volunteers I didn’t stop it, in fact I didn’t even think about them possibly being needed by players. I doubt they were actually needed, the hats included a top hat I’ve always associated as a chimney sweep’s sort of hat, a sombrero and a fez. Sure, it’s possible a scene was diminished by their use, but I admit we shouldn’t have been using them, simply because they’re props for stage use - not because they were needed tonight.

The individual who brought up a complaint to me is a coworker, he’s a tier above me in our laxadasical chain of command, but not directly above me. He noted the need for props to stay backstage, and also that he felt our lobby should be more professional and that volunteers shouldn’t wear funny hats.

The kicker is that I wear a funny hat. Every night. I’ve got a trademark cowboy hat that I got at Spencer’s Gifts for $30. It’s painted black with hot rod flames along the bent rims. It’s too small for my head. But it gets me noticed and remembered, something house managers have trouble with usually.

So, if he has an issue with volunteers wearing funny hats then why doesn’t he have an issue with my wearing a funny hat? If he does have an issue with my wearing a funny hat, why has it taken nearly six months to come to light?

Like I said, I admit that wearing the prop hats was wrong, but I think him trying to define what my volunteers wear is wrong. He’s in charge of booking corporate gigs and (in theory) marketing. I’m the house manager in charge of… the house.

So, I’m drawing a battle line over hats. Here and now. It’s a small thing, but if I let him have this victory, it will only encourage him to move further and try to control more of what I do. He hasn’t faced someone like me. Even his boss, my boss’ boss, is not a confrontational kind of guy and will often bend.

What he hasn’t accepted yet is that I’ve got immense job security, I’d wager even more than he does. I may be newer, but my job is the shitty job, no one really wants my job - I do it for love of the theatre and I make it look like a piece of cake. His job is the cake job which he does shittily. He books corporate gigs and panders to groups. They’ll have a much harder time finding someone to do my job than they will to find someone do his job. That being said, I can also walk away. This isn’t my livelihood. I live a rent-free life. I can always devote myself to dad’s business or find a job elsewhere.

Some might think that this is me hosing the forum in testosterone and bullshit, but I assure you that I am not. This man has singlehandedly driven more than three people from working in the theatre, simply with his bullshit and antics trying to be self-important. Not this guy.

I believe the words are “I’m your Huckleberry.”

– IG

Why not just compromise at “All volunteers have to bring their own hat, and can’t use the props”?

Indeed, I would say to just sell the volunteers wearing funny hats as being a something they were doing to show respect towards you and that you think adds flavor to the joint (i.e. specifically tie their funny hats to yours so people would have to ask you to stop to make them stop.) BUT, tell your volunteers that they need to buy their own hats as the props aren’t theirs to use willy-nilly.

Compromise where it makes sense, don’t compromise where it don’t.

You’re both right, I had been planning that sort of thing. The issue is that he is trying to tell me what the volunteers can wear, and so that is what I’m going to address.

After a night’s sleep I’m a little calmer about it all, though I still plan to hold my ground.

– IG

Those long winter evenings must just fly by.

Is this about you being important or the well-being of the theatre?

glee has the only essential question. Can the talk about “battle lines.” This shouldn’t be about your ego or the other guy’s. This is about what is best for the business. If you think that it is a good idea for the volunteers to wear their own wacky hats, then “make an executive decision.” Be ready and willing to explain why to any one who is above you in status, but yield only to someone who is your boss or your boss’s boss, etc.

Do not involve any other department and don’t gossip or stir up bad feelings. Remain friendly.

Does the fact that we wear silly hats hurt business in any way? Not a chance. It’s an improv comedy theatre, our main logo color is orange, and our Artistic Director’s headshot involves him making a funny face. We’re not a straight laced theatre.

– IG