Just noticed. I’m somewhat overweight and I haven’t had sex lately. Correlation?
Do I really gotta join a gym just to have sex? Or is it possible to be tubby and sexually fulfilled at the same time?
Just need to know if there’s hope.
Sorry, fat girls, but this thread isn’t really for you. I know for a fact that you fat girls are having more sex than us fat guys. That’s 'cos I know for a fact that you’re not picking us for sex. (We like you better than you like us!) 
Ahh… I put on a shocking amount of weight about four years ago and have also had celibacy forced upon me since then (FOUR YEARS!!!). I’m pretty sure there is a corellation… the weight gain happened when I was suffering from depression, so the lack-of-relationship I put down to depression-type-things. But, I got back to my default self about six months ago, though I’ve still to lose the weight I put on. I think there is a corellation between weight and sexual attractiveness. I think [lowervoiceinfearofretribution] women just don’t find fat people attractive[/lowervoiceinfearofretribution].
Looking at my small circle of friends (just paying attention to the fat ones) I know other straight fat guys - none in relationships, gay fat guys - all in relationships, fat straight girls - all in relationships, and fat gay girls - none in relationships. The non-fat people seem to have no problem with relationships at all, whether male or female, gay or straight.
As I see it, there are two ways you can get female companianship - either lose some weight or become immensely rich. Personally, I’ve got my lottery ticket right here <pats pocket>.
Then again… since fatness is partly genetic, some women must not mind too much, otherwise surely we’d have died out by now?
I’m married. Does that disqualify me?
Anyway, I’m pretty satisfied. In fact, I don’t have to leave for work for a good 20 minutes yet… :o
Chubby McChubbenstein, checking in.
I’m 6’3" and my over the past 5 years my weight has fluctuated betweeen 240 and 300. I’ve been told that “I carry it well”, whatever that means. No one can ever believe it when I tell them I weigh 275. Everyone usually guesses 225 or 230. Anyway, I met my SO about 5 years ago, I was probably at 250. We have had a pretty kickass sexual relationship since then. Oh yeah, I like her for her brain, too.
Prior to her, it was few and far between.
She says she’ll still love me unless I weigh 450 – That’s her cutoff point. I keep telling her I’m going to balloon up to 435 or 440 just to see if she’s telling the truth. 
Me checking in here… 6’4" and (at last weighing) 320 lbs. I’m friggin’ HUGE! But, in my defense, at about 250 lbs. I’d be pretty well built! My shoulders are VERY wide, my feet are size 16, etc. In short, I’m fat, but even if I were not fat, I’d be WELL above what western doctors consider healthy (screw them, anyways![sup]No offense meant to posters whom I respect and I know are doctors![/sup])…
When I tell people what I weigh, they don’t believe me… they always insist that I must weigh about 30-40 lbs. less… must be because of my height and over-all bodily gigantism…
I have considered a career as a WWF star, but the main problem there is that I’m not sure I could keep a straight face during those interviews! Stone Cold! (snigger), when I catch you I’m gonna (snigger) put my FOOT up your ass!! (BWA-HA-HA!)
For the record: I have a fairly good sex life (why not GREAT? That damn “period” stuff that Astrofiancee insists on having for a week or so every month :mad: )… waited a LONG time for it, but eventually I met the right woman. And, again for the record, if I could go back in time and change anything, I wouldn’t!
Fat guys, don’t lose faith! There IS the right woman out there for you! Trust Astroboy! Send him money! Send him LOTS of money! You will be better for it!
Got you beat, astroboy. I’m 6’6", 385 pounds. It might be a bit harder to find someone, but not impossible, by any means. I’m married, and my wife has no problem with my size.
You interested in a female point of view? The three guys I dated the most seriously, including the one I married, were all overweight. They weren’t so big that they’d appear on the cover of Weekly World News[sup]TM[/sup], but they were by no means buff and sculpted.
However, the appeal of each lay in personality, sense of humor, funness, attitude - you know, the important stuff. I like to think that a person is more than their packaging, but I’m just special that way… 
I’m beginning to wonder if there’s causation rather than just correlation beyond a certain amount of overweight.
There are those gentleman who you just know by looking at them haven’t seen Mr. Happy, even at full mast without a mirror.
Those are the gentlman I wonder if they are getting any, and if so, how.
And I will admit this is a double standard for me, since I don’t have the same question about women who are overweight, even to this same degree.
-Doug (6’ 190 lbs.)
Count me in. I’m 6’1", 315 lbs. Like some others here, I’m often told I “carry it well” and most people are very surprised when I tell them how much I weigh (they usually guess around 230-250). And I have a great sex life. I’ve been with my girlfriend for almost 3 years and our sex life has continually improved over that time.
If you’re referring to quantity over quality, I haven’t suffered there, either. I haven’t dated or slept with hundreds of women or anything, but I’ve been with a variety of women and haven’t remained single for more than a year since I started dating (sure, those times FELT like 10 years, but…) Those “dry spells” weren’t so much a function of my weight as my attitude. I spent months being depressed about my last relationship breaking up, then more months depressed because I didn’t have a girlfriend. My confidence was shot to hell and that’s why I wasn’t gettin’ any.
So, despite the fact that I’ve been overweight my whole life, I’ve had plenty of girlfriends (even a couple of hotties), lots of great sex, and plenty of other opportunities that I either turned down or which didn’t work out for one reason or another. And this is all without even really trying. I’ve never been any good at that whole run-out-and-work-at-trying-to-date-people thing. My relationships mostly “just happen.”
Zillions of people have said this before, but I’ll say it again: attractiveness is more about self-confidence than anything else. Sure, having a nicely toned body will catch many women’s eyes, but being overweight and out-of-shape is nothing that can’t be balanced out with other personality traits. If I’m being confident as hell (even borderline arrogant) and can make people laugh, women still want me regardless of my weight.
Astroboy: I’ve thought about the WWF thing myself. Heh… Problem is, even the fat guys in wrestling are in far better shape than I am, and they’re much more willing to take pain than I am. I’m a wuss.
I have dated a number of overweight men…a couple of them severely so. I’d MUCH rather date someone who was OVER weight than UNDER. I like a big guy!
Doesn’t body image and self-confidence have a lot more to do with sexual prowess and interest than your TRUE appearance (whatever that is)?
-L
Jeez, I was gonna suggest you female chubby chasers NOT encourage the fatsos. ( “I carry my weight well” - where, exactly? ) However - after visiting a junior high school lately and observing the young in a naturalized habitat, I have come to the conclusion fat guys are going to be everywhere in the near future. Way too many crew-cut, droopy-short, obese Bobby Hill types. Very few buff hunky Terry McGinniss types. I’d hate to be a young woman and have to pick from that herd.
One of the things to keep in mind, however, is that appearances are temporary. Far from being a “chubby chaser” the REAL fact of the matter is that there have been several instances in which a potential partner who I had interests in beyond appearance happened to be overweight.
I’m not suggesting that appearances aren’t important but that:
-L
Suddenly not feeling so fat
6’1" 240, I weighed that much when I met mrsstuffinb and I fluctuate +/- 5 pounds since. Verrrry good sex life. I have to go with other posters and say it’s confidence. You act like you aren’t getting any, and you won’t get any.
True story - Last night.
I’m at the grocery store and had one of those moments of mutual atrractiveness with a lady in the next line. When I’m checking out she asks if she could give me her number.
Me “Oh, sorry, I’m married”
Her “Happily?”
But us Fatsos need encouraging! How can you tell the chubby chasers to leave us alone? heheh.
“In a suitcase?”
“It’s all in my big toe.”
What are you asking?
I, too, hate the ugly, fat cartoon charactors. But those buff, hunky cartoon charactors, ::rrrrroooowwlllll::
and, “observing the young in a naturalized habitat” ???
You’re pretty weird, judging from this post.
:rolleyes:
Not even my 14yr old daughter is this shallow.
I’d much rather spend my time with a man who’s heavy that has spent time developing his mind and personality than a gym-god who spends his time watching himself flex.
Hm, I rarely point this out, but I’m 6’, and in the same weight class as some of the big guys here. Funny, even today I have problems saying what my weight is.
I have met more than my fair share of narrow minded women in life, who seemed to equate being overweight with being ugly. It’s highly ironic, but women will be the first to complain that guys are always looking for the Sports Illustrated swimsuit model type, but then turn around and ignore a guy who might be all of 10 pounds overweight. This kind of crap on both sides of the gender divide is killing those of us who won’t fit in regardless of how much weight we lose. If I did lose the 100+ pounds I need to, I still wouldn’t look skinny.
Let me echo something else. Looks don’t matter in the end. It’s easier for me to lose weight (Ha!) than it is to change a rotten soul or personality. You could fall in love with someone with the looks of a god, but if they are the most self-centered, callous, inconsiderate person you’ve ever met, would you really want to live with them? You probably wouldn’t even enjoy a one night stand with them.
All I’ve heard most of my teenage and adult years is the same song and dance. They would insist I lose weight, implying it was the cause of all my ills. And that if I did lose the 100+ pounds I needed to, I’d suddenly be popular, romance would fall my way, and I’d get all the good jobs. By the time I started talking to people who couldn’t see me (via the net) I was a seriously screwed up young man. It took some very patient people to get me past that. By the time I met my future wife, I’d improved 1000%.
Do I have a sex life? Hell yes. I can keep my wife shaking and shivering for as long as I like. She’ll be the first to admit that. We fit together in life and love wonderfully. She’s crazy about me, and I her. Does she care that I might not be graced with rock hard abs? Nope. Does she miss me not having the muscles of a gym rat? Nope.
In the end, I have a soul. More that most people could ever hope to have.
Salinqmind:
Fuck off.
buh bye, JB
I suppose that, after this, I have to respond.
I love my husband dearly. He and our children are my world. He has made me happier than I feel I deserve to be.
I have been overweight since I was about 14. Men didn’t take a second look at me because of it. In HS, I was the brain, the nerd, if you will: I was active in drama, debate, speech team, newspaper and band: but no one would even think of asking me out. As a result, no one ever understood the real reason why I was overweight. But I persevered, basically taking the attitude of, “I’m here, you can’t get rid of me, so live with it.”
College I started to feel good about myself. I actually belonged there. I had friends who cared about me. I actually had my first date in college. I had to ask him out, but it was fun.
Then the bad relationship. A very long time of him wanting to change me: to have me lose weight, to support him, to be at his beck and call whenever he needed anything, to give up my very identity for him. I was naive and thought that was love. It wasn’t. It was control. I got out.
Then I met my hubby. At the point we met IRL, I wouldn’t have cared what he looked like. I was in love with him. He was my dream: everything I ever wanted. I much prefer a big guy, and when I saw him for the first time, he was everything I had ever dreamed of.
I don’t care how much he weighs, and thank goodness, he doesn’t care how much I weigh. He is my dream come true, and I love him with all my heart.
And, regarding the OP, the sex is fantastic!
Guys, gals, please do not get my nice little thread thrown into the Pit. I too think what salinqmind said was offended, but I think he?/she? has been adequately answered by reasonable argument and logic, by SexyWriter for instance. (Nothing like a good dose of intelligence to make hate lose its attractiveness.)
I think we chubs just have to get used to the fact that anywhere we go, we will run into intolerant people who want to puke at the sight of us, perhaps because of subconscious fear that they may some day resemble us.
Lest someone think my OP was insensitive to the plight of fat chicks, I think we have to acknowledge that overweight girls and young women go through an extraordinary amount of cruelty and self-image-thrashing. But I still believe they get more sex than we do.
I meant “offensive,” of course.