I’m guilty, throw the freaking cuffs on me.
There are far better uses for handcuffs. For example, you can use them to suspend a basket of teabags from the water pipes on your ceiling.
Or secure Esprix, Doobieous, hastur, and the very cute Lyonnais boy I met on the metro last night together. Preparatorily, of course, to having my wicked way with them.
Oh, drat, I forgot that Spree is a top. Oh well, maybe we can work something else out.
I got so drunk last night that the first taxi driver I hailed refused to take me home. Yet I did not go to jail. I love this country, especially when I’m not in 'cuffs.
In my city & the one next to it, the cops arrest people for waiting for the cab to take them home if they are drunk outside.
One person I know got arrested when they went to a house to ask the person to call a cab for them to take them home, the person called the cops instead.