Faith Hill: Breathe on This, You Soggy Bitch!

Jesus Fucking Christ.

If I turn on my radio one more time and hear that screeching bitch wailing about how great she is at breathing and the intense pleasure that it brings her, I think I am going to drive my ass down to Alabama or wherever it is all these country stars live and ram a dead gopher down her throat.

“Breathe on THIS!” I will shriek hysterically, my eyes glowing fiercely.

She will choke on the mangy rotten carcass (did I mention, it’s been dead a while? Think the raccoon mascot from the Tom Green show), trying desperately to suck in enough air to sustain her pathetic whining voice long enough to persuade me to stop.

Her eyes will start to roll back in her head, and her gag reflex will kick in, causing her mouth to fill with vomit so vile and putrescent that the only thing exceeding its limits of disgustingness in in fact the very song she is being punished for. It won’t be long after that, she’ll be dead in just a few moments.

She deserves worse, I know.

Then I’ll go after the ** writers ** of that pathetic piece of whinery …

Nevertheless, the video rules!! Then again, I’m just an ignorant Southern boy. :smiley:

Note to self… never breath while near Brunetter.

Sheesh, switch the radio station! Switch to CDs or tapes!

I don’t tolerate listening to music that drives me batty. Unless you are trapped in a workplace that chooses the radio station, the remedy for Ms. Hill’s screeching is obvious.

Yosemite babe, although I often agree with what you have to say, I do need to set you straight on this one.

There is ONE radio station receivable in this town.

And it seems that their playlist instructions are to play this song EVERY HOUR WITHOUT FAIL.

I am not usually very picky about music … I will put up with just about anything to keep me company on my long drives (at home, I have different choices… in the car, it’s the radio or nothing). But when I hear a song I consider this bad … and when I hear it every time I get in the car … forgive me, but my usual even temper is a little stretched!

Brunetter, m’dear, this is why I generally avoid music (I stick with game music, like the Descent II soundtrack… woohoo!).

However, if ya needs help placing the slapdown on someone, I’ll give ya a hand any day of the week.

Brunetter, here’s what to do.

Sing as loud as you can when that song comes on (turn down the volume on the radio) and instead of that song, sing “Sympathy for the Devil” by the Rolling Stones.
Anyone who ever sees you doing this will be sure never to give you any shit ever again!

  1. Who is Faith Hill (sorry, I ain’t too hip these days)?
  2. Is she worse than ManIAm Scary?

Coldfire,

She’s a goddess us dumb country-western hicks listen to and slobber all over her videos. Very easy on the eyes and a great voice to boot.

Yeah, granted, this ain’t high-brow, cerebral music, but what the hell, you can dance to it and drink beer.

Did she rip off Bush’s “Breathe”?

Why not just turn the damn car radio off the instant the song starts? Wait a few minutes and turn the damn car radio on again. Seems simple enough to me but what do I know?

I wouldn’t blame Faith Hill, I blame those lame ass radio stations. No matter if it’s country, rock, or New Rock…

every radio station has three of four songs that they play over and over again. I try to keep in on one station during work, but the same tired ass songs will be rotated every two hours.

I hate the radio. I’m getting old, I’m only listening it for talk radio…NPR and Howard.

Wow. Someone who hates Faith Hill. Probably hates cocker spaniel puppies, Christmas presents, and giggling babies, too.

Yes.

Don’t like dogs in general.

So bloody depressing,

Yuck!

And this is Faith’s fault how? Maybe you should reserve the dead gopher/racoon for the fuckwads at the radio station.

In all honesty, I would do Faith in New York minute! And that’s coming from a gay man.

Faith Hill brings out the worst of my mean-spirited, small-minded, insecure female jealousy.

I look like her on the INSIDE. Really. Don’t have her voice though. God and she’s rich! And isn’t her husband cute, too? Or no? ARGH!

<whimpers>

But I agree, it’s the dorks at the radio stations that make us really HATE artists. It’s not they themselves are personally crooning the song into the mike 6 times a day.

Faith Hill is terrific! Radio stations may play her songs in maximum rotation, but that’s fine by me. Save your ire for a more worthy target.

Apparently, not all that gay.

Death to the evil that is Faith Hill !!! (truth be told, I don’t care that much as I am an MP3 kind of guy so I can be selective when listening to tunes - switch to CBC when the music in the car sucks too!)

I just felt like I needed to support Brunetter! (plus I am always up for a good lynching)

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Kepi *
**

Hold it right there, bucko! No fair playing both sides of the fence! Faith is a hetero fantasy! (Ok, ok…you can have Ricky Martin)

And, to Anthracite…

Originally posted by Rysdad
Wow. Someone who hates Faith Hill.

**Yes. **

Probably hates cocker spaniel puppies

**Don’t like dogs in general. **

Christmas presents

**So bloody depressing, **

and giggling babies, too.

Yuck!

…if you’re joking, that’s pretty funny. If you’re serious, then that’s pretty sad.

OK, Rysdad. I’ll give you Faith and I’ll take her husband Tim. Will that work? :slight_smile: