10 Things I Ate About You
Picnic At Hanging Roc
Sped
The Hose Whisperer
Men IV: The Awakening
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dagon
Jackie Brow
Quiz Sow
Ride of Frankenstein
Far From Heave
Office Pace
Barber Hop
The Holing
The Pin Panther
On Golden Pod
On Olden Pond
One that Hitchcock tried, but it didn’t have the impact he wanted:
The Bird
But if he’d known about EBay, he might have made:
The Bids
Or not…
Charles Bronson stars in an Alistair MaClean novel about a woman with a devastating figure:
Breakheart ass
And, of course, these movies would completely disappear:
**Z
X
$
(pi)
**
and **The Story of ** O and The Marquise of O would be harder to understand.
Oh, and I forgot
Q
Star Trek II - The Wrath of Han (crossover with Star Wars universe)
Rod House (Patrick Swayze’s gay porn debut)
[QUOTE=GilliganRod House (Patrick Swayze’s gay porn debut)[/QUOTE]
Complete with puppets from Avenue Q
E.
Buffy the Vampire Layer - A teenage girl’s quest to satisfy the forces of darkness
Red Dan - Russians invade. Only one man can stop them
Full Meal Jacket - A tailor makes custom clothing for all you can buffets.
The Goo Girl - She’s conflicted…and covered in slime
I S P - Owen Wilson and Eddie Murphy team up in a screwball comedy about Internet access.
The Princess Ride - As you wish, Princess…
Requiem For A Dram - fond memories of that last ounce of liquor
Targate - A team of scientists finds an ancient portal that sends everyone to the bottom of the La Brea Tar Pits.
Tim Bandits - Terry Gilliam directs this feature about a gang of crooks who keep kidnapping Tim Conway.
Wet Ho American Summer - Janeane Garofalo gets laid a lot at camp.
Apocalypse No - The sequel to the Bond thriller Dr. No, featuring Marlon Brando and Martin Sheen.
Ogma - Matt Damon and Ben Affleck are angels of Og.
Easy Ride - Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper have an uneventful trip.
Letch (Lech) - Chevy Chase is a dirty old man.
Goodfella - Ray Liotta is a lonely gangster with no crew and no prospects.
Even - Brad Pitt in an educational film about number theory.
Wingers - Wannabe pilots trying to get laid.
The Velocity of Gar - Some fish were born to swim fast…
A traditional Northern tale: Danes with Wolves
About an bookish industrialist in the 1940s: Schindler’s Lit
Noah’s kid brother joins a biker group: Riders of the Lost Ark
Multiple personalities who don’t get along: 12 Angry Me
Finally, this submarine is haunted: Das Boo
And O.
Lie and Let Die.
Mystery Me. (Could be an alternate title for Memento…)
Dad, Men Don’t Wear Plaid. (OK, I had to add punctuation for that to work, but, hey.)
Crewed.
Men in Back. (Wouldn’t be surprised if someone’s used that as a porn title already…)
Sider-Man. (Sponsored by the aluminum industry.)
Of course there’s a documentary on the Dutch dike collapse of 1953: The Big Seep
And another on the consequences of swimming violations: Fining Nemo
Chaplin meets Freud: The Id
One of the earliest transexual movies: Be-Hur (1925)
And the Canadian reunion of Mork and Mindy: Nanoo of the North
Pup Fiction “Hand me my wallet. The one that says ‘Bad Mutha Leg Humpa’ on it.”
What if a letter gets added? Crouching Tigger, Hidden Dragon “Because using the Green Destiny sword is what Tiggers do best!”
Peed
Runaway Ride
Animal Hose
The Drowning Poo
Mad Ma
Tee hee.
Little Man Ate
Shooing Fish
Be in John Malkovich (Actually, that’s the same movie.)
Goofellas
The Big Seep
Chintown
Raw eal (A poor speller drops out of college to open a sushi restaurant.)
I (Alternately, F.)
Hat Dreams May Come
8 Mil (A day in Eminem’s real life.)
Eternal Sunshine of the Potless Mind (About a clear-thinking but geeky high school student.)
How Green Was My Alley
And finally, the classic film about a small boy from a Mediterranean island who dreams of becoming the next Central-European synth-pop King:
The Maltese Falco!
–Cliffy
Next up on NetFix:
Bruce Willis is the late Princess of Wales in Di Hard. [If we could drop one more letter…]
Billy Wilder’s porn romp Some Like It Ho.
Christopher Guest’s Best in how?
Johnny Depp is ticked off in irates of the Caribbean.
Intrigue in the coastal real estate industry: Million Dollar Bay
Sodom and Gomorrah for the non-Hebrew speaker: Lot in Translation
Angry marathon runners: Chariots of Ire