I know, I know. I’m a cheesy, sleazy, greasy slimeball for even considering it. Never thought it would, er, come to this. But here are the facts: I have no time for a damn date, much less a healthy relationship…which I’m not emotionally ready for, anyway. I am lonely and horny. I crave the touch of a female. As much as it goes against my nature, I’m beginning to think about making a little business transaction for some temporary relief. I just don’t know if it’s worth compromising my so-called integrity for a few moments of pleasure. It’s not that I have anything against prostitutes themselves (I’ve been friends with a few)…but I’ve always thought of the profession as terribly demeaning and I’ve looked down on the customers. Me? A cringejohn? (yuck, spitooey)…meanwhile, I’m going insane from testosterone poisoning.
Advice, please. Men, women, pro, con, good experiences, bad ones, none at all…I respect the opinions of this board, so talk to me.
I’m going to venture a guess that he’s already tried that route and found it lacking in a certain quality that would cause him to seek alternate means of gratification.
The risks far outweigh the reward IMHO. TN*hippie, my advice is not to do it. If you must, why not try to contact one of your old friends that you mentioned.
Wow. You guys are great. A man comes in here with a problem, and immediately, y’all suggest he masturbate. That’s the kinda wisdom we’ve come to expect from the TM. I am sure TN*Hippie would never even have thought of masturbation without your help.
As to the OP, I can’t say from experience one way or another, but if you do go the commercial route, I would venture to guess that spending more rather than less is a very good idea. I was propositioned by a street walker at a gas station recently. I said no, but while I was filling her up ( the car, morons, THE CAR!!! )I chatted with the woman. She said a: She loved her job. b: She had been doing it 10 years. c: she averaged about 5 guys a night. d: She charged $20 a throw, which I figured out, using a standard 5 day work week with 2 weeks of vacation a year, means she has fucked 12,500 guys for the princely sum of 25k/year. Seems she dosen’t value herself highly at all, and in my experience, you get what you pay for. (In general, no experience in sex for $$$)
An edition of The Stranger featured a guide to obtaining the services of a prostitute. Admittedly, it’s about finding a male prostitute, but seems to me it might be at least moderately applicable. The author provides general hints at the end of the article, as well a narrative about his, um, research on the subject. You might also want to browse through the Savage Love archive, also from The Stranger. Although I don’t recall any specific issues, I know Dan Savage has given a bunch of advice over the years about how to hire a prostitute.
That’s about all the help I can offer, though. Except to reiterate what you already know (and are probably growing tired of reading) - you definitely want to use protection. Lots of it.
One last thing. I hesitate to ask, because you probably have already given this a lot of thought, but - would hiring a prostitute actually solve your problem? If you’re just horny, I’d think it would, but then wouldn’t masturbation do the same? And if you’re lonely for companionship as well as horny - well, I’m just guessing that not a lot of deep and meaningful interaction goes on between sex seller and sex buyer.
How about phone sex? Might be cheaper and there would seem to be more interaction (verbal that is) with the provider of the service. Instead of a hooker who just wants to get finished with you to move on to the next customer, you get someone who wants to keep you talking to her (to get more money, natch). I’ve never used either, but would probably go this route if I had to choose.
No direct experience here, but a male friend of mine started “seeing” a fairly high priced prostitute. She had her own web page, is how he found her. Anyhow, poor “Jim” became rather infatuated and started imagining that she had similar feelings for him. He spent more money that he could afford on her, and after a few months she blew him off. All in all a rather pathetic situation.
Dire warnings aside, I personally don’t think exchanging sex for money is immoral or sleazy per se, but you just have to keep your expectations within realistic parameters. My guess is you want the affection & caring that go with a woman’s touch, and you may find it not very satisfying realizing it’s a purely business transaction.
OTOH, if you can find a decent pro (rather than a street crack pro) & you take necessary precautions etc etc, you may have a great time. I still think you’d be better off waiting for a non-commercial lay, though.
Okay, sleeping with a prostitute is not the safest thing in the world. This is a fact. But then, neither is sleeping around with random strangers.
However, it seems as if some of the people replying to this thread do not understand the way Hippie is feeling.
Masturbation is enjoyable, phone sex is enjoyable, cybersex is enjoyable but none of these things even remotely comes close to replacing the actual touch of another human being. While prostitutes are not known for being overly affectionate and cuddly, it is better than being alone. I can completely understand this feeling.
I am fairly certain that Hippie didn’t get to be the age he is without knowing the different ways he can pleasure himself. I don’t doubt that he’s tried quite a few of them.
The best way I know to try to describe it is to imagine if you were separated from someone you love very much. You can masturbate thinking of them, you can have phone sex with them, you can cyber with them but nothing is going to replace the wonderful feeling of having them in your arms. It is a very similar feeling.
While I would hope that Hippie could find someone special to spend time with, go out with and for heaven’s sake, kiss, right now he needs human companionship combined with sexual contact. He seems to have hit on what might be a temporary solution to the problem.
So, enough with the suggestions he masturbate in one form or another. I wager that he’s grown tired of doing that very thing and that is why he is searching for different answers.
I’ve always liked you, evilbeth, and this thread shows why.
I’m a lot like TN*hippie in that I’m also lonely and need a girlfriend. I’d never consider a prostitute, but that’s my personal decision. I’d don’t think I’d ever recommend it, either, but I would say that if you come to the point where you have to do something, then maybe you should give it a try, just to satisfy your curiosity. As has already been suggested, I doubt it’ll accomplish what you think it’ll accomplish. And if you’re hurting that badly, then you run the risk of becoming more attached to the prostitute than you should.
But at least you’ll know. As for me, I get by knowing that at some point, I’ll find someone. I refuse to compromise my values and integrity, no matter what it takes. I’d advise the same for you, hippie. It’ll be worth it when (not if, mind you) you find someone.
I’ve heard of a club in San Francisco (where else?) called the Power Exchange. The door charge is kinda steep, but you can have all kinds of kinky sex with kinky people.
Well…if masturbation is completely out of the question (it would be sex with someone who loves him though :)), and there was no possibility of trying to pick up someone at a bar or something similar, then pretty much you are left with getting a pro.
As evilbeth said, sex with a stranger is not safe. Sex with a prostitute is much less safe.
Power Exchange ain’t all it’s cracked up to be. IMO. Then again, it’s cracked up to be quite a lot. Well, at any rate, whatever tickles your pickle, as I like to say, but that’s not really my bag, baby.
There’s this new thing called the “internet” and it can be quite useful in finding a pros- I mean escort who is NOT some sick scrag off the corner, rather a clean and decent businessperson. Sure it’s more expensive but you get what you pay for.
I’d recommend a site like http://www.bigdoggie.net which has a directory which allows you to see who’s “open for business” in a city near you, as well as read what past clients of this or that person have to say about their experience, etc. etc.
If ya want to go with a chap “profesional” then I have 3 words for you, Blow Up Doll.
Hear me out, It has a better personality than a crackwhore, smells better (if you clean it regularly) only charges you one time, for years after its all free. dont have to worry about small talk afterwards. You wont have to worry about her pimp. You dont have to worry about hurting it. and it has all the necissary handholds.
Don’t some massage parlors offer handjobs? It would be a woman’s touch, but little chance for disease transmission. Around here, however, there is considerable concern that some of them women working there are earning money to pay exorbitant immigration fees to unscrupulous people, so it’s sorta like sex slavery. Not cool to support that.
I think spending more or a nicer type of upscale call girl, such as RTA is describing. Crack whores are on the street, and so are cops posing as whores. And of course wrap that rascal.
Don’t flame me, o minions of Jerry Falwell, I don’t happen to believe sex between adults should be a crime, even when money is involved. That’s why I have no qualms with TN*hippie’s questions.
)I chatted with the woman. She said a: She loved her job. b: She had been doing it 10 years. c: she averaged about 5 guys a night. d: She charged $20 a throw, which I figured out, using a standard 5 day work week with 2 weeks of vacation a year, means she has fucked 12,500 guys for the princely sum of 25k/year. Seems she dosen’t value herself highly at all, and in my experience, you get what you pay for. (In general, no experience in sex for $$$)