I love Beakman. It’s Mister Wizard for the MTV generation.
My husband has a deep and abiding loathing for Max & Ruby, especially now that our kid has picked up the word “disGUSting” from Ruby. And I have to agree, Ruby is a hyperconventional, controlling, self-centered bitch.
As for The Suite Life of Zach & Cody, I’ve never seen more than ads, but Dan Savage has a brilliant critique in Act 4 of this This American Life.
I like *Wonderpets *OK, too. I never realized they’d taught me the melody to Swan Lake until I heard it in other circumstances, and found myself singing in my head, “Do it your own way; Do it your own way, Ming Ming!”
Me too. I even had the board game! 
I watched Mr. Wizard, too. I got into trouble for trying to duplicate some of the experiments without parental supervision though.
I don’t know too much about kids shows nowadays, but I will say that Barney and the Boobahs disturb me greatly.
The Boombahs look like they want to eat my soul.
I love the fact they pay respect to their ancestor: the two penguins are named Don and Herb, after Mr. Wizard’s real name, Don Herbert.
He’s looking too much into that, just like he did Garrison Keillior. It’s just a ridiculous childhood crush which is always turned down. (At first, I thought he was going to say that Maddie and London are lesbians or something.)
Yeah. I hate that bastard! Can’t you just walk like a normal person? And thanks for making my wife make me wear a stupid “paper-cone” mustache for sex. Oh, yeah. We don’t have sex. Never mind.
Franklin. Now theres a show to get some hate behind. What a bunch of Berkenstock-wearin’ crap this is. Too dull to keep even a 3 year olds attention. And that theme song? I swear, Bruce Cockburn was forced to do that song by some sort of Canadian requirement of Citizenship. Musta done it in 3 minutes while squeezing out a dry turd.
Holy shit, Beakman is still on the air?! I remember watching that show when I was growing up. Damn.
Do they still have Lester, the guy in the rat suit? The best part was that he didn’t play a rat…he played a guy in a rat suit. For no reason! Why was he in a rat suit? Who cares!?
The best site on the web for stoners and toddlers alike. 
I have to admit…looks furtively around for the Mommy brigade…I really don’t like Elmo. Hate the little red hyper whiny beast, in fact. I used to love Sesame Street because they didn’t talk down to me as a kid, and now this? He’s annoying and infantalizing and of course he’s my toddler’s favorite. :smack:
Not just you. Both grandmothers are intent on the spoiling competion over Number One Nephew, who has become a Thomas grognard as consequence of having every dang Thomas toy there is. In all three sizes. :rolleyes:
Having had to watch the videos, and read the books, over and over again… Thomas is rather dim. And the other characters are petulant and mean, or are rather dim themselves, or are supposed to be Thomas’ friends but treat him rather shabbily. Not my idea of something you’d want a kid to learn and emulate – but the grandmas are going to rue their enabling, one day, methinks…
That one too. The Monster At The End Of This Book was a lovely little story with poor Grover. It was fun reading that with my nephew. The sequel, with horrid little Elmo, was just wretched.
I refuse to watch Sesame Street ever since Abby Cadabby showed up. Thank Og my daughter is now in school when it’s on.
Oh, I do agree. And now, whenever somebody turns around, my brain goes “turny, turny, turn turn…” I really dislike Elmo and what they’ve done to Sesame Street, which I used to love.
I like Oobi though. I’m probably the only person in the universe, but I think it’s a cute and clever show. Except Angus, who is creepy. And I like Bing and Bong, too! So there.
Hate Dora. Don’t watch enough TV to be able to name more, but I’m sure I’d hate most of them. Which is why we mostly watch Bear in the Big Blue House videos from the library.
My daughter never watched the Boobahs, for which I thank the gods every day. They look like giant walking uncircumsized penises and “boobahs”, around here, is slang for breasts. Too icky.
She did watch Max and Ruby. I kept hoping Ruby would lock that obnoxious little monosyllabic Max in a closet and then drown herself. And where were their parents?
I used to have a keychain I liked. One side had a picture of Barney with dynomite strapped to his back. The other side had purple chunks, with “Barney Rubble” written underneath.
I’ve been pretty much spared such things, living abroad (though it does amaze me the extent to which friends have mine have gone out of their way to actually figure out how to watch stupid American TV while living in Jakarta or Cairo or whereever). But I’ve had a small sample of two shows I found horrifying:
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I’m surprised no one has mentioned Teletubbies, but I guess that’s because it doesn’t fall under the rubric of educational. See, I think they ARE trying to teach kids something: the lesson is “TV is God. God is in You, and You shall worship God, the TV.”
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My son’s school did a musical play of “Schoolhouse Rock” and I thought I might have to burrow through the upholstery theater seats to escape. Unspeakable. There was one really fine song (about how a bill moves through Congress) and the rest? I’d rather eat guano than be forced to endure that “music” (hah) and those “lyrics” (snort) ever again.
I may have to completely reverse my position on TeleTubbies. If it preaches the truth of the Cathode Ray Tube, it can’t be that bad.
The Fox show Awesome Adventures comes on right after Beakman’s in my town. For some reason it carries the pre-show caveat that it’s not meant for people over 16. WTF.
It’s basically about a host who’s horseshit at ad-libbing that gets sent to exotic locations, always with a new local female co-host. It has the E/I label running throughout, but there’s zero educational value here. It’s all just an excuse to see the co-host in a bikini on waterslides and jet-skis.
Tiny Planets is clearly designed to introduce children to the joys of marijuana, what with characters named Bing and Bong travelling to weird and distant planets and meeting strange creatures without leaving their the comfort of their old sofa.
Well, girl certainly was limber enough for it - I loved the clock warmup bits the most. 
There’s some sort of “space ark” show on here with these robots that explore the world you know, recycling, sewerage treatment, electricity, etc. - well, one does, the others offer commentary from the base ship. God, it’s shit, with really crappy CGI and voices that make me want to crush the little droids underfoot.
Oh, now, them’s fightin’ words.
I’m just a bill, yes I’m only a bill, and I’m sitting here on Capitol Hill…
Schoolhouse Rock was the best.
No, please, I’m a pacifist! I don’t wanna fight.
Just give me 10 secods warning so I can leave the room before the songs start playing. Then we can co-exist in peace.
As my 12-yr-old daughter put it once: “I’d like to bop the doodle out of 'em!”
I must say, you’ve got quite a tolerance level there. Two minutes is about 1 minute and 45 seconds more of Oobi than** I** can stand. Although I must confess to collapsing in gales of laughter over the grandfather puppet–Grandpoo.
GRANDPOO*?!?!?!?*