That’s the spirit, Falcon! Forgive and forget. And maybe if you dress like Ruffian, as you plan, and dye your hair, and change the way you act, you’ll be able to keep him this time. You know, your name kept popping up at our Carribbean cook-out, and we could barely contain our, uh, admiration for your perseverance. We were rolling on the ground, clutching our sides with admiration! Good for you.
Oh, incidentally, Balance’s brain’s nutrient solution needs to be changed daily or brain damage will set in, and only I have the formula. Something to think about…
Oh APB, darling…remember that power of government forms I have? According to the official record, all that never happened. She who controls the forms controls reality. Something for YOU to think about. raises eyebrow and smiles
I dunno APB, I think Falcon has you on that one…
Curses! Fortunately most elected politicians are prime candidates for EVO. We may be able to squelch these petty bureaucrats. If that doesn’t work, there’s always the press, BUHWAAHAAHAAAHAAAHAAAAHAAAA!!! “Common knowledge” has even more reality-shaping power than government records! Let’s see now, who’s on the roster…
APB…it matters not what the press or elected officials do. Everyone knows the REAL power comes from the consultants and contractors who do all the actual work. And I control them. slow smile
So, I agree with inoci for one…looks like I’ve got you on this one. Bwahahahahahahahaha!
<The real Balance walks in, brushing snow out of his hair.>
You guys actually fell for that clichéd clone bit? He looks (ah…looked) nothing like me!
<Looks apologetically at Falcon>
Didn’t you get my note? “Gone to Tibet. Left a clone as a decoy. XXX, Balance”? And just what kind of necromancy are you attempting on that clone? It looks like a clip from “Debbie Does Forest Lawn Memorial”. Er…not that I’ve ever seen that film, of course…
Ahem, anyway, the yetis have agreed to handle China for us. They were starting to get pissed at them, anyway.
No, I didn’t get your note. Hmpf. Men. rolls eyes
And hey…I was trying whatever I thought would help you wake up, hon! Now then…you look cold, hon. Shall we go warm up before we deal with APB and company? smiles
Maybe dogsbody threw it out when she cleaned up. (She should know better than to clean a villains’ lair, but she’s such a good minion otherwise that we’ll let it slide.) Now, please bide a moment…
<Sends a squadron of flying cats to spray Ruffian with Rapid Leather/Rubber-Shrinking Solution (patent pending) and triggers the EMP-generator planted in the brain sequestered in APB’s lab>
Well, Falcon, that should keep them busy while we make out–I mean, “up”.
Oh my…and once Ruffian’s suit shrinks, DeathLlama should keep her out of our hair for a bit. Very clever, my dear. I should have known you’d never fall for her wiles…
Now then, would you like to see the renovations I made to my bedroom? And making out, making up…there’s a difference?
turns as she and Balance walk off to stick her tongue out at APB - told you!
Hey, I never clean anything. I tidy up, occasionally, but that’s just a matter of making the piles of things neater, and making sure that any paper plans are buried in the piles so that no nosy parkers can just look at your desk and know what’s up…
Still, maybe I did move that note.
But I’ll just sit here with this Wand of Transmutation and watch the door while you two…erm…discuss things.
Do villains get groupies?
Well, dogsbody, I suppose it did constitute a plan of sorts…maybe you just covered it up. And making the piles neat is cleaning up in my book. It’s more than I ever do, anyway…
Oh, and here’s a ring of polymorph control to go with that wand, so you don’t accidentally turn them into something dangerous. When in doubt, go for the “slime mold” setting.
Well, Balance gets me. Do I count as a groupie, hon? smiles
If you want to be a groupie, Falc, you’ve got it. I’m not one for formal titles (though “Mistress of the Dark Lord” might suit you 
), so you can call yourself anything you like when you stick with me.
blushes, then laughs
Nah, I think I like “Mistress of the Dark Lord.” Now then…I don’t believe you were finished apologizing to me? 
And damn…your tricks must have worked (of course), APB and company haven’t bothered us for a while…
Alright, I’ve decided to join the EVO.
:if you’re a superhero whip out your secret decoder ring and read the next few lines:
psst, read it backwards
.sworbeye htiw xednaps ni mrowepat tnaig a ekil fo tros. nihtiw morf meht etalihnna neht dna sknar rieht etartlifni nac I os gninoj ekaf tsuj m’I. gninioj yllaer ton m’I
Um. That’s a very vivid image, there, son. Yecch.
However, you’re not my problem, so you just run along and continue to distract APB & Co whilst Balance & Falcon make…amends.
Besides, didn’t you notice what they did to the Crimson Tapeworm? Sheesh, no-one pays attention anymore…
Oops, sorry.
That quote should be:
And what I’d like to know is, do you have eyebrows or does your spandex?
Those good guys just don’t know good crypto…
Ok people, don’t let steeljaw know we’re onto him, the way things stand now we can use him as bait.
anywho, here’s the latest mission report:
MISSION REPORT
-from what remains of Antarctica-
My experiment in Antarctica was a failure, though not a total one. The meddling of those heroes prevented the penguin phase from taking place. This depressed me, but I finally remembered that hte penguins were a decoy, and that the actual goal of the project was completed.
I was able to shatter the Ross Ice Shelf, and I have place guidance devices on all the resulting bergs. We now have a new armada of cold death. This should prove useful. So far I’ve been able to sink twelve of the puny mortal cruisers sent to stop me. I did lose an awful lot of zombie-droids, but I’m learning to cope with that.
In the past twelve hours my legions have been busy carving weapon mounts into the ice, and several of my more artistic oriented zombie-droids have been making the tips of the bergs look pretty.
So I’ve just activated the cloaking devices and spells that will cover our approach the the secret target. Anyone know what that is?